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SpongeBob SquarePants (Seasons 6-8) Retrospective: The “Bad” Era

April 28, 2024April 29, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

Oh boy, what in the world did I get myself into?

Yeah, you all knew this was coming!

This was when SpongeBob SquarePants got truly as bad as folks claimed the show got after the first movie. While I still stand by my opinion that Seasons 4 and 5 weren’t the worst things in the world, these next three seasons I’m about to talk about is MORE than deserving a seat at the table. Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh. It’s not the worst thing ever but it’s undoubtedly SpongeBob’s roughest time throughout his history up to this point.

There are multiple different factors that played into the poor quality of these three seasons I’m about to talk about. Part of it is because most of the writers from the original three seasons were no longer present. Another part of it is because the writers of these three seasons likely tried to add their own style of humor and slapstick to the show that just fell flat. And of course, there’s that part that might be how the show has gone on for way too long and basically ran out of ideas. However, I do think the one main factor in all of this has to do with Nickelodeon and them relying SpongeBob SquarePants WAY too much to keep their network afloat!

Nickelodeon has been a controversial network for quite some time, ESPECIALLY in recent events (Dan Schneider is going straight to hell!). A big part of that has to do with their habit of expecting a new show to be a big grand hit RIGHT out of the gate and never looking back. When a new show doesn’t meet anything near those criteria, they tend to disregard it quite quickly.

So much so that they won’t even have the decency to air the rest of the episodes of a season but just dump it on their “back-up” network and letting that show go out with an absolute whimper. Or in the case of The Legend of Korra, they’ll just stop airing new episodes halfway through a season on TV and dump the rest of the show on their website. Yes, that really happened!

However, when a show does in fact become as big of a hit as they want, they go too far in the other direction and milk it until that cow is dry. And even then, they’ll just find another cow to milk.

There has been two shows throughout their history that has been the direct result of that: The Fairly Oddparents and SpongeBob SquarePants. With Nickelodeon constantly cranking out new episodes and content for these long lasting franchises like crazy, it played a significant role in their inevitable decline in quality.

It was by the points of Seasons 6, 7, and 8 that Nick was relying HEAVILY on the SpongeBob brand to keep the network at a steady heart rate. They would constantly demand for new episodes to be made as fast as humanly possible. Don’t worry about the overall quality. All that matters is that they get a ton of episodes released so they can be covered for the next two to three years before having to worry about anything beyond that timeline.

When watching Seasons 6 through 8, you can definitely tell that Nick was rushing production for new episodes of SpongeBob that the writers never had time to sit down and figure out what the hell they were even doing. It was that bad!

The end results of that leads to an era of very ill-fated and mean spirited episodes that goes against everything that the show has been up to this point. You have characters acting constantly out of characters, the same repetitive “torture porn” jokes, inconsistent animation with unintentional creepy imagery, messed up morals that aren’t well thought out in the slightest, and episodes that lack any sort of substance whatsoever. If there was ever a time where the post-movie haters got to gloat how right they were with SpongeBob losing his way after the first three seasons, this was it.

Let’s dive a little deeper as to why this era of SpongeBob SquarePants has been the show’s most infamous.

Seasons 6 & 7

You might be wondering why I’m going to be talking about Seasons 6 and 7 at the same time? Well, that’s because they both have the exact same kind of problems that I just mentioned. So much so that it’s pretty hard to tell which season that each episode belongs to. Not only because Nickelodeon aired episodes in between both seasons before either one was officially complete (This would not be the only time they would do that in this show before and after!) but because the majority of the episodes gave that exact sense of ill-conceived, poorly thought out gags and storytelling.

First off, you have the infamous episodes that lacked any sort of substance. These were mainly ones that take the most paper-thin premise imaginable and filled 90% of the runtime with filler. You have Penny Foolish which is about Mr. Krabs trying so hard to get just a little penny from SpongeBob. You have The Card which is about SpongeBob trying to protect a special Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy card from Patrick. You have A Day Without Tears which SpongeBob makes a bet with Squidward that can he go a whole day without crying. There’s also Gone, which is about everyone but SpongeBob disappearing from Bikini Bottom, only to find out they left because it was National No SpongeBob Day! They are about as dull, one-note, and shallow as the premise of each episode makes it out to be.

You have the infamous episodes that show of the lackluster animation and gross out images. There’s The Splinter that shows the most disgusting looking splinter that you will likely ever see on your life. There’s House Fancy that shows Squidward’s entire toenail coming off in rather painful fashion. There’s Keep Bikini Bottom Beautiful where we see Squidward eating, bathing, and sleeping in complete garbage. While the earlier SpongeBob seasons weren’t necessarily a stranger to gross out humor, these seasons take it way too far to the point where these episodes might make you legit nauseous.

You have the infamous episodes that completely butchers the characters beyond repair. You have Boating Buddies, Choir Boys, and Squid’s Visit which makes SpongeBob come across as a complete stalker with the way he refuses to let Squidward have his space and knows his home and lifestyle near perfectly. You have A Pal for Gary that makes SpongeBob look like an arrogant and illogical jerk to Gary, who is literally getting TORMENTED by the other pet in this house. You have Yours Mine and Mine and Stuck in the Wringer which takes Patrick’s stupidity to ridiculous level and making him look like a selfish a-hole. There’s even One Course Meal, which makes Mr. Krabs look like the most soulless crab in the ocean by trying to drive Plankton into committing suicide (an episode which even Clancy Brown admitted he was very uncomfortable doing voice work for). These episodes were so bad that I wouldn’t blame anyone if it made fans not look at certain characters the same way again.

You also have the infamous special episodes, especially one in particular, that were so overhyped and underwhelming that it made people lose interest in the show completely. While SpongeBob vs The Big One was pretty good, just about every other one in Seasons 6 and 7 were about as lackluster as the majority of special SpongeBob episodes. The Clash of Triton was mediocre at best that made you want to sympathize with King Neptune’s whiny and annoying son but failed spectacularly. SpongeBob’s Last Stand was a bold attempt on making commentary on environmental awareness that mostly fell flat and was ultimately forgettable. And do I even need to mention the dull, obnoxious, poorly directed, visually ugly, non-existential story driven, and disappointing as hell special that was Truth or Square. The 10th anniversary special that was nothing but false advertising and empty promises, the worst possible celebration for ten years of SpongeBob SquarePants that you could imagine. That one special alone was so bad that it made plenty of folks drop the show completely, such as yours truly.

That’s not to say there were ZERO good episodes of any kind to be found in Seasons 6 and 7 such as Sand Castles in the Sand and The Bad Guy Club for Villains. It’s just that you would have to dig HARD to find those hidden gems buried within such garbage. Anything else you would find is nothing but trashy, greasy nonsense. A sign that Nickelodeon no longer valued the quality of SpongeBob SquarePants but more saw it for it’s name and brand alone. There’s plenty of fingers to be pointed around here but this was the show at it’s absolute lowest point.

However, why didn’t I lump Season 8 into this as well?! Well, it’s complicated!

Season 8

To be clear, Season 8 was also not a good overall season whatsoever. There were plenty of episodes of the dire examples that I just mentioned to be found here. You have Face Freeze! which showed off the creepiest and most horrifying face expressions that has ever been seen on this show. You have Pet Sitter Pat which made Patrick more unlikable and insufferable than he always has been, allowing poor Gary to be beaten up the whole way through. And it’s better not mentioning Demolition Doofus, the episode where Mrs. Puffs is trying to get SpongeBob literally MURDERED! This was a bad season by all accounts, but it did have it’s moments!

As much as there were plenty of bad things about Season 8, it also had a handful of good things about it. The good things that not only help make it more salvageable compared to Seasons 6 and 7 but also it helped plant the seeds for the inevitable resurrection seasons for the coming years. These were good episodes that helped made Season 8 not just the best out of a bad bunch but also the best possible conclusion to the worst era of SpongeBob’s history.

A handful of fan favorite episodes this season include the likes of Frozen Face Off, Planet of the Jellyfish, Super Villain Aquatic Villain Team Up Is Go!, Chum Fricassee, the Vacation episodes, and The Krabby Patty That Ate Bikini Bottom. However, there were two special episodes that I believed helped evaluate this seasons quite a bit. Those two special episodes were It’s A SpongeBob Christmas! and the Season 8 finale, Hello Bikini Bottom!

While the Vacation episodes with the main characters going on vacations were light and enjoyable enough on their own merits (even if most of them probably could have just been shorts instead of 11 to 22-minute long episodes), these two special episodes were able to capture a certain spark that the majority of this era couldn’t come close to achieving. It showed that not only is it possible for there to be new SpongeBob episodes that were good but that this show did in fact have some creative energy left within itself.

It’s A SpongeBob Christmas! was the first major SpongeBob episode to be strictly in stop motion animation. It also officially premiered on CBS during November 2012 before airing on Nickelodeon a month later. And believe it or not, it was very, very good. It managed to be funny, charming, moving, and just put you right into the Christmas spirit! For as good as the original Christmas Who? special was, It’s A SpongeBob Christmas managed to be just as good if not better than that already classic Christmas animated tale.

