With Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League now out, why not rank it among the other installments in the Batman: Arkham gaming series, since it has been confirmed canon to that same universe whether we all like it or not.
I don’t think it’s hyperbole to say that this is probably considering the best superhero gaming franchise out there with the possible exception being Insomniac’s Spider-Man series. This is a series that not just revolutionized the character of Batman to a new generation but superhero triple A games in general. And the fact that these games are still being talked about and played to this very day despite beginning 15 years ago, with the latest installment coming nine years after the previous one, just goes to show you the impact and pure staying power that these games have had.
A big disclaimer here, I’m only doing games that were released on the main consoles and are generally considered the main series installments. I was considering trying to secure a copy of Batman: Arkham Origins Blackgate and Batman Arkham VR before doing this list but a.) I couldn’t find the charger for my Nintendo 3DS and b.) I couldn’t find a PlayStation VR that was super cheap. So because of that, those games will be off the list.
This will cover the four main series Batman: Arkham games along with the newest addition, Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League. Let’s get right down to it!
5.) Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League
Do I have the hate boner for this game that the majority of the internet has? Not really. Does that mean this game was worth the near decade long wait from Rocksteady? Again, not really. Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League feels like a game that was basically doomed from the start. Not just because this was a game nearly a decade in the making and following Rocksteady’s previous track record with their successful Batman: Arkham games but it was basically by design made to chase the worst kind of trends in modern gaming imaginable. It certainly does it better than most (at least compared to the likes of say Marvel’s Avengers) but like most, it’s own restrictions holds it back for it’s true potential.
It may get the job done by offering a typical action and shoot-them-up game for the Overwatch and Fortnite crowd, and at least has the decency to make the majority of content free (if not free to use offline) but it really doesn’t bother to be anything much else, which goes against what Rocksteady had stood for years now. The plot feels more like a 12-year old’s “What if?” edge lord fan-fiction than it does as being a true continuation of the Arkhamverse, giving the clear indication that this is only in the Arkham name for the sake of boosting sales rather than because anyone thought this truly belong in the same canon.
Yes, the upcoming seasonal content could fix the majority of the complaints and have this game get a resurgence later on down the road (similar to EA’s Star Wars Battlefront 2) but the fact we might have to wait over a year to get all of that says more about this game chasing trends for the sake of chasing trends and not much else. I don’t know whether this was Rocksteady or Warner Bro’s doing but both are capable of much more than this. Is it at least a playable game? Sure! Is it the weakest of this entire series? Without a shadow of a doubt!
4.) Batman: Arkham Origins
For years, Batman: Arkham Origins had the reputation of being the black sheep of the Arkham games. Nothing but the forgotten step child of the bunch and some even like to pretend doesn’t exist. On the surface, it’s easy to see why. This is the only one of the main four Arkham games to NOT be developed by Rocksteady, it doesn’t have the legendary Kevin Conroy and Mark Hamill in their roles as Batman and Joker respectively, and was basically the one that acted the most as a “filler” game that was basically made to buy time between the releases of Arkham City and Arkham Knight. There were also multiple reports of bugs and glitches that plagued the game for most people, which I was NOT one of them. However, when looking at the game itself now time has past and updates of the game have been made, Arkham Origins is actually a really damn good game in it’s own right and is highly underrated.
The gameplay is as fluid and fun as it is in the other Arkham games, the addition of the shock gloves is a neat one, seeing Bruce Wayne in his younger, more reckless stage as Batman is engaging and perhaps the most interesting in the entire series, the voice work from Roger Craig Smith’s Batman and Troy Baker’s Joker is great, and it has hands down has the best boss fights in the entire Arkham franchise, with the Deathstroke one in particular being an all-timer. Not to mention, even Alfred gets his time to shine here, including that great scene where he tries to stop Bruce from going out as Batman, showing he truly sees Bruce as his son and not just as his butler. Sure, it does feel like a pre-heated meal compared to the three Rocksteady Batman games and it did suck to see them pull a switch-a-roo with Black Mask not being the actual villain to make room for the Joker but those flaws are no where near a deal breaker for this game.
While not the best, Arkham Origins easily remains the most underappreciated game in the Arkhamverse. To this day, I don’t understand the scorn that fans have with this game or even why both Rocksteady and WB Games Montreal feels so obligated to pretend this game never happened. I understand being critical of this game when looking at it from a business and commercial standpoint (with it being a “filler” game and all) but looking at it’s own thing and the limited amount of time that WB Games Montreal was given, Arkham Origins is a really solid game with gameplay features and story elements that are among the very best of the Arkham games. I remember playing the hell out of this game when I got in on Christmas Day back in 2013 and enjoying it all the same and still do this very day.
3.) Batman: Arkham Knight
The (original) ending of the Arkhamverse divided Batman’s fans everywhere when it arrived in 2015. While plenty found it to be a worthy send-off for this iteration of Batman, others were frustrated by it due to the new elements that the game itself included. However, as the dust settles and in the wake of lesser superhero games that are somewhat Arkham related such as Gotham Knights and Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League, there seems to be more appraisal towards it. While I did feel a bit cold of this game upon my first playthrough of it, Batman: Arkham Knight has only gotten better with age and easily grows on me each time that I play it.
Yes, there’s too much of the Batmobile that gets more tedious the more the game progresses. Yes, the Arkham Knight reveal is very obvious if you know the Batman lore. Yes, the final showdown with Deadshot is underwhelming. And yes, those goddamn Riddler trophies can go to hell! However, there’s plenty of greatness to be found here! We finally have a fully realized Gotham world that’s fun to explore, the gameplay is the best and more polished than ever before, the voice work is superb, the story is the most stake-heavy with resonating themes that feel very Batman appropriate, the graphics is some of the best in any video game, and is able to find a fitting end to a character that isn’t very well known for having definite endings. Yes, the flaws are still presented and prevent it from being as good as it’s main predecessors from Rocksteady but so are the overall strengths for it.
Do I think Arkham Knight is as good as Asylum or City? Not quite but I do feel there are plenty of instances where it comes pretty darn close. So much so that I wouldn’t be surprised if one day, it would surpass at least Asylum for me. Regardless of the quality of the new Suicide Squad game, I do love how it has encourages fans to look back on this series and see the amazing accomplishments that these games have turned out to be. Showcasing how superhero and license video games don’t have to suck. When you have the right amount of right people who want to create something special, it’s then you will have a gaming series as successful as the Batman Arkham series. Had this been the last true game we got in this universe, I would have been more than okay for how satisfying of a game it truly is.
2.) Batman: Arkham Asylum
You would be hard pressed to find a superhero or even licensed game that was able to define the seventh generation of consoles than Batman: Arkham Asylum. After so many Batman games have come and gone with mixed results, this was the first one that just perfectly capture the distinct feeling of being the Caped Crusader himself. Coming off the year after the release of The Dark Knight which helped set the golden standard for superhero movies, DC and Rocksteady was able to follow the success of that greatly with Batman:Arkham Asylum, the game which helped set the golden standard for superhero licensed games.
Batman: Arkham Asylum is ever bit as awesome as you remembered it was back in 2009. While the boss fights are still rather weak and I don’t fully buy Joker’s “let’s create an army of Banes” master plan, nearly everything else is done rather flawlessly that it’s hard to let those minor gripes bring down the entire game. The combat is absolutely fun with plenty of inventive ways to beat your opponents, the gadgets always come in handy, the detective aspects add a ton to the experience and character of Batman, the entire Arkham island itself is cool to explore, the unlockables are so eager to collect, the voice acting is incredibly stellar, and there’s never a second which you don’t feel like you are in control of The Dark Knight himself.
This is a game that has continued to stand the test time, even 14 years later. For a studio that was relatively unknown before Arkham Asylum came out, there was no better way for Rocksteady to put themselves on the map for gamers all around after crafting this absolute achievement of a video game. If you are a Batman fan and somehow still have not checked this game out, I highly recommend it. Even if you are not a Batman fan and want a really fun action packed game, then I recommend it too. Perhaps it might even turn you into a Batman fan yourself just like I imagine it did for gamers everywhere back in 2009. If 2008 showed how good superhero films can get with The Dark Knight, then 2009 showed how good superhero games can get with Batman: Arkham Asylum! Even to this day, the Caped Crusader remains the standard!
1.) Batman: Arkham City
If you want to talk about a quintessential Batman game, look no further than this masterpiece! After the critical success of Arkham Asylum, Rocksteady knew exactly the direction where to go to top themselves and it perfectly shows throughout the game. Not only does Batman: Arkham City act as a perfect sequel to Arkham Asylum but it also acts as a perfect Batman game and just a perfect superhero game in general. It takes everything you loved by Arkham Asylum, tweaks some of the things that didn’t work about it, throws in some new elements, and is able to off a much grander and wide open world where you truly feel like Batman. If that is not the signs of a great follow-up, then I don’t know what can.
The combat is improved in every way and offers more unique and inventive ways to take down criminals, seeing Batman pushed beyond his limits is always fascinating to see, Arkham City is incredibly fun to explore, Catwoman is a great new addition, the missions from both the main and side stories are all interesting, it’s paced extremely well, the story is the best in the series, the music and voice work are outstanding, and the ending with the death of the Joker will always be an all-timer. This is a game that’s so good that even the little things you can nitpick at (such as Hugo Strange being reduced to being a background villain despite teasing to be the main driving force of the game) aren’t worth mentioning because it doesn’t feel like flaws in any way but more of a tiny little blemish you find on a flawless face. Not to say this game is 100% flawless because no game is but it just feels like that whenever you are playing it.