I would also go into deep details into how important Hello, Bikini Bottom! was to this season and the whole show in general but I actually have a special piece of that coming next month. And yes, that will be the monthly piece for this yearly SpongeBob retrospective! There’s just so much to talk about that episode and the multiple meanings that it has. Needless to say, it’s a very special episode and one that I feel should be even more appreciated than it already is.

Overall, I guess you can look at Season 8 compared to Seasons 6 and 7 the same way that folks look at Revenge of the Sith compared to the rest of the Star Wars prequel trilogy. It may not be particularly good but it’s definitely the least bad of the three with some redeemable values to it. However, the redeemable values are definitely worth bringing up as it would eventually build up towards another golden era of the yellow sponge quite later on in the future. This is something that I will be tackling in my next piece of the yearly SpongeBob marathon with talking about why Hello, Bikini Bottom! might be the most important episode of SpongeBob SquarePants.

In Conclusion

I’m not sure what more I can say that hasn’t been said about everyone else on the planet to how bad this era of SpongeBob SquarePants truly was. It’s the era which saw SpongeBob at his absolute lowest point. Due to Nickelodeon’s constant micro management and time constraints along with writers that might have been over their heads, Seasons 6-8, even with the last season’s good elements to it, is what sank SpongeBob’s reputation so hard. It was so bad that it killed any good will that most folks had left in this series. It did so much damage to SpongeBob that it made folks not want to acknowledge the legit good episodes that are a part of it because of how bad the majority of the episodes were. Whenever I feel the urge to claim that post-movie SpongeBob was no where near as bad as many have led you to believe, it’s these three seasons that respond back with an enthusiastic, “Yes, it is!”. And it’s then I would lose this fight completely.

I feel sad that the episode I will be talking about next month had to be a part of this era. In some ways, it basically had to die for this era’s sins to push towards the brighter next era that would come along. And it’s that episode of Hello, Bikini Bottom! that I will be covering in May!

Next Month: Why Hello, Bikini Bottom Is The Most Important Episode of SpongeBob SquarePants

SpongeBob SquarePants (Seasons 4-5) Retrospective: The “Awkward” Era

March 29, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

Now, here’s where things start to get quite interesting with SpongeBob SquarePants! As everyone knows by now, the Sponge we all know and love have a very successful run with the first three seasons and a nice movie. With the way the latter played out at the end, that would give you the indication that would act as the conclusion to the series as a whole. Although that was the intention by design by creator Stephen Hillenberg, Nickelodeon demanded for more SpongeBob episodes after the film’s release due to how insanely popular the brand has become. Because of that, Hillenberg resigned as showrunner and a handful of creatives and writers left the show while new creatives and writers stepped in with the new showrunner being Paul Tibbitt and Vincent Waller acting as creative director until 2015.

As you would expect with the way Nickelodeon has been milking SpongeBob content dry throughout the past two decades now, the reason why SpongeBob SquarePants is still around today is because of profits. Not just with the ratings of the show itself but the profit it’s made with the branding and merchandise sales since the show’s inception. If it was up to Hillenberg himself, he would have likely ended the show when he initially did after the third season and first movie. However, because Nickelodeon bought the IP that he pitched, the company has a say for how long SpongeBob goes and when he stops. There is PLENTY to talk about in the post-first movie era of SpongeBob SquarePants, starting off with what is likely considered the most “awkward” era of SpongeBob. That era being Seasons 4 and 5!

Seasons 4 and 5 is interesting to talk about among the fanbase and mainstream media. At the time, this was seen as the period where SpongeBob jumped the shark completely and became bad. However, as times goes on, there has been some reappraisal towards this era of Mr. SquarePants, especially in regards to Season 4. So much so, that not only were these two seasons not bad at all but they were the last remains of the “good” era of SpongeBob or at least the last until MUCH later on.

It’s not that those that praise one or two of this seasons are in deniable of its flaws or it compares to the very best of the first three seasons. It’s just that there are a handful of genuine SpongeBob classics from this era that often get overlooked because of the bad press surrounding these two seasons. And these episodes are good enough to warrant this era of SpongeBob has not completely bad and in some regards good. It’s only once we head into the next era we will be discussing between Seasons 6-8 where the show did indeed get REALLY bad.

However, what is it exactly that has made these two seasons so divisive?! What is it that made it become so hated when they first released and only in recent memory getting reappraisal? Is it strictly nostalgia? Is it because of how bad the series would get later on? Let’s find out by discussing Season 4 and 5 directly!

Season 4

About six months after the original run of SpongeBob SquarePants ended, we got our first taste of this new era of SpongeBob on May 6th, 2005 with Fear of a Krabby Patty. That episode right there would set the tone perfectly for the rest of this season. It made perfectly clear that a new voice has been added to SpongeBob SquarePants.

The animation is more over the top and wacky, the characters have more movement and expressions to them, the episodes moves at a much quicker pace, the jokes become thicker and faster, and it overall just has a much different vibe compared to the first three seasons. Even for kids such as me that grew up with the first three seasons and headed into this one, this had to be quite jarring. All these changes and more are what likely led Season 4 getting a more mixed response compared to the first three seasons.

It is also believed that Season 4 was the start of many infamous trends that later and worse seasons would follow. Trends such as the animation being way too wacky and over the top, the plot and morals feeling half baked and not well thought out, the characters acting more out of character, and treating their one defining trait of each character as absolute jokes every chance they got. Two of the more disliked episodes of Season 4 such as Good Neighbors and The Gift of Gum are severe victims of that.

When looking at it through those lenses, it’s easy to see why Season 4 was quite controversial among the fanbase and media. The changes in terms of tone, animation, and feel to it was certainly a turn-off for many people. It was likely the first sign of the show existing just for the business side of things and not for an artistic side of thing. However, as I said before, there are plenty that look back at Season 4 more fondly. Why is that?

There is always some form of perspective when talking about SpongeBob SquarePants and it largely depends on when you watched each season of the show that it reflected your overall feelings to it. To many fans, they watched Season 4 when they were young kids and likely haven’t develop the critical mindset for themselves just yet. Because of that, they likely looked at Season 4 much more fondly because of the episodes that they do remember being among their favorite episodes of the show. Whether it’s that or how much better Season 4 looks compared to what came after, there are actual episodes for this season that are fondly remembered.

Episodes such as Krusty Towers, Skill Crane, Selling Out, New Leaf, Ghost Host, and Wishing You Well are ones that certain fans would put alongside the best of the original three season era. There are even a handful of “special” episodes that were able to exceed expectations where the ones in the first three seasons felt flat such as Dunces and Dragons and Have You Seen This Snail?, the latter of which might be the most emotional impactful SpongeBob episode ever made. The flaws in terms of the new style and episodes were still present but the good episodes of this series were good enough to where it was able to out weight the negatives of the series.

In hindsight, I really wouldn’t consider Season 4 to be that bad. Heck, I may even go as far to call it quite good. Was it as consistently great as the first three seasons? No but then again, I don’t think any version of Season 4 was ever going to do that. The bad episodes are still there but even the worst episodes of this season would likely not being among the top 10 worst episodes of the show.

With a season that had this amount of good in it, what was it that made it so hated at the time? I do think I have one big answer for that but I feel it’s worth saving that for the very end and go over Season 5 first.

Season 5

Now, Season 5 is a bit harder to defend than Season 4. While there are plenty of good episodes that are presented throughout, the bad episodes were really quite bad. So bad that it basically hurts the reputation of Season 5 and is the reason for many that this was around the time where SpongeBob got bad, even from those that defended Season 4.

I will say if we go back strictly the first half of Season 5, I would think you have a good argument that it’s on par with Season 4. Flawed but still plenty of good episodes here and there to balance out all of the bad ones. You have fan favorites such as The Original Fry Cook, Friend or Foe, Rollar Cowards, Krabs à la Mode, Spy Buddies, and SpongeBob vs. The Patty Gadget. Heck, you even have a handful of episodes in the second half that most fans wouldn’t want to discredit such as The Inmates of Summer, 20,000 Patties Under the Sea, and Pest of the West. However, Season 5 is also the one that would introduce some of the most infamous episodes of the entire series.

Episodes such as Fungus Among Us, Waiting, To Love a Patty, Pat No Pay, and SpongeHenge, played a big factor into supporting the negative narrative surrounding Season 5. It also wasn’t help by the “special” and highest rated episodes such as Atlantis Squarepantis and WhoBob WhatPants?, which were just as ill-fated and poorly received as they come. While there was definitely some gold buried within to find, there was plenty of filth covered in them to be able to find them.

The biggest flaws with most of Season 5 are largely the ones that people always bring up when bringing up everything wrong with modern SpongeBob. The humor is way too grossed out, the characters are thoroughly unlikable and make baffling decisions, the plot and morals are complete rubbish, the logic of each episode is thrown out the window, and way too much of the jokes either center around a character getting hurt repeatedly, doing something stupid/insulting, or just beating you over the head with each individual trait of the characters. While there were certainly a few episodes you could describe that with Season 4, there were WAY too many examples of that in Season 5 that made it defending MUCH more difficult and nearly impossible.

Season 5 has to be the most frustrating season of SpongeBob SquarePants! There are definitely good episodes to be found in this season that rank among the best of the post-classic era and the first half of the season was able to deliver mostly on that. However, it’s around the second half where too many flawed and ill-conceived episodes got released that hinder the overall experience of Season 5. Like Season 4, it gets points for experimenting and finding it’s own identity outside of Stephen Hillenberg, including bringing back the shorts which was used only once in Season 1. However, it loses points for doubling down on the fatal flaws of the bad episodes of Season 4 and making them even worse.

Just like Season 4, Season 5 has seen some appraisal over the years and I think that’s largely because of the amount of good episodes that I mention earlier. Unfortunately, the bad episodes are present and stand out like a plague whenever they appear. There’s too much that’s good to consider it bad but also too much bad to consider good either. Which is honestly why I can’t consider this part of the bad era of SpongeBob SquarePants but more of the “awkward” era of it.

The Not So Best Day Ever

I don’t think you can discuss this era of SpongeBob SquarePants without addressing the elephant in the room. The elephant that pretty much exposed Nickelodeon’s cynicism for the show’s continuation throughout the years along with the cynical practices of hyping up certain main SpongeBob “events”. While it’s easy to see why Season 5 is hated, it’s difficult to understand the bad rep that Season 4 got. That is until you talk about…..The Best Day Ever marathon.

For anyone that is unaware, back in November of 2006, Nickelodeon hosted a SpongeBob-themed marathon titled The Best Day Ever. It was a 24-hour long marathon where the network would air the top 100 episodes of the sponge’s history, which all would be voted by fans. This would also include the premiere of the The Best Day Ever special episode along with the first ever TV airing of The SpongeBob SquarePants Movie. This was hands down the biggest event ever for SpongeBob SquarePants and perhaps even Nickelodeon. While the ratings were clearly high, the reception from fans was ANYTHING but.

This event could not have been more disastrous if it tried. You had episodes in the top 10 that didn’t even remotely feel like they belonged in the top 10, you had actual fan favorite episodes that were either very low on that top 100 list or not there at all, and you had this whole marathon capped out in the most underwhelmingly way possible. You had The Best Day Ever episode, which is probably the most average SpongeBob episode that’s ever been made, and it’s revealed that the episode that got the most votes as the best episode of SpongeBob SquarePants to that point was no other than…..Karate Island. I’m not even kidding about any of that!

This was an event that just had the word “rigged” written all over it. All that hype for the past 23 hours and 30 minutes just for one new episode that has SpongeBob doing all the things we have seen him do a million times before and for one episode that isn’t that well regarded that we were all suppose to accept was the best SpongeBob SquarePants episode ever. This was a ratings trapped at it’s finest and unfortunately would be the very for many more to come from Nickelodeon in regards to SpongeBob SquarePants.

It was basically this event that seemed to open the floodgates of criticism surrounding Season 4 and onwards of SpongeBob. Not just in terms of it’s overall quality but Nickelodeon’s treatment of the show itself. This is when they were clearly trying to take advantage of audiences and using the SpongeBob name itself in the hopes it would boast ratings and viewership for the show. This was the moment that Nick exposed themselves of using SpongeBob as a cash cow. And I likely tend to think this is when folks came to the realization of the post-movie era’s shortcomings. A realization that is still being talked about to this very day.

In Conclusion

Even speaking as someone that always likes to play both sides, I can totally understand each different viewpoints in regards to Seasons 4 and 5. There is plenty about both seasons that don’t work and largely led to the mindset that SpongeBob as a whole should have stopped after the original run. However, there is also plenty that does work and it’s those diamonds in the rough that make both seasons at least salvageable compared to some of the other very worst to come from the franchise.

If you want my opinion, I don’t hate either one of these seasons but I don’t quite love them either. There’s plenty I do hate and plenty I do love but it’s not consistent enough on either ends to where I can say this is up there with the first three seasons or down there with the next three seasons. It exists simply in that middle awkward spot within the history of SpongeBob SquarePants.

Following up the first three seasons of SpongeBob SquarePants was always going to be a difficult task. Without most of the creative folks that made the first three seasons as great and memorable as they are along with plenty of new blood involved, it was always destined to be a challenge for everyone involved. I hold no ill will to the creative team behind these two seasons as they had to have know they were going to face harsh criticism and be unfairly compared to the first three seasons.

Even speaking as someone that has grown tired of reappraisals of previously hated media and contrarian takes just for the sake of being contrarian, I’m totally cool with Season 4 and 5 being viewed in a much better light today. The good episodes in those seasons shouldn’t be discredited because of all the bad episodes that surround it. They were all the saving graces of otherwise inferior seasons of a television show. I don’t know if I would go as far to call these two seasons great but I I would also not go as far as to call them terrible either. That’s for the next era we will be discussing!

Next Month: The “Bad” Era (Seasons 6-8)

Also, Happy Easter Weekend!

Dune: Part Two (2024) Early Movie Review: Denis Villeneuve To The Rescue

February 26, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

There are times to where being a fan of cinema is difficult! There are times to where there are so many duds and whimpers that get released simultaneously that you wonder how much more you can take! How much time and money are you willing to spend to watch a motion picture that’s not even good enough to be a simple three out of four star flick! In the case of films kicking off in the first two months of 2024, I don’t think I can recall a year that has gotten off to such a worst start, so much so that the only film that I would give a solid three out of four star recommendation to is….Lisa Frankenstein of all things.

Night Swim started off 2024 with the exact OPPOSITE feeling I had walking out of 2023 with M3GAN, Mean Girls was a painfully mediocre musical that didn’t do it’s source material justice, Bob Marley One Love was a safe, disposable, by-the-numbers bio pic, The Beekeeper and Argylle had their moments but they got way more overly complicated than they had any right to be, and everyone knows how much of a trainwreck Madame Web was. There is also one movie that hurt me dearly that I can’t post my review of yet because I’m not sure I’m allow to because there’s been no review embargo for it thus far.

Suffice to say, movies quite suck right now, even for someone that tries to be as optimistic about them as possible. Thankfully, we have the great Denis Villeneuve here to safe us all with his outstanding follow-up to the very good Dune: Part One with Dune: Part Two, a film which by the way wasn’t even suppose to come out last year but got pushed back due to the strikes. Regardless of the timing of it’s release, Dune: Part Two is exactly what fans hoped it would be and so much more!

If Dune: Part One acted as Villeneuve setting the training wheels on his bike in motion, Dune: Part Two sees him being able to successfully take those training wheels off and pushed that bike down the hill with good graces. Nearly all that set up that amounted in Part One has immensely satisfying pay offs in Part Two, the action and set pieces are taking to a whole new level, every single member of it’s stacked cast get their moment to shine, and I can’t recall a film in recent memory that such stellar cinematography that it 100% makes the whole experience worth seeing in IMAX. This is an instant sci-fi classic that will likely go down as one of the best cinematic experiences that I along with others will have all throughout 2024.

Premise: Paul Atreides (Timothee Chalamet) unites with Chani and the Fremen while seeking revenge against the conspirators who destroyed his family. Facing a choice between the love of his life and the fate of the universe, he must prevent a terrible future only he can foresee.

What is made the most apparent about Dune: Part Two is how much Denis Villeneuve clearly understood the assignment with his second trip in the world of Dune. He knew exactly the plot threads that he had established in Part One that needed to have immense payoff in Part Two. With the first film taking the majority of it’s runtime to establish the lore, world building, and who these characters are, the second film shows you manages to deepen all of that and show you just everything that the world of Dune is capable off. That’s not to say that everything is tied up into a complete bow exactly by the time two and a half hours has flown by, but it’s clear the kind of story that Villeneuve left hanging in the last one is able to be continue and reached a definite conclusion in this one. This definitely makes for a perfect case as to why not only splitting Dune into two movies was actually justified but it also acted as a necessary evil.

I’m sure there will be plenty of folks claiming that Dune: Part Two is to Dune: Part One what The Empire Strikes Back was to the original Star Wars. While that is an 100% accurate comparison, it’s able to learn the “right” lessons from that game changing sci-fi masterpiece that came out in 1980. It’s not only bigger, better, and bolder than it’s predecessor because of how “dark” it is, but because it’s able to use an unconventional structure of storytelling to push all the right buttons on making a perfect sequel. Dune: Part Two is able to challenge it’s characters, expand upon the mythos and lore, and deliver the kind of visuals and set pieces in all the ways that the first one was unable to provide, while making for a completely mesmerizing and memorable theater experience in it’s own rights. It’s not trying to be overly dark for the sake of it, it’s just trying to stand out by pushing measures in filmmaking that only Dune: Part Two could ever provide.