I don’t think Rocksteady could have followed up Arkham Asylum any better than they did here. If anything, one could make the strong argument that Batman: Arkham City basically acts as to date Rocksteady’s Magnum Opus, a marvelous achievement that every cast and crew apart of this game should be extremely proud of, even 13 years later. Batman: Arkham City is not only the best game in the Arkhamverse for me but it’s one of my all-time favorite games period. I’ve played through this game so many times and I wouldn’t be surprised if I have several more playthroughs with it in the future. As much as I love Spider-Man, when it comes to pure superhero gaming entertainment, Batman: Arkham City still remains on top!
*Warning! This article contains MAJOR spoilers for Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League! If you haven’t played the game yet and/or don’t want anything spoiled for you, then you might want to click off the article right now! You have been warned!*
Oh, boy! Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League is perhaps the hottest and most controversial game at the moment! Even before it’s release, there has been plenty of things that have inspired it’s controversy. From the required online services to it’s obsessed looter-shooter mechanics to this not being a Superman or Batman Beyond game, things were not looking too bright for Rocksteady’s first console game since the mid 2010s. And the fact that it was delayed numerous times didn’t seem to help much either! However, there is certainly not been a bigger controversy of this game than that of Batman’s role. Before we dive deep into why people are angry about how Batman was handled in Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League and whether or not it’s justified, let’s go back a bit to see what happened with the Caped Crusader between Arkham Knight and into this game.
As we all know, Batman: Arkham Knight for a while was considered the definite conclusion to the Arkhamverse. After all, the game ended with Bruce’s identity being revealed to the world by Scarecrow, which gave the orphan playboy billionaire the impression that his time as Batman in Gotham has come to an end. By installing an emergency protocol he activated in case his true self ever got exposed, formerly known as the Knightfall protocol, that led Bruce to faking the death of himself and (presumably) Alfred to have the world think he is dead and hopefully keep those he cares about out of harm’s way. Despite everyone else in Gotham believing he is dead, it’s revealed in the very last scene of the game where two muggers attack a family in an alley that Bruce might in fact still be alive but cosplaying as a nightmarish figure resembling Batman, using the fear toxin from Scarecrow to make that happen.
Even though Arkham Knight was designed to be the true endgame for this iteration of Batman, it still had such an open ending that could open the door to pretty much anything if this series would ever be continued. For a while, there were rumors and speculations that suggested this would lead to the likes of a Damian Wayne-lead Batman game which would have Bruce Wayne in his “Batman Beyond” phase. This game was confirmed by voice actor Josh Keaton to be true and he would have been the voice of Damian Wayne himself. However, due to leaks and potentially WB Games Montreal (the studio that was developing the game) having cold feet on having a game focused on Damian Wayne taking on the Bat mantle, that project never came to pass.
It was then that project would later turn into Gotham Knights, putting the focus on the other members of the Bat family with Robin, Nightwing, Red Hood, and Batgirl after Bruce Wayne’s supposed death. Despite being a reasonable thematic follow-up to Arkham Knight, that game was not considered part of the Arkham canon and stood alone as it’s own game. After several years of rumors of a potential Superman game set in the Arkham universe along with the un-canon release of Gotham Knights, the true continuation of the Arkham canon came with Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League, which the version of Batman would be the same one as we’ve been following in Arkham Asylum, City, Origins, and Knight.
The game states that after Arkham Knight, Bruce disappeared for several years until Superman found him. After he found Bruce, Superman asked for him to come back as Batman and join the Justice League. An offer which Bruce accepted. So now, Bruce as a new home in Metropolis and a new purpose as Batman in the form of the Justice League. Because of all that, the story of Bruce Wayne as Batman continues….even though everyone in the world knows his true identity.
And…that is literally all the context that the game gives us. There have been a few expansion novelization that suggest that post-Arkham Knight, Bruce was depressed and felt his live was ruined after Scarecrow revealed his identity, with the mindset that joining the Justice League would cure him of his depression and allow him to continue his crime fighting persona. But other than that, just about everything that has gone on with Batman between games happened offscreen with major important context being completely handwaved.
When you view that status quo with the little context the game offers us, that basically renders the ending of Arkham Knight rather meaningless. Why did Bruce go through all that trouble in faking his death to protect his friends if he was just going to come back in another city as Batman? By that point, criminals were no longer afraid of him and the world knowing his identity would put his friends in graver danger than ever before. Did Bruce just assume he trained his companions hard enough where they could handle any danger by themselves without his presence, even though Arkham Knight showed us they clearly can NOT?! And what happened with Alfred? Did he die with Knightfall Protocol or was he presumably killed offscreen by evil Batman like his other companions have been (We’ll go into THAT soon enough!)? The game doesn’t really give us any answers to those questions. While that is understandable from a narrative standpoint because this is suppose to be a Suicide Squad game first, it just makes it all the more clear that this could not have been a worse game to continue the plot threads of the Arkhamverse. Instead of getting a Superman or Justice League game first that might expand on that status quo and even justify it, it’s thrown to the wayside where you basically have to fill in the blanks yourself.
When it comes to Batman’s role in the game, he is basically in his pure evil form the whole way through due to being mind controlled by Brainiac. So much so, that he does what normal Batman would not do….kill people. This is shown in the very first sequence with him when he encounters the Suicide Squad. He blatantly uses his batarang to murder security guards and comes close to beating mind-controlled Barry Allen to death until he is ordered by Brainiac to keep him alive. Although, as usual in mediums where Batman breaks his “no kill” policy, it’s incredibly inconsistent. Like, he has no problem wiping out security guards and even the freaking FLASH but when he has the squad pinned down, he just screws off because otherwise….the game would be over in an hour.
However, as someone who tries to overprepare for EVERYTHING in his life, Batman even offered preparations in case something like himself and the Justice League being mind controlled by Brainiac happened. This is revealed in a recorded message once the Suicide Squad breaks into the Batcave. This was a message intended for his companions: Robin, Nightwing, and Oracle (which I guess answers one of those questions I stated before) as a guide on how to stop the Justice League if the group became compromised. Unfortunately, it’s revealed that Robin got taken out by evil Batman with the fates of the other two, Jason, and Alfred being unknown (which proves how dumb of a decision it was for Bruce to come back as Batman leaving his companions defenseless).
It’s then you fight Batman in his nightmare form he had been fighting in since Arkham Knight. After a rather intense sequence where you have to spread the Bat lab with fear toxin gas, you confront the nightmare fueled caped crusader head on until you’ve shoot at him enough times to beat him. The end results leaves Bats badly wounded and bleeding everywhere. The squad takes him to Lex Luthor’s lab, who uses Batman to develop golden kryptonite weapons to kill Superman. In comes the most talked about scene of the game!
In order to lore Superman out of hiding, the squad takes Batman out in the open to execute him. After Harley gives a speech about the history the two have shared throughout this series of games and Batman calling the speech s*it, Harley shoots Batman blank in the face and kills him. Supposedly putting an end to the Arkham Batman as we know it and possibly the last time we will ever hear Kevin Conroy’s voice as Batman.
To say this has pissed people off would be an understatement! To take a version of the character that is considered to be the definite Batman medium in terms of video games and possibly all forms of entertainment and kill him off in such an unceremonious way is guarantee backlash from day one! However, there may be something here that we are NOT aware off and will have to await for seasonal content to determine the true outcome.
First off, I will say right off the bat! DO NOT USE KEVIN CONROY’S DEATH TO DRAG BATMAN’S TREATMENT OF THIS GAME THROUGH THE MUD! THAT IS DISGRACEFUL AND UNCALLED FOR!
No one at Rocksteady could have predicted his death and I’m fairly certain his voice work was recorded at least a few years before his untimely passing. Let’s also not forget that Kevin Conroy himself DID agree to do the voice work for Batman in this game and (if sources close to him are any indication) was perfectly okay with what was done with Batman in this game. It’s not like this is some A.I.-generated voice or anything, this was in fact all Kevin Conroy. The man NEVER once stated that Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League would be his final time voicing the character. It was just unfortunate this had to be one of the very last times for him to do it!
Secondly, let’s not act like Harley Quinn or anyone else is incompetent or isn’t capable of taking the Bats down. After all, this was the same Harley Quinn that was able to capture Batman in her DLC for Arkham City and would have in fact killed him due to lack of oxygen if it wasn’t for Robin saving his life. And if you continue to treat this game as canon to the Arkhamverse, it does tie back to Arkham City and Arkham Knight of Harley Quinn seeking vengeance against Batman for the death of her pudding. Yes, it seems like little HQ is over her pudding’s passing throughout the game, but it does thematically feel natural to her character.
Thirdly, and I’m pretty sure this has basically been confirmed through leaks, this is NOT the same Batman as the one we’ve been following since the Arkham games. What I mean by that is I’m fairly certain that upcoming DLC will reveal that the evil Batman presented throughout the game is not the real Batman but a clone made from the same DNA by Brainiac. The evil Batman that is presented throughout feels so out of left fired compared to the prior Arkham games that I would be shocked if it was not revealed that the Batman in this game is a fake and the real one is still out there somewhere.
If you don’t believe me, there are plenty of hints throughout the game that give the indication that the Justice League presented in the game are in fact not the real ones. You have the Flash that was able to regrow his finger after it got cut off, there’s Green Lantern whose ring doesn’t act the way it normally does, Superman surviving the kryptonite from Wonder Woman, all of the bodies of the JL after their “death” being teleported back to Brainiac’s ship, and even just the fact Brainiac refers to the Justice League at the final battle as MY Justice League and not THE Justice League. Not to mention, this is literally the same game where you have to go to another world to find another Lex Luthor after the one in this universe was killed off by The Flash. It’s time travel at will!