Of course, we once again follow Paul Atreides, played perfectly by Timothée Chalamet, right where we left off in his journey from Part One. Still carried by all that burden from trying to avenge his father’s death and his family’s legacy from the Harkonnen, we see Paul being pushed beyond his measures to stop the conspirators from messing up his life and future even further. While he now has new allies with his new love in Chani and the Fremen, it’s ultimately himself that has to make the tough decisions throughout. Tough decisions that might put an end to the terrible future he constantly sees in his dreams but might come at the expense of those he loves and the overall fate of the universe.

It’s the type of conflict that Paul and the other characters have that makes each choice they make all the more intriguing. Similar to The Empire Strikes Back (I promise this is the last comparisons I will make with that), Dune: Part Two knows the best way to make the stakes more personal is to constantly put it’s own characters in constant peril throughout it’s entire runtime. After all, during a time of war, desperate times call for desperate measures. What you do in the short run could absolutely impact you in the best and worst ways in the long run.

Much like last year’s Oppenheimer, it’s incredible just how much the effort of the entire cast and crew working through the picture is clearly shown on the big screen. Once again, letting every single penny of it’s 100 million plus budget feel properly used on the big screen. This has easily one of the best, most talented, and quite frankly hottest talented ensembles for a film that I’ve ever seen. Regardless, of how big or small their roles are, they are all able to stand out in their own way.

While Timothée Chalamet was solid in Part One, he’s on a completely different level here, feeling much more free willing and unhinged in his performance. His screen presence is felt every single time he steps in front of the camera, giving the perfect kind of energy and depth needed to carry a picture with some of the best and most acclaimed actors surrounding him. A lot of that has to do with Part Two being able to explore that darker side with Paul as he is forced to make decisions as he takes his big steps into becoming a war leader, the decisions that he seemed unwilling to make in the first one. As much as Chalament nailed playing the typical pretty white boy role in the past, he is able to come to his own here as being an absolute movie star that can carry his own presence and even be great in action sequences. Between the commercial success of Wonka and the likely success of this, I would expect his agent’s phones are gonna be ringing like crazy come next Monday.

Making for the perfect equal to Chalamet’s Paul is Zendaya’s Chani. There’s a strong argument to make that she is basically the beating heart of the story. She not only has a role that feels much more expanded this time around but the arc that Chani goes through is the direct reflection of what Paul has, being put in a difficult place during war that may cost those they love for victory. She shares perfect chemistry with Chalamet and makes for one of the most compelling on-screen romances in recent memory. It honestly made me realize just how much I miss these kind of romance stories that don’t resonate much in most mainstream franchises today.

The rest of the returning cast of the first one are just as great to see again as before. Rebecca Ferguson continues to be a force to be reckoning with as she always is in every movie that she is in, Josh Brolin as Gurney takes a while to come into the picture but that energy that Brolin brings is still present, Dave Bautista as Glossu Rabban is giving more screen time than before, and Javier Bardem not only seems like he’s having the most fun out of everyone but he has surprisingly great comedic timing throughout the film. I could have used a bit more of Stellan Skarsgard as The Baron though.

In terms of the new players, they all own their own weight completely and fits perfectly along with the rest of the cast. Christopher Walken is completely buyable as the great Emperor of the film, being able to make the role more of his own than I imagine the character was in the books. Florence Pugh is equally great as the Emperor’s daughter, at times feeling like the narrator or guiding viewpoint of the antagonists of the film. Lea Seydoux, Souheila Yacoub, and Anya Taylor-Joy might not get as much screentime as some might expect but they absolutely sell their roles with the limited screen time they are given. The biggest stand out of the newcomer is Austin Butler as Feyd-Rautha. Butler kills every moment that he is given throughout the film, perfectly combing the mix of being charismatic, menacing, and an absolute blast to watch whenever he is on screen. As a matter of fact, there’s about a 15 to 20 minute period where the film focuses perfectly on him and took time away from the main character and I did not care one bit. That right there should tell you all you need to know about how awesome Butler is as a main bad guy of Feyd-Rautha.

From a technical component, words are not enough to describe how much of a beautifully crafted and well made film this is. There is not a single categories of filmmaking on display that is not worth a nomination for next year’s Oscars. The visuals are absolutely breathtaking with not a single flat shot to be found here, the sound design is impeccable and first perfectly with each individual scene, the editing is the exact definition of Oscar-calibar, each action set piece is treated with incredibly impressive fight choreography and jaw dropping sequences (the biggest stand outs being the first sequence in the desert, Feyd-Rautha’s ceremony introduction, and the final 45 minutes in general), and Hans Zimmer is even able to outdo himself with a score that is as captivating and chill-inducing as before.

While everyone on the creative team deserves all the credit in the world, a special shout-out has to be given to cinematographer Greig Fraser. Fraser has already done amazing work from behind the camera with the likes of Zero Dark Thirty, Rogue One, and The Batman but it’s his work in both of these two Dune movies that have stood out the most for me. These films would not be as good as they were if they were unable to let it’s visuals and imagery do the majority of the talking (and that’s not just because of Villeneuve’s recent “anti-dialogue” comments). After all, it’s the overall look and feel of the world of Dune itself that helps differentiate it from the rest of the sci-fi genre out there. Take that a way and these new Dune films would not be what they are. I know it’s early in 2024 but I would be shocked if I see a film that is as beautiful to look at as Dune: Part Two, which should make that Oscar a slam dunk for Mr. Fraser.

Dune: Part Two is just about as good as it could be regardless of any way you look at it. If you look at it as being the right follow-up to Part One that leaves seasonings for a possible third film with Dune: Messiah, you will get that. If you look at it as being the saving grace of 2024 in cinema thus far, you will get that. Heck, if you are just looking for a great sci-fi flick regardless of how it compares to other sci-fi flicks of it’s kind, you will get that as well.

There are certainly nits you can pick such as the first 15 minutes being a tad slow, some actors not getting as much time as you expect, and a wrap-up that doesn’t so much act as a definite end and more leaves an opening to Dune: Messiah. Even so, this is the cinema experience as it’s finest. The kind of experience that is fading away by each passing day. I don’t know if Dune: Part Two will act as the beginning of the end of cinema as we know it or the start of something more hopeful and uplifting for the future but no doubt, those that are excited for this upcoming picture will surely get their money’s worth.

Rock on, Denis Villeneuve! Just please provide less controversial takes for the near future, please!

Other comments:

Yeah, I don’t agree with Villeneuve’s comments on dialogue but I’m not gonna destroy him for it either. He just needs to be like Christopher Nolan and not let his ego get the better of him.

Austin Butler as sure come a long way from being that boyfriend character in Zoey 101 that no one liked to playing an antagonist that forces Drax the Destroyer to kiss his feet.

It really is impressive how more organic the pacing feels here compared to Part One. Even the slow moments didn’t feel as outrageously slow to me as they did in Part One.

And btw, I’m not joking about that prior point. Austin Butler literally forces Dave Bautista to kiss his feet and that is so satisfying to see. No offense to Drax!

I’m definitely curious to watching these two films back-to-back the way they were initially intended and see if the five and a half hour complete experience makes it all for the better.

And for those wondering, yes, Dune: Part One would have found a spot on my Best Movies of 2021 list from either the honorable mentions category or my main top 10. I still have my issues with the pacing but no doubt, it’s a great cinematic achievement with the kind of visuals and world building I always love for my sci-fi. Rock on again, Denis!

The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (2004) Retrospective

February 20, 2024February 21, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

Everybody’s favorite sponge arrived on the big screen for the first time ever on November 19th, 2004. It was directed by the creator of SpongeBob Squarepants himself, Stephen Hillenburg, who crafted the story alongside Derek Drymon, Tim Hill, Kent Osborne, Aaron Springer, and Paul Tibbitt. They decided to structure the story as a mythical hero’s journey that would put SpongeBob and Patrick front and center. The film was originally meant to serve as the series finale, as Hillenberg wanted to end the series on a high note and not have it wear out it’s welcome. However, because the series had become increasingly profitable and still having an insane amount of popularity, Nickelodeon ordered for more episodes after the film’s release and is still ordering them to this very day. As a result, Hillenburg resigned as the showrunner, with Tibbitt taking his place until 2015.

The movie received generally positive reviews from critics and is generally beloved by fans, many of whom found it to be a satisfying conclusion to the original run of SpongeBob Squarepants. It grossed 141 million dollars worldwide, becoming the seventh highest grossing animated film of 2004. There were two follow-ups to this film with Sponge Out of Water releasing in 2015 and Sponge on the Run in 2020 along with a fourth film that is in the works subtitled, Search for Squarepants, that is set for a release on December 19. 2025.