And if you are wondering about the hints of Batman’s potential resurrection, a recent video by the GOAT Batman Arkham Videos, found a hidden easter egg that teases that exact possible outcome for the future. There’s a hidden message in the forms of calendars scattered throughout Metropolis, each highlight a specific date, which the one from December has the bat symbol labeled on the date of the 14th. These calendars serve as a nod to Calendar Man, a villain from Arkham City, and spells out a message in twelve letters that makes sense once you crack the code. That message states, “He will return!” If that’s not a sign that Rocksteady is not done with their version of Batman yet, then I don’t know what is.
I’m sure there will be PLENTY of folks that will claim that Rocksteady would only resurrect Batman and the other previously fallen Justice League members due to the massive backlash of the game but if the hints, easter eggs, and leaked audio of the upcoming DLC is any indication, it’s clear this was planned from the very beginning. Plus, as we should all know now the old saying of comic book storylines, no one ever stays dead except for Uncle Ben and the Waynes.
The bigger question isn’t so much about if Rocksteady plans to revive Batman and the rest of the Justice League but more of when and how? Will they stick to their guns and release the seasonal content when they originally planned to? Will they release ASAP in response to the negative reception of the game? Were they able to get voice recordings of Kevin Conroy’s Batman for this DLC before his death or would they need to recast in order to do so? I’m sure those questions will be answered as 2024 goes around but I’m fairly certain that this will be the final outcome for the Arkham Batman.
Although this is the main problem with live-services games that rely on seasonal content to determine the final outcome of the game but the only thing we can all do is wait and see. While Batman’s resurrection will not solve all of the problems with his inclusion in this game, I am hopeful Rocksteady is able to find some alternative that can either continue his story in this universe or find a real proper ending for the character.
Even if Batman is getting much proper treatment in the upcoming DLC, I still consider Arkham Knight to be the true definite send-off for this iteration of Batman. Anything afterwards to me is basically a “What If?” scenario and nothing else. If it’s done well, I can be like “Yeah, I guess that would be cool!” If it’s not done well, I can then be like, “Well, at least it ended with the last game for me!” I have my Batman games to look back upon fondly and nothing this game does can take that away from me!
Regardless, I’m grateful we got to hear Kevin Conroy voice Batman at least one more time for a big major title! And as I said in my main review, he sounded just as good there as he did when he first put the cape and cowl on back in the 90s with Batman: The Animated Series!
After a near decade long wait, Rocksteady has FINALLY return to the scene with Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League, the studio’s first console game since Batman: Arkham Knight. After the massive success and acclaim of the Batman: Arkham series, I’m pretty sure everyone and their mother had been wondering what this studio would tackle next after such an impressive achievement with that beloved franchise of games. Would they continue that timeline with a Batman Beyond game with a big focus on Damien Wayne? Would they do a modern Superman game running on the same Arkham engine? Would they do a full-on Justice League game? Or would they do something completely original that doesn’t involve DC superheroes? While all of those development cycles had been rumored or speculated for years now, none of those ended up being the case whatsoever. Instead what we have is a brand new Suicide Squad game with the subtitled Kill The Justice League.
Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League takes place in that same Arkhamverse as the Rocksteady Batman games and the one from WB Games Montreal, that puts an emphasis on third-person shooting, exploring an open world, and (at least at the time of writing) requires your service online to be able to experience the game fully. The game was announced in August 2020 was set for a 2022 release date until that got delayed multiple times to improve the overall quality of the game. More DLC in season passes is expected to arrive over the course of the year and possibly even more depending on how the services are later on down the road.
I can’t speak for everyone but I really don’t think a Suicide Squad game was the follow-up of Batman: Arkham Knight from Rocksteady that we all expected or even wanted. Perhaps had there been a few games before this on, such as the previously mention Batman Beyond,Superman and/or Justice League game, it would feel more welcome. But, for a game that has been reported to be in development since at least 2017 and coming from a successful studio who hasn’t released a full game since 2015 (Batman Arkham VR does NOT count!), Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League acting as the first blimp in the radar in what seems like forever doesn’t really inspire much courage.
However, at the end of the day, you can only judge a game based off the final product. And considering I already promised I would do a review for this game when it came out as a means to include my Batman: Arkham marathon, I have no choice to do just that. Is Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League able to make the best out of the worst possible situation or does it really deserve to be dragged through the mud like it has been by the majority of the internet? Let’s start off by talking about perhaps the most conversational aspect of the game, the story!
Story:
First off, I will say I will try my very best to avoid major spoilers. However, considering the fact that the actual premise of the game could be considered a giant spoiler with itself along with the actual subtitle of the game, I can’t make any promises that you won’t at least read between the lines with what I’m about to talk off. And that’s not even mentioning the leaks to the upcoming DLC that basically confirms that events of this game will be retconned or at least the supposed body count will likely not lead to having to carve headstones after all. Either way, if by some chance, you have NOT been spoiled by Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League in ANY way, I would advise skipping this part of the review. There is your warning!
Taking place five years after the events of Arkham Knight, we turn our focus of the series to a group of criminals imprisoned in the Arkham Asylum assembled by A.R.G.U.S. director Amanda Waller. This group is known as Task Force X, A.K.A. the Suicide Squad. The members of the Suicide Squad include Harley Quinn, Deadshoot, Captain Boomerang, and King Shark, who are all forced to fight against their will by Amanda Waller because of little bombs that are implemented inside their head, which Waller can activate at any given moment.
Waller sends the team of Arkham misfits to Metropolis, which is under attack by an all-powerful villain known as Brainiac. It’s discovered that Brainiac has took control over the minds of four of the five members of the Justice League, which includes Superman, Batman, Flash, and Green Lantern, with Wonder Woman being the only member free from his clutches. At first, the team is instructed to find a way to free the male league members from Brainiac’s control and save them all from their evil form. However, after encounters with a brainwashed Green Lantern and Batman along with butting heads with a brainwashed Flash, Waller and the Task Force team soon come to realize that saving them can no longer be an option. The only way to save Metropolis now is by killing the Justice League members all together with Brainiac along with them.
But because most of the Justice League consists of all-powerful superheroes that have special powers that no ordinary living being does, they can’t take beat them with their normal wits and weaponry but need knowledge and resources from a special someone to unlock the secrets to murdering each Justice League member one-by-one. That special someone is no other than Lex Luthor.
However, after something happens to the Arkhamverse Lex Luthor that makes him no longer available, the squad teleported themselves into the elseworlds (basically the DC equivalent of the multiverse) to find a Lex Luthor from another world. The elseworld Lex Luthor confirms to Task Force X that he had worked with the Lex Luthor from their world to prepare for Brainiac’s invasion after he failed to do so in his world. He agrees to go to the world of the Suicide Squad and help them find a way to stop Brainiac and the evil Justice League before Metropolis is completely destroyed.
Commanded by Amanda Waller and assistance from the likes of Lex Luthor and a still-good Wonder Woman, the Suicide Squad must risk their neck and lives to wipe out the members of the corrupted Justice League and Brainiac before even more damage is done in Metropolis and possibly the entire Arkhamverse and elseworlds.
Okay, before I got into how much this story just does not work in the context of being set in the same universe as the prior Batman: Arkham games, I feel like it’s only fair to discuss why this story just doesn’t work on it’s own terms. It starts off decent, with solid introductions to the squad, a fun tour of the Hall of Justice and viewing the status quo of the Arkhamverse, and a tense boss sequence once you come up against Evil Batman for the first time. However, after a somewhat promising start, it falls off the rails completely once it really gets going.
You have ideas and concepts that are barely explored, a pace that seems rushed and all over the place, outcomes of major characters that are handwaved and/or treated as edgy jokes, and an ending that makes it feel like nothing much was accomplished. It’s baffling after making fine use of it at the start that the story seems to lose interest in it’s own concept, trying way too hard to make the Suicide Squad the REAL heroes of the story and not act as the criminal freaks that they are.
The idea of the plot itself could make for a fun spoof of a comic book game storyline with such a ridiculously unapologetic “I don’t give a f*ck! We’re playing by our own rules!”, mirroring the likes of Deadpool, Metal Gear Rising Revengeance, and Sunset Overdrive. However, where as those games at least have a self aware charm to it that lets it’s audience in for such a crazy ride, Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League comes across as more crude and mean spirited than anything else.
That’s not even going in how distractingly similar this is to the plot of Marvel’s Avengers (2020), which this game falls to many of similar trappings with but with different results. Just replace the Avengers with the Justice League, M.O.D.O.K. with Brainiac, and instead of saving the heroic team, you have to kill them, and it’s basically the same plot at it’s core. It’s so familiar that it makes me wonder if this was originally suppose to be a full-on Justice League game but decided it against after seeing the backlash that Marvel’s Avengers got.
When talking about this plot within the context of the Arkhamverse, it’s even worse. This doesn’t so much feel like a continuation of the Arkham canon but more as a 12 year old “What If?” edge lord fanfiction that has only slightly more thought put into it than that Death of Batman fan film. The characters brought back from the prior Arkham games don’t feel even remotely like their previous versions.
Harley seems to have long forgotten about her pudding (Which she doesn’t even say in the game btw!) and feels more in line with the Harley Quinn from the Max animated series than she does of her Arkham counterpart, and that’s not just because she revealed to have actually been in a relationship between Poison Ivy, despite them never EVER being a thing in the previous Arkham games. Riddler and Penguin feel like they were shoehorned in with not much explanation as to why they are no longer in Gotham. And I would say something about Batman’s characterization but I’m saving an entire piece for that.