I’m not gonna lie, I can’t recall a film that I have had more nostalgia for in my ENTIRE life than The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie. This was the very first movie I remember ever seeing in a theater. I have watched this so many times as a kid and have nearly every single scene and line of dialogue memorized in my head. To tell you the truth, this might be one of my personal favorite movies. I’m not joking.

There is something about The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie that just feels so right, so earnest, so joyful, and so emotionally satisfying every single time that I watch it. It’s a movie that just works no matter which way you look at it. Not only does it make for a perfectly satisfying epilogue for fans of the series but it even works as a nice hero’s journey with a great, heartful message for kids, telling them that there’s nothing wrong with being who you are and never doubt yourself because of it. If you’re a kid, be a kid. Because at the end of the day, not only are we all a kid inside, we are also a goofy goober!

What makes this movie stand out bigger than not just the other SpongeBob movies but also other SpongeBob medium is the definite sense that this is the endgame. This seems like the one that has the desire to change up the status quo by the end and have all things come full circle for the characters and the franchise. The three main components in particular being about how a second Krusty Krab restaurant now exists, SpongeBob gaining a new promotion as manager, and of course, Plankton is FINALLY able to steal the Krabby Patty formula for once and fulfill his destiny to rule all of Bikini Bottom with everyone as his slaves. These were all major events that had never happened before in prior SpongeBob material and really feels like it could only happen in movie form. Even with the knowledge that this was not the fact where the series ended and is still going all these years later, you can’t help but think of this movie being the true finale to the story and that everything that has come after it is a prequel at best to this.

While the SpongeBob Squarepants series hasn’t necessarily been known for having the strongest storytelling and character development out there, this movie manages to make both measures better than it ever has been before with the series. Sure, the message that the film is trying to get across is an obvious one and there will likely be contrivances and deviance of logic to the plot if you were to dissect the film Cinema Sins-style but that’s all find and dandy because of how well executed SpongeBob and Patrick’s journey is but it’s also has a message that anyone of any age can relate to.

We have always had a moment in our lives where we doubt ourselves. Whether it’s due to our age, race, gender, sexuality, religion, etc., there will also be someone out there that will judge strictly based on simple, trivial merits such as the ones mentioned. Instead of letting others put you down for it, embrace it. Embrace who you are, inspire yourself to be the best version of yourself you can be, and be the first person to prove your doubters wrong. Use it as strength, not as a weakness. It’s only then where you will find yourself to not only be a kid inside as well, but also a goofy goober as well. Just like what SpongeBob and Patrick discover about themselves throughout their adventure.

Not only are SpongeBob and Patrick going on this journey to get King Neptune’s crown back to save the town and Mr. Krabs but also to discover who they truly are. They keep thinking they must be something they are not instead of being that something they really are deep inside. They insist they need to be the manliest of men with facial hair and a load of GRIT to get the job done. But that’s just not who they are. They are just a couple of goofballs who are only going on this adventure because they are the only ones in the sea that can possibly save the day. And you know what, they are all the better for it. It’s only at that moment where they embrace the fact that they are kids that they have 100% confidence in the world to get the job done.

Choosing to go with the mystical hero’s journey was a GENIUS move by the writing crew. They knew that in order for SpongeBob to work as a movie, there would need to be a fully layered plot that had a big increase on stakes, arcs, emotion, and a hard-earned message at it’s core. Is it the most complex story ever told? No! Does the arcs that SpongeBob and Patrick go through are quite predictable? Sure! Is the overall message a bit cheesy? Absolutely! But you know what, for SpongeBob Squarepants, that is literally all you need to make it all work perfectly. Even if that doesn’t make for a perfect film overall, it makes for a perfect SpongeBob film.

To be sure, while there is definitely more effort put into its plot and character development than most Spongebob media, it never forgets the elements that makes the series as great as it is. It’s still an EXTEREMELY funny movie with the same style of humor, gags, and amusing visuals that the series has always been known for. It’s able to expand upon the world of undersea than ever before, it moves at a solid, breakneck pace, the new characters are great and iconic in their own right, the music is still soothing, the voice acting is perhaps at it’s most energetic, and it never once forget the overall charm of what the show has stood for. Hillenburg and friends could not have done a better job for adaptation SpongeBob onto the big screen if they tried.

Were there some missed opportunities here? Perhaps! As much as I love the focus on strictly Spongebob and Patrick, it does feel unfortunate that other characters don’t seem to get much of the spotlight, most notably fan favorites such as Gary, Squidward and Sandy Cheeks. Considering the fact this movie was originally structured as the series finale, it does seem odd that these characters didn’t get a special moment to themselves or be able to share their thoughts one last time about SpongeBob at the very end.

I also find it jarring how the movie seems to forget about Patrick once we get to the climax where SpongeBob goes full DEUS EX GOOFY GOOBER mode! The movie puts so much focus on the starfish, practically making him the co-lead of the picture, and then it like…forgets he exists by the very end. The very last scene we get of Patrick is him with his long sneezy legs getting SpongeBob down from the ceiling.

Do these flaws hinder my enjoyment or has me thinking this isn’t a perfect four out of four star movie for me? Not at all! But I would imagine that there would at least be one hardcore fan that would have wished a bit more love was given to some of the other characters here! I guess they would have to wait for the next movie for them to get their time in the spotlight.

The SpongeBob Squarepants Movie still remains an all-time classic in my eyes. Regardless of whether you view this as an adaption of the show, the epilogue of a beloved franchise, or even just a standard kids film, it all works in every way it possibly can. Even if the clear target audience is for kids, I do think there is something for adults to get something out of this as well. The message of the film is just that resonating. Beautifully animated, perfectly written, immensely funny, and emotional beats that all feel earned (You are a robot sent from Skyler if you didn’t cry at SpongeBob and Patrick’s “death scene”!), I could not ask for a better SpongeBob movie than this.

Even as someone that’s about to turn 27 this year, I can’t help but have a strong attachment to this film as I get older. When rewatching it for this marathon, I was legit worried that I wasn’t going to feel that same fondness when watching this film as a kid, that it was just nostalgia that clouded my judgement and it was time to take the rose-colored glasses off with the acceptance that this movie simply wasn’t as good as I thought it was. However, watching it again, I was wrong to ever doubt it. Because in the end, we are all goofy goobers. No matter what age I am, I will always feel proud to call myself a goofy goober!

Even though this did not end up being the very last of the series like it was originally intended to, this still works perfectly as a definite end to the franchise. Despite the fact that multiple seasons and films involving Spongebob have come along since 2004, it doesn’t change the fact that the timeless nature of it makes this feel like the main stopping point and everything that came after basically just what came before chronologically. It’s the way that Stephen Hillenburg always intended and quite frankly, it works all the better for it.

Tune in next month as to when things start getting “interesting” as we will take a look at what can be considered the “awkward” era of Spongebob Squarepants, with Seasons 4 and 5 respectively!

Other thoughts:

I still find it hard to believe that Black Widow herself, Scarlett Johansson, did the voice of Mindy. It’s no wonder Patrick had a big crush on her.

It’s sad we never got to see Mindy in a big role throughout the rest of the series.

I also remember playing the movie tie-in video game a lot as a kid. Boy, do I have complicated feelings about that game.

It’s only until now that I realized that Best Day Ever song was originally a part of this movie’s soundtrack and NOT for the Best Day Ever episode.

Now, That We’re Men is gonna be playing in my head rent free for the next month.

The guy that played Patchy the Pirate in this movie was great btw.

I do wonder who voiced Dennis though. Surely, it’s just some no name actor that disappeared off the face of the earth because he decided acting wasn’t his thing and didn’t do something utterly terrible that destroyed his life. I will still stick by the fact that Dennis is voiced by “He who shall NOT be named!”

Lastly, David Hasselhoff, BEST CELEBRITY CAMEO EVER!

Next Month: The “Awkward” Era (Seasons 4 and 5)

Madame Web (2024) Movie Review- A Madame Webbing Time

February 14, 2024February 15, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

Here we go again, ladies and gentlemen! Time for another installment in the HOTTEST cinematic universe going on at the movie, the S(cam)ony Villain Cinematic Universe! It started off with a BANG with the turd in the wind that was Venom, followed with Venom: Let There Be Carnage which lived up to the promise of the post credits where Woody Harrleson said, “When I get out of here and I will, there’s gonna be CARNAGE!!!!“, and then came Morbius which offered one absolutely MORBIN TIME that had audiences stand and cheer in the theaters all around the world. Finally, we have Madame Web and as it’s title suggests, it’s the ultimate MADAME WEBBING EXPEREINCE!