It’s not that this story couldn’t work within the Arkhamverse but this just seemed like the very wrong game to continue that story with. It’s because having to focus on the Suicide Squad themselves that big questions that people have had since Arkham Knight such as why Bruce came back as Batman and when did the Justice League assemble are given the most “hand-wavey” answers imaginable that gloss over big important context. It only seems like Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League was included in the Arkham canon just for the sake of boosting sales and NOT for the sake of expanding the world even further. When even Gotham Knights feels more like a thematically worthy follow-up to Arkham Knight, you have a big problem on your hand.
The only time the story itself shines is within the characterization of it’s main cast and a handful of interactions. The entire sequence in the first hour where you tour the Hall of Justice and see the way the Justice League team in this universe is characterized within recorded hologram messages is very satisfying to see. It really felt like the writers did their homework when it came to realizing the true appeal of these characters. So much so, it makes you wonder why they went through the trouble of making them feel likable when we are going to have to kill them anyway. The main standouts here involve Superman and Wonder Woman, who basically acts as the protagonist of the story and a guide for Task Force X themselves. It only makes you wish you were playing a Superman or Justice League game instead of this one.
The Suicide Squad members do get some fun moments to themselves as well. Even within the rather crude and tryhard like tone, there’s a few times where most of the jokes and banter pays off. The back-and-forth between the squad and the Flash is fun, it’s cute to see Harley being a Wonder Woman fangirl all of a sudden (even if it makes zero sense in the context of the Arkhamverse), Boomerang gets the most hilarious lines in the game and there’s one sequence which Amanda Waller goes batshit crazy that’s actually satisfying to watch. It sucks that most of the characters are as enjoyable as they are and makes you wish more effort was put into the actual plot itself.
The story itself is possibly the worst thing about this game. It doesn’t work as it’s own thing and it most CERTAINLY doesn’t work as a continuation of the Arkhamverse. Even if there were ideas that might have been interesting on paper, the execution could not be anything less than before. It’s clear that the story took a backseat for everything else about this game and it clearly shows.
However, considering this is intended to be a live service game first, the gameplay is what matters the most. Does that fare any better? Kind of, but not really.
Gameplay:
Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League is an action-adventure game that is set in the open world of Metropolis. It features four playable characters which are no other than the Suicide Squad members themselves. There’s Harley Quinn, Deadshot, Captain Boomerang, and King Shark.
Despite all four characters controlling similarly, each of them has their own kind of weapons, melee combat style, and traversal method for them to chose from. When it comes to weaponry, it involves each class being shared by two of the four characters that are available at the time of release. When it comes to unique move sets and ways to travel, each of the them has a feature that stands out. You have Harley Quinn that has a baseball bat and travel using Batman’s grapple gun, you have Deadshot that has his own guns and can jetpack his way throughout Metropolis, you have Captain Boomerang that can you his boomerang to teleport to where ever it goes and his own gun, and you have King Shark that can jump high and far and his own lovely machine gun. Despite having similar controls, they all are designed to feel differently from one another, making certain missions feel like you should play as one specific character over the other three.
There is also a progression skill tree that is included here. It allows for player to level up to stronger and different skill sets at any point of the game. The more enemies you kill and more missions you complete throughout the game, the higher your ranking will go for ever character. However, each character can only level up individually and is not something you can do with the whole group at one time. The only exception is if you playing through multiplayer mode.
And speaking of multiplayer, while the entire game can be played solo, it does include a four-player co-op multiplayer mode, that can be play with someone you are playing with in person or through online. When playing solo, players can switch between any characters while the other characters are controlled by the game’s AI. However, you aren’t allowed to switch between different characters during a certain mission and can only do that again once you have completed that mission or die before switching up again.
When it comes to the missions themselves, there is literally about three different types that are introduced here. All of them are ones you can beat with the most mindless button mashing and straight forward objectives imaginable for a loot box filled, third-person shooter. You have missions where it involves taking control of enemy bases, there are missions where you have to protect enemies from your allies, and missions where you have to escort someone in a big truck. And that’s basically it when it terms to variety with the missions.
None of them play differently than the other, there’s no interesting mix thrown in between each one, they don’t seem to get much harder or easier as it goes on, and it involves accomplishing the exact same objective over and over and over again. Sure, playing the missions as each individual character can make the experience slightly more different but once you beat each one of these missions with all four members of The Suicide Squad, you have basically seen everything that the missions in these games provide.
I wish I could say more but that’s just about how the mission structure is laid out throughout the entirety of the game. It’s the same rinse and repeat formula that makes each objective clear as daylight without much new added to it except you are playing as DC bad guys now instead of super heroes. It’s certainly functional and works the way it was programmed but there’s very little variety here and that makes it feel like the same loot box, third-person shooter but with a different coat of paint.
The only other exception for the variety of missions are the sections with The Riddler. Yes, The Riddler has returned in the Arkhamverse and is now in Metropolis instead of Gotham for some odd reason that is never explained. As with the prior Batman: Arkham games, there are side quests and missions where you can go out of your way to collect Riddler trophies that are scattered throughout the open world, solve puzzles that have been laid out in the map, and designed obstacle courses that you are given a star rating on depending on how fast you are able to complete each course.
Even taking out the fact that The Riddler’s return here makes ZERO sense in terms of story, I really don’t see the point of these side missions existing. There’s nothing creative or inventive about any of the courses and you never feel the strong desire to take time out of the main story to collect these trophies and solve the puzzles. At least in the prior Arkham games, doing all of The Riddler’s work felt rewarding by the end of it and made beating him all the more satisfying. Unless you are an achievement/trophy whore, you will not feel any obligation to want to play these side missions. I never even bother looking up to see what happens when you get everything or if there is a cutscene with him because I was so uninterest in his presence here.
Just like the story itself, it only feels like The Riddler’s missions are here because they were a staple of the previous Batman: Arkham games and Rocksteady hoped it would help with sales by banking on that Arkham nostalgia. Also, apparently, The Riddler also took time out of its day in the actual ELSEWORLD to laid out trophies to find and puzzles for you to solve. Can this guy just go away please?!?! I NEVER want to see his face ever again!
And of course, there’s the main selling point of the game, the boss fights with the evil corporate versions of the Justice League and eventually Brainiac himself. Throughout the game, you will eventually find yourself encountering with one member of the Justice League, aside from Wonder Woman, and you will have to face off against them. What should be the best part of the game is unfortunately no different than the missions you are already playing.
Sure, some of the earlier boss fights in the game are somewhat different and even fun to play. However, after the first two, it’s like the developers either ran out of money or simply stopped caring because it soon revolves to the same rinse and repeat formula. Even the final boss with Brainiac, is largely just the EXACT SAME BOSS as the very first one in the game. I’m not even joking! He even transforms in that EXACT SAME CHARACTER! How lazy can the developers possibly be!
All these fights come up to is shooting the enemy with one gun, shooting the enemy with another gun, and tossing a few grenades to increase the damage. All you have to do is perform these move sets multiple different times without too many hits and you’ll eventually get them. It’s odd how the story implies that there are only certain ways to beat the Justice League but when you can confront them, it mostly involves just doing the exact same move set you were doing when fighting previous enemies. If this is not the most washed up Justice League that’s ever existed, then I don’t know what is.
When describing the gameplay overall, it’s functional and competent but there’s no variety here whatsoever. There’s nothing here that’s aggressively glitchy, impossible to control, or inherently broken. Aside from having to get used to the different ways certain characters control along with the occasional times I would have to restart the game because my internet disconnected for a split second (Again, WHY is this live-service?!?!), there was nothing here I found inherently difficult to play or get used to. As a matter of fact, once you start to get the hang of it, there is some MILD enjoyment to be had here.
The real main issue here is it’s overall lack of innovation. It’s very clear that someone at Rocksteady and Warner Bros Games had a simple desire of wanting to match with the current trends of games that has grown accustom in the mid 2010s to now mid 2020s. The way the missions, open worlds, and amount of content both at launch and post-launch was clearly inspired by games hot at the moment such as Overwatch and Fortnite. However, where as those games were able to thrive off on unique character designs, creative mission and objective structures, and live-service elements that actually ADDED to the game rather than hinder it, Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League plays off more like if you just took these characters and plunged them into one of these worlds but remove any of the fresh and uniqueness of those games.
Once you really get the hang of the formula of the game, there’s not much here that hasn’t been done in literally every other live-action service game. Once you played all four of these different kinds of mission I mention earlier, you have basically seen everything that the game itself has to provide.
On one hand, that might be a welcome thing to certain folks. After all, in an age where Generation Z tends to have a much shorter attention span than before (and I say this as someone that is in fact part of that Generation), this kind of game is always welcome. It’s basically the perfect game to play while listening to a podcast and watch YouTube too. This was clearly aimed to cater to a certain ground that enjoys those “turn your brain off” games that involves simple button mashing.
If you are part of that group (and again no judgement here), you might enjoy this game. However, for those that were expecting even the tiniest bit of innovation on part with Rocksteady’s previous work and to not fall into the trappings that took down previous live-service superhero games such as Marvel’s Avengers and Gotham Knights, you will likely find yourself disappointed.
Of course, there is also the mention of the confirmed post-launch content (which I go into more in the Upcoming DLC section) that the game itself will provide in the form of seasons throughout the year. There has been confirmation of what Season 1 will include along with teases of what Seasons 2 through 4 will have. There’s even been leaked audio recording of certain characters that could make a surprise return or appearance.
For a while, this was the most controversial aspect of the game. Yet again, here we have a game with required online services with developers that have a hard-on for season passes and loot boxes. Much like Marvel’s Avengers, it feels as if the main full game had only scratch the surface of the main gameplay because it’s saving the extra content for the future. However, if there is one thing that Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League has over Marvel’s Avengers, it’s that that content has been confirmed to be free and you can unlock certain loot boxes and items WITHOUT having to pay more money out of your wallet.
While there are definitely loot boxes and special items that should have been unlocked at the start of the game, these are all still free and things that can be unlocked the further you play along in the game. It might take a little extra work but it’s not more work you are forced to spend a few extra dollars on, unlike say Star Wars: Battlefront II. And as I just said, the seasonal content that will be included with the game’s frequent updates is said to be completely free. No need to charge extra for the game, even if you have to wait a little longer than you should. Considering this game from the same studio that was charging a full season pass for the DLC for Batman: Arkham Knight, the fact they are allowing this all for free is quite surprising and even refreshing. Too bad we have to wait until then to see if ANY of those factors come with the seasonal content!
While certainly not as lackluster as the main story itself, the gameplay of Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League leaves PLENTY to be desired. It’s playable, functional, has and/or will have free extra content, and once you get the hang of way each character’s control and their playset, it can be enjoyable at times. The problem is that we have seen this done with MULTIPLE other games and done MUCH better in other live-service games. There’s no variety in the missions, no progression system that makes you eager to level up your characters to the highest degree, and the boss fights with the Justice League could not be more underwhelming.
It’s an absolute shame that the game itself doesn’t even bother to hide the fact that it’s basically chasing trends and Rocksteady isn’t trying to be as inventive as it once was. Whether this is their doing or Warner Bro Games’ doing is beyond me but it still stinks regardless. If the main objective of Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League was to prove that live-service superhero games can in fact work, it failed spectacularly.
Graphics:
Normally, I would say the graphics for Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League are about as good as it can be for a next-gen 2024 game. After all, the environments look good, the models for the characters fit their designs incredibly well, the cutscenes are delivered at top notch, high quality, and the fact I’m able to see Metropolis exist in the Arkhamverse makes it itself a treat for the eyes. However, following Batman: Arkham Knight, which set a high standard for quality in terms of graphics that still hold up SPECTACUARLY nine years later, I can help but see it as quite a downgrade. Expectations on that front was always gonna be near impossible to match but it really doesn’t seem like anyone at Rocksteady even attempted to top or at least match it, which is the most unfortunate.
I understand that perhaps Rocksteady was wanting to go with more of a cartoon or comic book-like style considering this was meant to be a more gloriously excessive game that didn’t take itself as seriously as the other Batman: Arkham games but I kinda expected the next best thing to come in terms of the advanced technology they have worked on since 2015 and it doesn’t really show here. The game itself looks, sounds, and moves just fine (at least when your internet doesn’t disappear for a split second or later), but for those expecting the next best looking thing after Arkham Knight will likely be disappointed.
Sound:
The score for this game was done by composers Nick Arundel and Rupert Cross. Arundel returns here after doing prior gaming scores with Rocksteady with Arkham Asylum, City, and Knight. Cross, on the other hand, had done prior works in other entertainment medium such as theater (Hamlet, Frozen, Macbeth), television (101 Dalmatian Street, Everything Now), and film (Thor, Rise of the Planet of the Apes, Brave,Cinderella (2015), and Beauty of the Beast (2017)). Kill The Justice League marks only the second score for a video game he’s ever done, with his first being 2013’s Puppeteer. Despite having proven talent to do the score, I couldn’t help but feel the score was lacking.
While it does it’s job as delivering a more rock-and-funk feel to the whole game, I can’t recall very many tracks that stuck with me or made me want to go out of my way on my own time to listen to them on YouTube. The main track that stood out for me was Batman’s theme when he first appeared in the Suicide Squad’s first encounter, even if it felt like an unuse track in one of the Christopher Nolan’s Batman movie. There are also a couple of decent tracks with the Justice League themselves but aside from that, the score is serviceable at best and forgettable at the worst.
I knew this would have a different style of music compared to the prior Batman: Arkham games but it’s baffling how not one track stuck with me the way the best tracks of those games were able to stick with me and even the not-so-great tracks did.
The voice work in this game is very strong. Nearly every actor and actress notable here are able to fit their role perfectly and have their voices completely match the designs of the characters and the dialogue given to them. With at least one notable exception (which I will get into), almost every voice actor suits their role very well. The biggest standouts come from the Justice League themselves, so much so that it makes you wish you were playing a full game with them.
Nolan North is able to be as perfect as Superman as he is as Nathan Drake, Deadpool, and the Penguin (which he also returns as). He perfectly captures that sense of hope and optimism that the Superman character always stands for and even works when presented as evil superman. Scott Porter is able to get the game’s best laughs as The Flash, Dan White fits well as the John Stewart version of Green Lantern, and Zehra Fazal brings such raw charisma as Wonder Woman. And of course, even though having an evil Batman presence could not have come at a worse time, Kevin Conroy gave it his all as this more twisted version of Batman, clearly having an absolute blast in the role the whole way through. The Suicide Squad team along with the rest of the cast don’t measure as high as the Justice League members but they all do fine work (Even though I wish folks would bother to redesign video game characters played by Debra Wilson), with one notable exception.
That exception is no other than Tara Strong as Harley Quinn. I’m just gonna come out and say it….I can’t stand her as Harley Quinn. I’ve tried given her the benefit of the doubt many times in the past when voicing this character but I can no longer do that. Her HQ’s voice is just way too raspy, ridiculously high pitched, and sounds more like she’s trying to impersonate a cartoon character rather than just sounding like…..a person. And no, the fact that Mrs. Strong has revealed herself to be not so bright doesn’t factor into my opinion on her as the Joker’s pudding, she is simply not a good Harley Quinn whatsoever. Arleen Sorkin (May that angel RIP!), Margot Robbie, and Kaley Cuoco are the real trio of the Harley Quinn Hall of Fame!
Upcoming DLC:
As previously mentioned, Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League will be provided with plenty of additional content that will expand the overall gameplay of the regular game. This will come in the form of seasonal passes that will be updated as the year goes on. All of these will be divided into four separate seasons that will unlockable new playable characters, new playable environments, new boss fights, new weaponry, new missions and activities, and even *shivers* new Riddler content because….why not.
Season 1 in particular has been confirmed to have a Joker from another elseworld as a playable character, new boss fights with the likes of Green Lantern and Superman, new playable environments, new dc villain themed weapons, new activities/strongholds, new Riddler content, and even two episodes with fan-favorite villains such as Two-Face and Scarecrow. Seasons 2 to 4 have not had much detail of it’s content just yet aside from most of the kind of content already mentioned but I wouldn’t be surprised to see us back in the Arkham Gotham that we all know and love.
Like with Marvel’s Avengers and even EA’s Star Wars: Battlefront 2, I’m sure this expansion of content might be good enough to improve the quality of the game for a good number of folks. Especially since, in this case, this is all said to be completely free content with no need to buy multiple passes or loot boxes.
On one hand, credit for Rocksteady to be able to avoid that trapping of trying to needlessly squeeze more money out of consumers, even if they couldn’t avoid the other ones. But considering the way that these along with other leaks gives confirmation that certain events from the game might be undone or rewritten entirely, it might just make the overall point of this game feel pointless. Even if those that hated the game will find themselves won over after certain characters are confirmed to be not dead after all, even they will wonder why this was made as DLC or seasonal content and not for say….it’s own actual game.
I don’t know if I will make a piece in the future once all this content is made available but considering it’s suppose to be free, I will certainly tried them out once they are released. Even if Rocksteady was basically forced by Warner Bros Games to make a game that rely heavily on live services and online action to chase the trends of Overwatch and Fortnite, this might’ve been the best results of this we could possibly get given the dire circumstances that surrounded it all.
Conclusion:
Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League feels like a game that was basically doomed from the start. Not just because this was a game nearly a decade in the making and following Rocksteady’s previous track record with their successful Batman: Arkham games but it was basically by design made to chase the worst kind of trends in modern gaming imaginable. It does some of those trends better than most but like most, it’s own restrictions holds it back from its true potential.
It may get the job done by offering a typical action and shoot-them-up game for those that crave for it but it really doesn’t bother to be anything much else than that and basically hopes the upcoming seasonal content will be enough to save the day. And considering the vital reaction this game has gotten online, it will take a LOT of convincing for folks to get this game another chance once the expansion of content have arrived.
If Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League is the DC equivalent of Marvel’s Avengers, then we can only hope that Monolith’s Wonder Woman will be the DC equivalent of Marvel’s Guardians of the Galaxy, a superhero licensed game that ends up being a pleasant surprise following a previous underwhelming superhero licensed game.
That being said, I sure can’t wait until Marvel responds to this game by making the game, Thunderbolts: Kill The Avengers game. That will SURELY be a banger!
This week, it has been reported that Microsoft is considering bringing most of their exclusive IPs and upcoming games to PlayStation. These games include Starfield, Hi-Fi Rush, Sea of Thieves, the Gears of War franchise, and Indiana Jones & The Great Circle. This was all reported by Giant Bomb’s Jeff Grubb, an insider within the gaming industry. While this is all not 100% guaranteed, it is certainly being considered by Microsoft.
Games that Microsoft is considering bringing to PlayStation.