Sure, the plot itself might be relatively non-existent, relying on the most unlikely coincidences, multiple continuity errors, bizarre contrivances, and absolute defiance of actual logic imaginable. Sure, it might contain some of the sloppiest and incoherent editing that you will likely see all year. Sure, the action might be very poor, with a climax that is so tense that you can’t even see what the f*ck is happening onscreen. Sure, it has a talented cast that could not look more embarrassed to be there and have been crapping all over this movie throughout their entire press tour. Sure, it feels like a superhero movie that came out in 2003 (which is the actual year which this movie is set in). And sure, the biggest line of the trailer, “He was in the Amazon with my mom when she was researching spiders right before she died,” isn’t even in the damn movie at all. However, there is no other movie out there that is will give you a more MADAME WEBBING experience than this MADAME WEBBING masterwork!

I would go into the plot itself but considering the fact that it’s basically the plot of every Final Destination movie every and about every “chase” movie imaginable, it’s relatively pointless too. However, the big important thing here is the way that Madame Web MASTERFULLY ties into Sony’s Cinematic Universe. First off, it answers the two BIGGEST questions that EVERYONE has always had about Spider-Man! 1.) What was Uncle Ben doing in his years as a hot paramedic? and 2.) What happened the night that Peter Parker’s mother Mary, gave birth to him? I know that I was always wanting the answer to those questions and thankfully, the film answers that in a way that is so dumb that it’s secretly brilliant. The LAYERS this film has are just something else!

We of course have to get into the four leading women carrying the picture! They could not have had more perfect chemistry if they even tried. Even though the ways they are connected with each other is probably some of the biggest coincidences I’ve ever seen in an motion picture with relationship dynamics that make little to no sense (Mattie is angry as Anya for literally no reason throughout the entire movie!), it’s something so refreshing to see so many women leading a superhero flick! Sure, The Marvels was….okay I guess but Madame Web is really how a female-lead superhero film is suppose to be! You just let them work out their girl powers (No pun intended!) and let them kick ass in ways that are incoherent and hard to follow on screen. And unlike The Marvels which was a huge bomb, Madame Web is for sure set to make MADAME WEBBING DOLLARS!

And unlike say that woke Suicide Squad game that made me not want to wank off to Harley Quinn and Wonder Woman, Madame Web actually lets the ladies show off a little screen. With their nice hair, skin tight outfits, and absurd amount of make up that makes them look like models (despite them all suppose to be teenage girls that are really played by girls in their 20s), this is definitely a female-led movie that’s made for guys. After all, women in superhero media aren’t suppose to be their own fleshed out characters who have their own goals, personalities, and superpowers, they only exist to be in interest of men and men alone. Let women have Barbie! Way to know your audience, Sony!

Of course, this is all Dakota Johnson’s movie as it’s suppose to be considering well..it is a Madame Web movie that tells the origin story of Madame Web. I will warn you though, it’s an INCREDIBLY slow burn where nothing much happens and you’ll likely find yourself as half awake that Dakota Johnson looks in the entire movie. You get every single detail about Cassie Webb in her early days as a hot paramedic, right down to spending time with her cat and how she absurdly got her powers. Although, it doesn’t revolve around the Amazon with her mom when she was researching spiders right before she died, it does take it’s time to show off the same superpower over and over and over again because the writers can’t seem to think of any other clever way to show off her powers. It does require your patience but I promise you the whole ten seconds of her in that ICONIC red suit at the VERY end of the movie is all worth it.

And speaking of which, this movie does SUCH a good job as fleshing out these female characters that you don’t even notice that they aren’t even in their Spider-Women costumes for 99.999999% of the movie. From my estimate, the ladies have about as much screentime in their superHERoine outfits as Taylor Swift did in the Super Bowl, which was a mere 54 seconds btw. Even though the whole purpose of a superHERoine origin story is seeing them turn into a superHERoine at least by the half way point, this cleverly keeps it as minimum as possible, leaving the audience want more from the future. After all, as the good old saying goes, LESS is MORE! And you could have not done MORE with LESS than with this movie.

A big credit has to go to writing duo of Matt Sazama and Burk Sharpless. Coming high off their MORBIN masterpiece that was Morbius, they somehow are able to top themselves here! They manage to come up with a script that feels like the most sloppy first copy of a draft imaginable, almost like the equivalent of writing things on the fly, and have it feel as disjointed of a film that I’ve ever seen. It’s GENIUS writing if I’ve ever seen one! This is the kind of duo that should be an inspiration to screenwriters everywhere! Because now you know you can have a script that has no coherent storyline or consistent character motivations in order to get a movie made!

We also have to get credit to S.J. Clarkson, making her directional film debut. Sure, she might have directed some okay episodes of Jessica Jones and The Defenders but she REALLY brought her A-game here. That might have to do with the fact that the film at large feels like a two-hour pilot for a television series that will likely NEVER see the light of day. With the way the low 80 million dollar budget is painfully on screen, how it has so many forced tie-ins at such a brisk pace, and how by the end, it leaves plenty of plot elements up in the air for future entries to continue upon, she could not have been a better choice for Sony. She was able to make a film that stood strictly on it’s own that it didn’t even need a post credit scene to justify it’s existence. Take notes, Disney and Marvel!

The cinematography is stunning with so much visual imagery that dives deeply into Cassie’s self conscious and her powers, the editing feels incredibly ADHD and feels more like it was edited by folks who do trailers rather than movies, the action is all over the place and sloppy like it’s main characters are, and the score is so one note you could swear that Johan Söderqvist was half awake the entire time composing it. And unlike other superhero flicks, it actually spares most of the CGI and saves it for it’s intense climax, with effects that look about as fake and green screen than any movie that I’ve seen in quite some time. An absolute A effort for everyone involved.

In conclusion, Madame Web truly lives up to it’s title and makes for a Madame Webbing time at the theaters. It’s so astonishing that it leaves me anxious to see where this ill-fated and not thought out at all cinematic universe is going. More importantly, which Spider-Man universe is this suppose to connect in? It was suppose to be Andrew Garfield but no one liked that whiny brat in the Amazing Spider-Man movies so pass. It was suppose to be Tom Holland until Sony realized that would make NO logical sense for this to take place in the MCU, so much so that they had to rewrite the entire script while shooting. And with the way Peter Parker is born in this movie, it leaves the room for ANOTHER Spider-Man to join this universe in the future.

Even so, we got Kick-Ass/the inferior Quicksilver coming up as Kraven the Hunter in August and Bane/Mad Max in Venom 3 coming out in October. There’s PLENTY of content we have left to get through before the inevitable Sinister Six movie happens and Sony makes up their mind on whatever Spider-Man they want to join this universe. With this cinematic universe clearly not slowing down any time soon, I think Marvel Studios and DC should be taking notes here. This is how you do a cinematic universe!

Madame Webbing Web made for one Madame Webbing time and I can’t wait to see this film madame webbing again.

This is an easy four out of stars for me! Move over Dune Part II and Deadpool III, THIS is the movie of 2024!

Happy Valentine’s Day to you all! Especially you, Sony! Keep up the madame webbing work!

Thanks for checking out my review! I sure hope it was as sloppy and all over the place as this entire film was!

Real thoughts:

This movie is undoubtedly the most fascinating mess of a movie that I’ve seen in quite some time, feeling more like a POC than an actual feature film. It’s certainly more competently made than say….Morbius but it feels as ever bit as much of an obligation to make as that. I might have to make a piece on this soon but after Beyond the Spider-Verse, Sony really needs to give the film rights of Spider-Man back to Marvel. These villain movies are becoming more and more nonsensical by the day. It’s clear that audiences don’t want to see them as much as Sony doesn’t want to make them! So, stop doing it, please!

Maybe a one and a half out of four stars if I’m being generous.

Probably will change it to one out of four stars once I sleep on it though!

Also, this is still the GOAT Madame Web btw!

Oh, and Happy Valentine’s Day!

Spongebob Squarepants (Seasons 1-3) Retrospective: The Golden Era

January 28, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

If you were to ask what particular television show had a huge impact on my specific generation, formally known as Generation Z, the answer you will likely get more times than not is Spongebob Squarepants. I would be hard pressed to think of a show that came out in the 2000s that hadn’t been remembered, talked about, beloved, hated, dissected, and especially MEMED to death! While there are plenty of shows now and then that have those kind of impacts, there’s something about Spongebob Squarepants that hits a bit differently.

On the surface, it seems like a very basic premise. What if you followed someone throughout their everyday life where they work, play around, and hang out with their friends and family? The main core difference here is that instead of it being in the human world or another planet, it takes place strictly underwater. That right there leaves plenty of room for a show to have plenty of creative world building, neat visuals, and a tons of creative and funny jokes! And for the universal praise that this show has gotten since it started back in 1999 is anything to go by, I would say that Spongebob Squarepants was able to utilize that familiar but different premise to it’s absolute fullest potential.

However, there is one specific era that is referred to as the absolute golden era for Spongebob Squarepants. That era is of course the first three seasons of the show, which basically acted as the original run for this series. This was when the creator of the show Stephen Hillenberg (May he rest in peace!) had complete control along with creative director, Derek Drymon, that acted as the main showrunner of this show and would later go on to be a part of the writing team of the first two films along with being the head director of the upcoming fourth film, Search for Squarepants. Needless to say, these two teaming up along with a handful of credited writers were able to make something truly special for this show’s original run.