• Starfield • Hi-Fi Rush • Sea of Thieves • Gears of War franchise • Indiana Jones & The Great Circle
To see this many prior exclusive games and franchises from Microsoft consoles such as Xbox Series X and PC potentially going to their main competition of Sony and their PlayStation 5 is quite mind boggling to here. While it’s far from the first time that a previously exclusive game off Microsoft consoles would make it’s way to Sony consoles (Just look at, Rise of the Tomb Raider!), to have a big portion of Microsoft biggest IPs and franchises working it’s way to their main competitor is certainly a sign that things could be changing drastically for Microsoft and for gaming. So much so, that it’s starting to make folks wonder whether Microsoft’s days in console wars are being numbered and shall soon fall into the footsteps with the likes of Sega, abandoning console making and going full-third party with their games.
In case one doesn’t know, Sega at one point in time did in fact develop consoles of their own. This included the likes of the Sega Genesis, Sega Saturn, Sega CD, Sega Dreamcast, and many others. However, in the 2000s, due to not selling enough consoles and facing potential bankruptcy, Sega had no choice but to stop developing consoles and sell software onto the consoles of their previous rivals. With the Dreamcast failing to compete with the original PlayStation, Xbox, and the GameCube, the days of Sega consoles were no more and would eventually see the likes of Sonic the Hedgehog and his friends on every other console known to man for the foreseeable future. While this is likely won’t be as sudden as the way Sega dropped out of the console war, one has to wonder whether Microsoft is destined for a similar fate. The main difference being that this has been in the making for quite a while, a making that is the textbook example of death by a thousand paper cuts.
I plan to make a separate piece about this in the future but Microsoft has had a hard time keeping up with Sony and even Nintendo for quite some time now. This largely goes back to their reveal of their eighth generation console, the Xbox One, back in May 2013. The Xbox One was promised to be more than just an evolution in gaming but evolution of entertainment medium in general. Microsoft marketed their console as an “all-in-one entertainment system”, which was the reason it was called Xbox One. Unfortunately for Microsoft, the concept of the console itself involved a lot of controversy.
From the overreliance of television features to the required online connections to the lack of backwards capabilities to the potential erasure of physical media to barely any focus on their upcoming exclusives/IPs, it was about the worst possible reveal for a new console imaginable. Things got even worse when E3 came around and Sony promised the PlayStation 4 would be the exact opposite of everything that Microsoft was trying to force onto gamers. It would put the major focus on gaming, online services weren’t required, backwards capabilities would still be a thing, physical media still had a major presence, and there would be plenty of exclusives/IPs made strictly for that system.As if all of that weren’t bad enough, a little salt in the wound was added when previous Microsoft CEO Don Mattrick responded to the criticisms of required internet by telling those who didn’t have internet to just get an Xbox 360.
Despite having all the momentum in the world heading into the eight generation with coming high off of the Xbox 360, Microsoft fumbled the ball big time when it came to trying to sell the Xbox One. Sony was basically handed the eighth generation console war on a silver platter and made for the best use of it. They were able to steamroll the Xbox One and made way for the PlayStation 4 being one of the most successful gaming systems of all time. Microsoft found themselves passed by Sony during the mid to late 2010s and eventually Nintendo once the Switch became a thing. The mistakes that Microsoft made for the Xbox One before and after it’s release was simply baffling. So much so that one could argue that they are still paying for it to this day.
Even if the way Microsoft handled the build up to their next console, Xbox Series S/X, wasn’t nearly as bad as the way that they handled the Xbox One, some of their biggest fatal flaws from that console would eventually carry over. From still too much focus on other entertainment assets such as televisions and music to not enough intriguing exclusives or IPs to doing jack s*it with the exclusives and IPs from companies that they actually bought to it’s confusing as hell console titles, unable to tell the difference between which is which, the Xbox Series S/X was not the answer they were looking for, following their humiliating defeat in the eight generation. To this day, I still am confused on what the Xbox Series is even to suppose to be. And when I’m confused about something that should be so simple, then that must mean the majority of the human population would feel the same way.
Because of all of the mistakes I’ve mentioned and more, one can’t wonder if what’s happening with Microsoft right now could be something that has been nearly a decade in the making. The aftermath of a disastrous console reveal, the constant focus on everything except the actual games themselves, the lack of self awareness with the consumers they are suppose to cater to. It’s now all beginning to crashing down hard on Microsoft. Over ten plus years of bad company decisions and focusing on the wrong things had led to this moment. The moment where Microsoft waves the white flag to Sony and Nintendo and will now find themselves joining alongside SEGA and others where they will only deliver software to consumers and no longer hardware.
Regardless of what the future holds for Microsoft and the Xbox, things are not looking too bright right now for them. According to Microsoft CEO Phil Spencer, the company will share details about what their future awaits them sometime next week. It’s only then will we know exactly where Microsoft head is truly at and if it’s heading in the direction we all think it’s going. And if it is, then I would be lying if I said I didn’t see it coming. And Microsoft has no else to blame but themselves for letting it happen.
Another link with more detail from Jeff Grubb himself:
Argylle is quite a strange movie to talk about. Not only because of how shockingly dishonest the market campaign has been by putting the spotlight on the wrongs actors and not the ones that are actually leading the picture. It’s more that I’m not entirely sure how to describe this movie without sounding like a complete lunatic. If I were to tell any sane individual what actually happens in this movie, they would probably tell me I was out of my mind and go into this movie without believing such nonsense.
And make no sense, Argylle is complete nonsense. It’s too long, juggling so many different ideas that it doesn’t know what to do with, and contains so many twists and turns that it will likely make your head spin. But, it also has ridiculously stylish action scenes, two fun leads with great chemistry with one another, a talented cast, whether playing big or small roles, having a ball, and has such an unapologetic “I don’t give a f, I’m playing by my own rules!” tone throughout that it’s nearly impossible to be bored by it. So, yeah! It may not be technically good but I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy myself. At the end of the day, that’s what matter the most, right?!
Premise: Reclusive author Elly Conway (Bryce Dallas Howard) writes best-selling espionage novels about a secret agent named Argylle (Henry Cavill) who’s on a mission to unravel a global spy syndicate. However, when the plots of her books start to mirror the covert actions of a real-life spy organization, the line between fiction and reality begin to blur. Elly must team up with Aidan (Sam Rockwell) to stop a devious organization known as the Division, led by Ritter (Bryan Cranston), before they corrupt her whole life and career as an author.
So, yeah. That should tell you right there that this movie may not be what the marketing has been selling you as. Instead of playing like a Henry Cavill and John Cena buddy cop vehicle along with Dua Lipa being along for the ride, it’s more like a twisty, espionage-like version of The Lost City, where the main characters learns what she thought was writing for fiction was really writing for truth. As the catchphrase in the film goes, “the greater the spy, the greater the lie”.
Films like this is always commendable. Not just because it’s technically an “original” film but also because it allows for imaginative creative forces like Matthew Vaughn getting to show off his best moves for the whole road to see. However, whereas the original Kingsman: The Secret Service (Still Vaughn’s best film to date!) was able to thrive with that creative, over-the-top energy being the driving force, Argyille gets rather muddled by it.
Thankfully, while not being the true front-and-center like the poster would have you believe, Bryce Dallas Howard and Sam Rockwell make for a great likable main duo that helps keep the picture steady. They have nice chemistry with one another, with plenty of nice back-and-forth banter with one another that brings back the good old days where men and women could be equal action stars together. Howard, in particular, is surprisingly convincing as an action star and gets plenty of set pieces herself to kick some butt that makes her character’s rather bizarre arc and transformation even remotely believable. I would say the same for good old Sam Rockwell but at this point, I think everyone should know by now that there is not one role which this man can NOT do.
The action in general is where Vaughn’s is able to be at his most creative and comes the closest of capturing that same lightning in a bottle that he did with the original Kingsman. It’s the type of action that might sound stupid when saying it out loud but watching in motion, I couldn’t help but be captivated whenever they were happening. The main highlight in particular is the one major scene where Bryce Dallas Howard basically proves she is born to be an action star of not just behind the camera but in front of it as well. There are times to where it does get distracted by some pretty darn noticeable CGI (although nothing as outrageous as say….CGI Henry Cavill) but the sequences themselves are when the film gets it’s most energy.
Where the film falters is unfortunately from the script department. Despite clearly wanting to be homage to traditional spy thrillers with it’s out of nowhere reveals and throwing in plenty of twists and surprises, it makes the whole lore and universe building much more convoluted than it needs to be. There is a lot that is thrown at you with each 180 that the film decides to flip that even thinking about for a single minute will make you realize how little this holds up under scrutiny. Had Argylle been a brief two hours at max, it might have been able to get away with that. However, with a runtime of nearly two hours and twenty minutes and so much time dedicated to it’s overly complicated plot, it simply doesn’t work.
It’s also rather bizarre how this film isn’t a strict-R rating. With most of Vaughn’s prior filmography consisting of mature material like Kick-Ass and of course, Kingsman, what excuse was there to not have this be R-rated. Was it because of the 200 million dollar budget and Apple feeling having an R rating would hurt those sales? Beats me but despite the film doing the best it can, Argylle comes across as more tame because of it’s PG-13 rating and never can let Vaughn’s unhinged vision come to life because of it.
Argylle is definitely a film that is easy to dislike. From the misleading marketing to it’s rather bizarre plot to it’s tame rating, there are plenty of reasons to not be a fan of it. However, I would be denying I didn’t enjoy myself with what I got despite of these glaring issues. The action is still fun and creative, the cast (despite not being in the roles you may like) are entertaining, and there’s so much thrown at you throughout it’s 139 minute long runtime that it’s impossible to be bored by it. And considering the lack of original IPs in this day and age, I always love to give props to films that try to offer something different even if it falters a bit.