Everyone has their own different opinions of Spongebob Squarepants post-original era but no doubt, you will never hear anyone say a bad word about this show in regards to it’s first three seasons. Even to this day, you plenty of folks that remember, quote, and meme episodes of these three seasons to death, which goes to show the everlasting impact this show has gotten over the past 25 years. Because of all of that and more, what better way to kick off this marathon than discussing what is considered by many to be the “golden era” of Spongebob Squarepants, the first three seasons.

Season 1

Now, I will admit, I do find Season 1 to be the weakest of these first three seasons. It’s the one which the animation has shown it’s age, the pacing feels the slowest, it’s much more “quiet” in terms of it’s sound, and this is also when the voice actors were going through their “growing pains” to get comfortable in their roles that they would end up be voicing for over the next two decades. That being said, this still does make for about as good of a first season for the show as you could imagine.

This is when we get introduced to the characters we would all come to love. You have the main character of Spongebob Squarepants, his best friend Patrick Star, his next door neighbor Squidward Tenacles, his other friend he meets Sandy Cheeks, his boss Mr. Krabs, his pet snail Gary, his boat teacher Mrs. Puffs, his boss’s arch nemesis Plankton along with plenty of others. Regardless of how big or small of a role they would end up playing in any individual episodes, there’s is always a certain trait or even a line that one of them says that makes them stand out on their own and become a fan favorite of some sort.

You have Spongebob always aims to be positive and upbeat, Patrick is lovably dumb, Squidward is depressed and moopy in a way that’s funny but also immensely relatable, Sandy is super smart and an absolute butt kicker, Mr. Krabs is always money hungry, Mrs. Puffs is a stress-filled teacher, Plankton is the arch rival that always finds himself on the losing end. Whether it’s their specific personality or they are so funny or they are just feel relatable, the characters of Spongebob are full of charm and memorability that it’s part to pick which one is your absolute favorite because they all have their great traits to them. Even Patchy the Pirate, a pirate who happens to be Spongebob’s #1 fan and Tom Kenny, the voice of Spongebob himself, and his pet parrot Potty, get plenty of laughs in the earlier season in their live-action bits, despite these almost ALWAYS falling flat with animated shows.

When it comes to the world building, they do enough to where it feels much more different than what it would feel like in the real world with humans or even on another planet with aliens. While it certainly doesn’t make 100% logical sense and certainly doesn’t go too deep into the “rules” of how this world operates, this is always a fun and interesting universe to spend time in and is always interesting to put your shoes with these characters and see how you yourself would act if you got to live at the bottom of the ocean.

The plots of the episodes themselves tend to be light hearted and very simple while relying mostly on it’s humor and visuals to tell it but that’s okay since the show is based around those exact elements and is able to deliver on those fronts when it counts the most. Even every now and then, there will comes an episode that has a strong moral to it that anyone of any age can get something out of it. Take the end of the episode, Ripped Pants, where Spongebob performs a song which reflects the general message of that episode. That message being learn to be yourself in front of ones you care about and not be someone you are not. Otherwise, you’ll end up like the sponge who ripped his pants in this episode. It’s nice, direct messages like that which is always springled throughout this series that helps make these stories stand out well, even if it’s not the most complex writing ever.

That of course, should also talk about the sound and audio of the series which helps gives the show it’s own unique personality. While it’s not quite as strong here as it is with the other two seasons as it does feel more one-note in comparison, it’s the kind of music that’s always catchy, relaxing, lives rent free in your mind, and always feels appropriate for the Spongebob show and character. It’s the kind of music that whenever you listen to a piece from it, you almost ALWAYS know it’s from Spongebob Squarepants.

Even if I do think this is the weakest of the first three seasons since it at times gives off the impression of everybody involved in the cast and crew getting their foot in the door, it still contains that sort of heart and charm that makes the best episodes of this show stand out completely well on their own. There’s plenty of well-loved episodes here such as Bubblestand, Ripped Pants, Pizza Delivery, Opposite Day, Fools in April, and the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy episodes. If I had to pick a favorite, it would probably be either Ripped Pants and Pizza Delivery. Ripped Pants has the most wholesome message of any episode in this season and Pizza Delivery is Spongebob at his absolute wackiest and funniest. Regardless of this being my least favorite of the first three, it was more than good enough for Nickelodeon to greenlight a second season.

Season 2

Now, here’s a season that’s better than the first one in just about any way and may possible even be the very best season in the entire show. This was when you can tell that everyone on board this show were sitting fully comfortable in their square pants and came into work everyday just knowing what roles they are set to play. The animation is much better, the characters are more organic, fleshed out, and move more fluidly, the humor is even more hilarious, the pacing is more breakneck, and the overall world that is the Bikini Bottom feels more like it’s own character than ever before.

This is where most of the absolute fan favorite episodes came to be! You got classics such as Graveyard Shift, Squidville, Christmas Who?, Shanghaied, The Fry Cook Games, and Sailor Mouth. And of course, who can’t forget what is considered by many to be the very best episode on the show, Band Geeks! Like, if you tell me you never laughed at any of the jokes or quoted any one of the lines in this episode, you are a LIAR! And you are ESPECIALLY a liar that you don’t remember this episode for the iconic song, Sweet Victory, that plays at the very end of the episode! That episode along with plenty others in Season 2 is a perfect representation of this show at it’s absolute best.

Just like the first season, you also got a handful of episodes that have a solid moral at it’s core, teaching kids everyday lessons that they ought to learn. The biggest example being Procrastination, the episode where Spongebob is trying to do EVERYTHING but complete his essay. It’s a great examination on the dangers of procrastination, how simple distractions and laziness can prevent you from getting your homework done if you allow it to. Sure, it ends with the assignment being pointless because Mrs. Puffs cancelled it but that still doesn’t change the fact that you need to get work done when you can and never try to push it aside whenever you can. Of course, not all episodes are like that with plenty of humor and lighthearted writing to carry it but it’s another indication that this is not a simply “mindless” show that nowadays relies on memes to carry it. The majority of these episodes are classics for a reason and there’s a reason why they still resonate in the mind of so many who grew up with Spongebob.

Regardless of what Spongebob character is your favorite and what kind of Spongebob material is your favorite, Season 2 should MORE than satisfy you on every level. Each main Spongebob characters get their own episodes and moments to shine, the art design and animation is much improved and possibly better than ever, the humor is at it’s funniest, and it’s able to move at it’s own steady pace without every wearing out it’s welcome. Whether you are a kid whose looking for an entertaining cartoon or a parent/guardian/older sibling who is “forced” to watch it with their kids, there is plenty for anyone to enjoy about the second season of Spongebob Squarepants. This is when the training wheels were completely off and everyone on the cast and crew were ready to ride their bikes full throttle. And man, did they prove that whatsoever with Season 2!

Season 3

Season 3 was no doubt able to end the last of the original run of Spongebob Squarepants on a high note. It’s able to keep that consistent and quality level of humor, charm, and morals throughout with it’s characters still being endearing and Bikini Bottom still being a fascinating place to visit. If there is one thing holding it back compared to Season 2 had to do with the amount of interference that Nickelodeon had on the show and the bizarre airings of it.

To start off with the second point, many of the episodes of Season 3 were aired out of order from their original release slate. As a matter of fact, they started airing episodes of this season even before airing all episodes of Season 2. Nickelodeon has always had that weird habit of releasing episodes whenever the heck they want (Just ask Jimmy Neutron and Danny Phantom!) and that certainly applies here. It’s just stupid and Nickelodeon is stupid for that.

And speaking of stupid things, there was also some bizarre censoring of certain episodes from Season 3 that was done by the network’s part. There was the infamous bit in Mid-Life Crustacean where Spongebob, Patrick, and Mr. Krabs are going through a women’s underwear drawer, which so happened to belong to Mr. Krabs’ mother. That episode was removed from rotation in 2018 until it was added back in on Paramount Plus due to a glitch until it was removed again. There was also a bit in Just One Bite where Squidward is trying to get into the Krusty Krab to snatch more Krabby Patties from himself but gets caught in a gas explosion trap twice and blows up both times. That bit was removed due to it feeling too reminiscent of 9/11…..for some reason. I don’t know any sane individual that thought of the World Trade Center blowing up during that scene but it was a thing. It’s nothing that bugged me too much but it certainly were things that fell off-putting now in retrospect.

There’s also the fact that this season doesn’t really have a definite final episode. Granted, that’s because the true original finale of the series was suppose to be with The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (which we will discuss next month) but having no real finale for the televisions series feels rather bizarre. If the movie weren’t a thing, the very last thing we would ever see of the show is Spongebob and Patrick being exposed butt naked in front of everyone at the Krusty Krab. Not to mention, how the last two episode segments made it’s way to VHS and DVD first before television. I know that because I saw those two episodes first on DVD at my cousin’s house before then. Keep in mind, none of these problems I mentioned are deal breakers or ruin my enjoyment of the show but those are things that just stick out for me if I had to nitpick.

Even taking those things out of the way, Season 3 is still very good overall. It too contains some of my absolute favorite episodes from the series such as Nasty Patty, Krab Borg, Chocolate With Nuts, The Camping Episode, and The Krusty Krab Training Video. This is also strangely the season where I happened to see the most memes off the show out of them all for some bizarre reason. I can only tell you how many times I’ve seen the meme from sports fans whenever a team chokes than the one where the health inspector is choking on a fly while Spongebob and Mr. Krabs are laughing their balls off.

While I do think Season 2 is a snatch better, I do think this is definitely the best of the first three seasons in terms of animation, character designs, art style, and especially voice work. I don’t think there was more range in any scene of this show from Tom Kenny when Spongebob is going on his rant to Mr. Krabs about how much Squidward is driving him crazy in Can You Spare a Dime? If that’s not proof about how talented that man is at voice acting, then I don’t know what is. Everything that worked about the prior seasons works just as well here, even if the interference from Nick itself and a underwhelming special or two (Ugh! is just…..nothing!) did start to show the cracks on the armor with this once untouchable series.

Even so, had the show ended with Season 3 the way it was originally visioned too by Stephen Hillenburg himself, it would have been a good note to go out on. Of course, due to their being a Spongebob movie on the rise along with Nick not ready to put away the Spongebob toys yet due to the character’s insane popularity, the show did continue with Season 4 and onwards. Despite all of that, Season 3 was basically the end of the original run of the show and it certainly ended that run with good graces.

In Conclusion

It’s hard to say things about the first three seasons of Spongebob Squarepants that hasn’t been said already by everyone else on the planet. It’s the perfect example of capturing lightning in a bottle. It does everything that it’s suppose to do right. The characters are lovable and memorable, the world building is unique and inventive, the jokes comes thick and fast with very little that miss, the music is classic and pleasant on the ears, and there are enough morals to enough episodes that helps make it just more than mindless children entertainment.

When going back to these seasons many years later, it’s easy to understand why this series has had the lasting appeal that is has had. When it comes to animation that is great for kids and families that works as a simple comfort show or one to watch for the wacky visuals and humor, there’s not very many out there that can top Spongebob Squarepants. Even if not every single episode is a perfect 10/10 and the “special” episodes don’t necessarily feel “special” but more like two 11-minute long episodes crammed into one 22-minute long episode, there’s not a single moment throughout these first three seasons that feels wrong for the universe this show takes place in and the tone that it’s going for with each episode.

Although the first three seasons are considered the original run of the show, there is at least one other thing that came out shortly after the third season ended. One thing that basically acted as an epilogue for this run of Spongebob Squarepants and even at one point was considering the true ending of the show. That, of course, is The Spongebob Squarepants Movie. The next thing we will be talking about next month for this yearly-long Spongebob marathon.

2024 Update

January 1, 2024 AdamLeave a comment

Hey everybody! I hope you all have a fabulous Christmas and are currently have a fabulous New Years as well! I decided to take the time to go over a couple of things and give you all a sneak preview of what to expect in 2024.

First off, I did find another job last year in September. It’s mostly a part-time job but a job all the shame. That made my time to release more content on here much more limited than before but I still believe I was able to get a decent amount of content out on a good pace. Looking into 2024, I am looking to take one step further and pursue more of a full-time job, whether that involves writing or not, so I can give myself an indication as to where my head is at in the future. I’m at the point in my life where I feel like I need to take a leap of faith and decides for myself who I truly am and what I want to be defined as for the rest of my life. I don’t know where that will lead me or even if it leads anywhere at all but I’m intrigued to find out all the same.

Secondly, as I mention in doing all my mini-reviews for Wonka, Aquaman 2, and Rebel Moon last month that I took a little break from reviewing movies from the last two months of the year. This is mostly because of the lack of ambition I had for reviewing certain movies due to the amount of toxic discourse surrounding it, most notably The Marvels, and just the mere fact that I legit forgot about the movies near moments after I saw it, most notably Wish. No joke, I wanted to give Wish some time to sit to let my thoughts sink in but almost a day later, I COMPLETELY forgot all about that movie where I couldn’t make a review even if I wanted to. I was eager to do a review of Godzilla: Minus One but by the time I saw it and got motivate to do a review, it felt like an old story where I felt like I might as well just wait until my best of the year list to talk about it. It was mostly those reasons I mention why I didn’t feel compelled to make any more movie reviews for the rest of the year.

Heading into 2024, I think I might limit the amount of reviews I do in terms of movies and video games. There will be some from time-to-time without a doubt but not as much as there was in the past two years. As I’ve mentioned in my recent piece talking about whether or not the theatrical experience is dead, going to the movies is more expensive than ever before. Because of that, I really only feel compelled to go to the theater if it involves a film I’m either VERY interested in or I truly believe I’m going to enjoy. The rest I either wait to come out on digital, streaming, or even just watch a bootleg version of it online. I will still likely do the biggest movies of the year and some smaller ones that I feel are overlooked but just don’t expect a review on the latest movie of every week. Because of my Regal theater closing and Marcus Theaters not having any subscriptions on par with Regal Unlimited, I can’t be wasting money on movies I know are going to be crap or just mid at best. I don’t have the tolerance or financial support for that.

When it comes to video games, I was actually playing to do a list of my favorite video games of 2023 because of how good of a year for gaming it is for most people out there. However, there are still a handful of games that I have that I haven’t beaten yet. This includes games like Mortal Kombat 1, Resident Evil 4, Star Wars: Jedi Survivor, and Final Fantasy XVI. I wanted to find a way to beat those games by the time 2023 ended but that just wasn’t possible. Too much time involving work and the holidays made that impossible for me. Plus, when I’m playing games, I want to be able to have fun during it and play at my own pace without feeling like I have to rush through them just for the sake of getting a list on time. Video games that much more time to complete and write about than movies so making a best games of year list by New Years Eve just couldn’t happen. I do plan on getting a list out sometime this year, hopefully at least by May or June, but I make no promises.

I should also mention that I’m thinking of holding off the list because of me waiting for the update on Marvel’s Spider-Man 2. Looking back on my review, I think I overhyped the game too much because that game has not sat as well with me as I was expecting it would. That’s not to say I turned on it completely like the majority of the internet has. It’s still a great game and one of my favorites of the year but there were flaws I refused to point out in that review, most likely because I was caught up in the hype train. I do plan on doing an update piece on the update comes along with the New Game Plus mode and other added features that is set to come with it. I then will give my scores on the game pre-update and post-update along with figuring out where that should go on my best games of year list.

One more thing when it comes to games, I have been debating whether or not I should buy and review Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League once it comes out next month. I do have an updated check coming for the blog and I plan to use that money to purchase the game and then do a review on it, as a means of paying off my Batman: Arkham marathon I did last year. But considering all the discourse and controversy that game has gotten along with it’s development history, I just don’t know if I should be wasting 70 bucks on a game that is more likely to be bad than good. I’m sure that would make for an entertaining review for you guys but unless that review gets a ton of views and increase my ad revenue big time, I don’t know if it’s gonna be worth the time, effort, or money to do so. It’s a possibility but not a guarantee just yet.

When it comes to sports and other topics, I did have a piece in the works of the massive contracts that the Dodgers are paying Shohei Ohtani and Yoshinobu Yamamoto and how it has basically broken baseball forever. But again, that got lost in the shuffle due to a bunch of other things that was happening last month. Plus, I did the one with the Blues and firing Craig Berube because that was a more personal piece for me because of my connection to that team and organization. Those are getting harder to do for me because of how bad my main sports teams have gotten over the year but I’ll do my best to get a piece or two around sports every once in a while. I might do a NFL playoff predictions piece like I did last year before it starts. Be on the look out for that!

Lastly, there’s a special new marathon that I have been thinking about doing that will likely be a yearly long thing. It’s from a long running franchise that turns 25 years old this year and holds a special place in my heart! I will make an announcement of what that is tomorrow and how and when I plan to release every piece of that month by month. That should be a very exciting project, easily the biggest that I’ve worked on for this blog.

And that’s basically it. Although I am working a fully paid job once again and even have plans on other personal projects that may or may not become a big thing in the future, I still plan on providing you guys and girls plenty of content for this blog in 2024. I will try to stick to my planned schedule of at least two to three articles a week and hope I can keep that same sense of urgency throughout the majority of 2024. With the next few pieces, expect the announcement of what the next marathon on here will be along with my most anticipated movies of 2024.

Thanks to everyone who follows or even is just able to click on this blog whenever they get the chance you get! You guys and girls mean so much to me and it’s always nice to know that I have an audience out there on the internet that care about what I have to write!

I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas and I wish you all a very safe and happy 2024!

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