At best, Argylle plays like a water-down Kingsman, which occasional reminiscence of Matthew Vaughn’s better days but in this case, I’ll take what I can get. Perhaps check this movie out on a discount Tuesday or something and see if it’s worth your time. Anything to save the theater experience!
Other thoughts:
The Cat is the real MVP of the picture!
Henry Cavill’s hair is whatever the exact opposite of MVP is!
If Taylor Swift really wrote the story here, then that cat must TOTALLY have been her idea!
FYI, about that post credit scene! No, Matthew Vaughn! Just no!
If you were to ask what particular television show had a huge impact on my specific generation, formally known as Generation Z, the answer you will likely get more times than not is Spongebob Squarepants. I would be hard pressed to think of a show that came out in the 2000s that hadn’t been remembered, talked about, beloved, hated, dissected, and especially MEMED to death! While there are plenty of shows now and then that have those kind of impacts, there’s something about Spongebob Squarepants that hits a bit differently.
On the surface, it seems like a very basic premise. What if you followed someone throughout their everyday life where they work, play around, and hang out with their friends and family? The main core difference here is that instead of it being in the human world or another planet, it takes place strictly underwater. That right there leaves plenty of room for a show to have plenty of creative world building, neat visuals, and a tons of creative and funny jokes! And for the universal praise that this show has gotten since it started back in 1999 is anything to go by, I would say that Spongebob Squarepants was able to utilize that familiar but different premise to it’s absolute fullest potential.
However, there is one specific era that is referred to as the absolute golden era for Spongebob Squarepants. That era is of course the first three seasons of the show, which basically acted as the original run for this series. This was when the creator of the show Stephen Hillenberg (May he rest in peace!) had complete control along with creative director, Derek Drymon, that acted as the main showrunner of this show and would later go on to be a part of the writing team of the first two films along with being the head director of the upcoming fourth film, Search for Squarepants. Needless to say, these two teaming up along with a handful of credited writers were able to make something truly special for this show’s original run.
Everyone has their own different opinions of Spongebob Squarepants post-original era but no doubt, you will never hear anyone say a bad word about this show in regards to it’s first three seasons. Even to this day, you plenty of folks that remember, quote, and meme episodes of these three seasons to death, which goes to show the everlasting impact this show has gotten over the past 25 years. Because of all of that and more, what better way to kick off this marathon than discussing what is considered by many to be the “golden era” of Spongebob Squarepants, the first three seasons.
Season 1
Now, I will admit, I do find Season 1 to be the weakest of these first three seasons. It’s the one which the animation has shown it’s age, the pacing feels the slowest, it’s much more “quiet” in terms of it’s sound, and this is also when the voice actors were going through their “growing pains” to get comfortable in their roles that they would end up be voicing for over the next two decades. That being said, this still does make for about as good of a first season for the show as you could imagine.
This is when we get introduced to the characters we would all come to love. You have the main character of Spongebob Squarepants, his best friend Patrick Star, his next door neighbor Squidward Tenacles, his other friend he meets Sandy Cheeks, his boss Mr. Krabs, his pet snail Gary, his boat teacher Mrs. Puffs, his boss’s arch nemesis Plankton along with plenty of others. Regardless of how big or small of a role they would end up playing in any individual episodes, there’s is always a certain trait or even a line that one of them says that makes them stand out on their own and become a fan favorite of some sort.
You have Spongebob always aims to be positive and upbeat, Patrick is lovably dumb, Squidward is depressed and moopy in a way that’s funny but also immensely relatable, Sandy is super smart and an absolute butt kicker, Mr. Krabs is always money hungry, Mrs. Puffs is a stress-filled teacher, Plankton is the arch rival that always finds himself on the losing end. Whether it’s their specific personality or they are so funny or they are just feel relatable, the characters of Spongebob are full of charm and memorability that it’s part to pick which one is your absolute favorite because they all have their great traits to them. Even Patchy the Pirate, a pirate who happens to be Spongebob’s #1 fan and Tom Kenny, the voice of Spongebob himself, and his pet parrot Potty, get plenty of laughs in the earlier season in their live-action bits, despite these almost ALWAYS falling flat with animated shows.
When it comes to the world building, they do enough to where it feels much more different than what it would feel like in the real world with humans or even on another planet with aliens. While it certainly doesn’t make 100% logical sense and certainly doesn’t go too deep into the “rules” of how this world operates, this is always a fun and interesting universe to spend time in and is always interesting to put your shoes with these characters and see how you yourself would act if you got to live at the bottom of the ocean.
The plots of the episodes themselves tend to be light hearted and very simple while relying mostly on it’s humor and visuals to tell it but that’s okay since the show is based around those exact elements and is able to deliver on those fronts when it counts the most. Even every now and then, there will comes an episode that has a strong moral to it that anyone of any age can get something out of it. Take the end of the episode, Ripped Pants, where Spongebob performs a song which reflects the general message of that episode. That message being learn to be yourself in front of ones you care about and not be someone you are not. Otherwise, you’ll end up like the sponge who ripped his pants in this episode. It’s nice, direct messages like that which is always springled throughout this series that helps make these stories stand out well, even if it’s not the most complex writing ever.
That of course, should also talk about the sound and audio of the series which helps gives the show it’s own unique personality. While it’s not quite as strong here as it is with the other two seasons as it does feel more one-note in comparison, it’s the kind of music that’s always catchy, relaxing, lives rent free in your mind, and always feels appropriate for the Spongebob show and character. It’s the kind of music that whenever you listen to a piece from it, you almost ALWAYS know it’s from Spongebob Squarepants.
Even if I do think this is the weakest of the first three seasons since it at times gives off the impression of everybody involved in the cast and crew getting their foot in the door, it still contains that sort of heart and charm that makes the best episodes of this show stand out completely well on their own. There’s plenty of well-loved episodes here such as Bubblestand, Ripped Pants, Pizza Delivery, Opposite Day, Fools in April, and the Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy episodes. If I had to pick a favorite, it would probably be either Ripped Pants and Pizza Delivery. Ripped Pants has the most wholesome message of any episode in this season and Pizza Delivery is Spongebob at his absolute wackiest and funniest. Regardless of this being my least favorite of the first three, it was more than good enough for Nickelodeon to greenlight a second season.
Season 2
Now, here’s a season that’s better than the first one in just about any way and may possible even be the very best season in the entire show. This was when you can tell that everyone on board this show were sitting fully comfortable in their square pants and came into work everyday just knowing what roles they are set to play. The animation is much better, the characters are more organic, fleshed out, and move more fluidly, the humor is even more hilarious, the pacing is more breakneck, and the overall world that is the Bikini Bottom feels more like it’s own character than ever before.
This is where most of the absolute fan favorite episodes came to be! You got classics such as Graveyard Shift, Squidville, Christmas Who?, Shanghaied, The Fry Cook Games, and Sailor Mouth. And of course, who can’t forget what is considered by many to be the very best episode on the show, Band Geeks! Like, if you tell me you never laughed at any of the jokes or quoted any one of the lines in this episode, you are a LIAR! And you are ESPECIALLY a liar that you don’t remember this episode for the iconic song, Sweet Victory, that plays at the very end of the episode! That episode along with plenty others in Season 2 is a perfect representation of this show at it’s absolute best.
Just like the first season, you also got a handful of episodes that have a solid moral at it’s core, teaching kids everyday lessons that they ought to learn. The biggest example being Procrastination, the episode where Spongebob is trying to do EVERYTHING but complete his essay. It’s a great examination on the dangers of procrastination, how simple distractions and laziness can prevent you from getting your homework done if you allow it to. Sure, it ends with the assignment being pointless because Mrs. Puffs cancelled it but that still doesn’t change the fact that you need to get work done when you can and never try to push it aside whenever you can. Of course, not all episodes are like that with plenty of humor and lighthearted writing to carry it but it’s another indication that this is not a simply “mindless” show that nowadays relies on memes to carry it. The majority of these episodes are classics for a reason and there’s a reason why they still resonate in the mind of so many who grew up with Spongebob.
Regardless of what Spongebob character is your favorite and what kind of Spongebob material is your favorite, Season 2 should MORE than satisfy you on every level. Each main Spongebob characters get their own episodes and moments to shine, the art design and animation is much improved and possibly better than ever, the humor is at it’s funniest, and it’s able to move at it’s own steady pace without every wearing out it’s welcome. Whether you are a kid whose looking for an entertaining cartoon or a parent/guardian/older sibling who is “forced” to watch it with their kids, there is plenty for anyone to enjoy about the second season of Spongebob Squarepants. This is when the training wheels were completely off and everyone on the cast and crew were ready to ride their bikes full throttle. And man, did they prove that whatsoever with Season 2!
Season 3
Season 3 was no doubt able to end the last of the original run of Spongebob Squarepants on a high note. It’s able to keep that consistent and quality level of humor, charm, and morals throughout with it’s characters still being endearing and Bikini Bottom still being a fascinating place to visit. If there is one thing holding it back compared to Season 2 had to do with the amount of interference that Nickelodeon had on the show and the bizarre airings of it.
To start off with the second point, many of the episodes of Season 3 were aired out of order from their original release slate. As a matter of fact, they started airing episodes of this season even before airing all episodes of Season 2. Nickelodeon has always had that weird habit of releasing episodes whenever the heck they want (Just ask Jimmy Neutron and Danny Phantom!) and that certainly applies here. It’s just stupid and Nickelodeon is stupid for that.
And speaking of stupid things, there was also some bizarre censoring of certain episodes from Season 3 that was done by the network’s part. There was the infamous bit in Mid-Life Crustacean where Spongebob, Patrick, and Mr. Krabs are going through a women’s underwear drawer, which so happened to belong to Mr. Krabs’ mother. That episode was removed from rotation in 2018 until it was added back in on Paramount Plus due to a glitch until it was removed again. There was also a bit in Just One Bite where Squidward is trying to get into the Krusty Krab to snatch more Krabby Patties from himself but gets caught in a gas explosion trap twice and blows up both times. That bit was removed due to it feeling too reminiscent of 9/11…..for some reason. I don’t know any sane individual that thought of the World Trade Center blowing up during that scene but it was a thing. It’s nothing that bugged me too much but it certainly were things that fell off-putting now in retrospect.
There’s also the fact that this season doesn’t really have a definite final episode. Granted, that’s because the true original finale of the series was suppose to be with The Spongebob Squarepants Movie (which we will discuss next month) but having no real finale for the televisions series feels rather bizarre. If the movie weren’t a thing, the very last thing we would ever see of the show is Spongebob and Patrick being exposed butt naked in front of everyone at the Krusty Krab. Not to mention, how the last two episode segments made it’s way to VHS and DVD first before television. I know that because I saw those two episodes first on DVD at my cousin’s house before then. Keep in mind, none of these problems I mentioned are deal breakers or ruin my enjoyment of the show but those are things that just stick out for me if I had to nitpick.
Even taking those things out of the way, Season 3 is still very good overall. It too contains some of my absolute favorite episodes from the series such as Nasty Patty, Krab Borg, Chocolate With Nuts, The Camping Episode, and The Krusty Krab Training Video. This is also strangely the season where I happened to see the most memes off the show out of them all for some bizarre reason. I can only tell you how many times I’ve seen the meme from sports fans whenever a team chokes than the one where the health inspector is choking on a fly while Spongebob and Mr. Krabs are laughing their balls off.
While I do think Season 2 is a snatch better, I do think this is definitely the best of the first three seasons in terms of animation, character designs, art style, and especially voice work. I don’t think there was more range in any scene of this show from Tom Kenny when Spongebob is going on his rant to Mr. Krabs about how much Squidward is driving him crazy in Can You Spare a Dime? If that’s not proof about how talented that man is at voice acting, then I don’t know what is. Everything that worked about the prior seasons works just as well here, even if the interference from Nick itself and a underwhelming special or two (Ugh! is just…..nothing!) did start to show the cracks on the armor with this once untouchable series.
Even so, had the show ended with Season 3 the way it was originally visioned too by Stephen Hillenburg himself, it would have been a good note to go out on. Of course, due to their being a Spongebob movie on the rise along with Nick not ready to put away the Spongebob toys yet due to the character’s insane popularity, the show did continue with Season 4 and onwards. Despite all of that, Season 3 was basically the end of the original run of the show and it certainly ended that run with good graces.
In Conclusion
It’s hard to say things about the first three seasons of Spongebob Squarepants that hasn’t been said already by everyone else on the planet. It’s the perfect example of capturing lightning in a bottle. It does everything that it’s suppose to do right. The characters are lovable and memorable, the world building is unique and inventive, the jokes comes thick and fast with very little that miss, the music is classic and pleasant on the ears, and there are enough morals to enough episodes that helps make it just more than mindless children entertainment.
When going back to these seasons many years later, it’s easy to understand why this series has had the lasting appeal that is has had. When it comes to animation that is great for kids and families that works as a simple comfort show or one to watch for the wacky visuals and humor, there’s not very many out there that can top Spongebob Squarepants. Even if not every single episode is a perfect 10/10 and the “special” episodes don’t necessarily feel “special” but more like two 11-minute long episodes crammed into one 22-minute long episode, there’s not a single moment throughout these first three seasons that feels wrong for the universe this show takes place in and the tone that it’s going for with each episode.
Although the first three seasons are considered the original run of the show, there is at least one other thing that came out shortly after the third season ended. One thing that basically acted as an epilogue for this run of Spongebob Squarepants and even at one point was considering the true ending of the show. That, of course, is The Spongebob Squarepants Movie. The next thing we will be talking about next month for this yearly-long Spongebob marathon.
The regular season for NFL football has come to an end and that can only mean that all eyes are set on the playoffs. I’m not gonna lie, this was a ROUGH year for the National Football League in my humble opinion. From constant refball to controversies on and off the field to a good chunk of teams not being particularly good despite their winning records, this made for one long and sloppy year of football. While it certainly made for plenty of amusing memes and trash talking, the product on the field was just way below par. Because of that and more, that makes this year of playoff predictions a bit easier to rank than prior years. I think I got a good indication as to who are truly the teams that have a shot at taking home the super bowl trophy. Could I be dead wrong on all of these? Absolutely! However, I think I’m gonna be more right with my predictions than ever before.
Anyways, time to start what will undoubtedly be my FLAWLESS predictions for the NFL postseason!
American Football Conference Wild Card Rounds
Cleveland Browns (#5 Seed) at Houston Texans (#4 Seed)
Date: Saturday, January 13th, 3:30 PM CST
Pick: Cleveland Browns
Reason: The Browns have the firepower from both offense and defense to shut down the Texans. Cleveland allowed the fewest yards per game and Flacco and Cooper was able to make good work out of Houston earlier this year. Not to mention, Flacco is tied with Tom Brady himself for the most road playoffs win by a QB with seven. If my prediction is anything to go by, he shall beat that record come Saturday. Hats off though to the Texans for completing in an impressive worst-to-first turnaround but they will likely not do any damage in the playoffs this year.
Miami Dolphins (#6 Seed) at Kansas City Chiefs (#3 Seed)
Date: Saturday, January 13th, 7:00 PM CST
Pick: Kansas City Chiefs
Reason: These are two teams that are coming into the playoffs ice cold. However due to more playoff experience and proven winning veterans, the Chiefs should be able to take care of business against the Dolphins. Kansas City has been struggling big time offensively as of late but Miami has lost 10 straight games in a row when the game starts off less than 40 degrees, which is likely going to be cold by Saturday. Thrown in the fact that Miami is dealing with a ton of injuries on defense, Kansas City is the favorite for me to win this game.
Pittsburgh Steelers (#7 Seed) at Buffalo Bills (#2 Seed)
Date: Sunday, January 14th, 12:00 PM CST
Pick: Buffalo Bills
Reason: Once again, the Steelers was able to use their devil magic to secure another winning record and another playoff spot. However, like with prior seasons, this is where that magic will run out. The Bills have been a hot team as of late, winning their last four games and finishing the season strong despite their early struggles and inconsistency. Also, losing T.J. Watt on defense is going to hurt BIG TIME for Pittsburgh. While it likely won’t be as embarrassing of a lose for the Steelers as their humiliation to the Browns three years ago, I don’t see a scenario where Buffalo won’t come away with the victory here.
National Football Conference Wild Card Rounds
Philadelphia Eagles (#5 Seed) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (#4 Seed)
Date: Monday, January 15th, 7:15 PM CST
Pick: Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Reason: This has the chance to be the most one-side game in the entire playoffs. The Eagles have been playing like absolute crap for the past six weeks while the Buccaneers have been playing great for the past six weeks. Everything has gone wrong for Philadelphia from an offense and defense standpoint and things have just clicked better for Tampa Bay all around. Unless the Eagles view the playoffs as an absolute reset for themselves and play like the team that started off 10-1, this should be all Bucs for the divisional rounds.
Los Angeles Rams (#6 Seed) at Detroit Lions (#3 Seed)
Date: Sunday, January 14th, 7:15 PM CST
Pick: Los Angeles Rams
Reason: I think this will result in the biggest upset of the playoffs. While the Lions were able to make it back to the playoffs and win their first divisional title in a while, I can see the Rams shocking everybody and coming the way with the win. The Rams despite a lacking defense, have a very underrated offense and the Lions have struggled quite a bit in their own home stadium. There always comes a shocking upset every year and I believe the Rams trumping the Lions in their own home stadium will be the biggest shock of them all.
Green Bay Packers (#7 Seed) at Dallas Cowboys (#2 Seed)
Date: Sunday, January 14th, 3:30 PM CST
Pick: Dallas Cowboys
Reason: Dallas has been a dominated team this year and has been EXTREMELY dominated at home, with a perfect 8-0 record for the year. While Jordan Love and the Packs have been impressive as of late, they are still a relatively young and inexperience team, likely still a few years away before making any real noise in the postseason. Yes, Cowboys have been a laughing stock in the postseason in recent years but if there is any time to turn that exact narrative around, it’s with this game right here. By the end of the night on Sunday, Jerry Rice will leave the stadium with a big smile on his face.
American Football Conference Divisional Rounds
Cleveland Browns (#5 Seed) at Baltimore Ravens (#1 Seed)
Date: TBD
Pick: Baltimore Ravens
Reason: The Ravens were easily the best team in the American Football League this year, firing on all cylinders in terms of offense and defense. While the #1 seed has proving to be a curse in recent years for just about every major sport, I don’t see that outcome here against the Browns. Cleveland has some impressive pieces, especially from an offense standpoint, but Baltimore will just be too good and dominate for them to handle. While the Brownies will no doubt go down with a fight, they will go down regardless and the Ravens will be taking their first steps to securing their first Super Bowl title in just over a decade.
Kansas City Chiefs (#3 Seed) at Buffalo Bills (#2 Seed)
Date: TBD
Pick: Kansas City Chiefs
Reason: These are two very good teams that perhaps should have better than they were in the regular season. So much so that it’s baffling that one of these two will likely make it to the second-to-last round. However, between the two teams, the Chiefs just speaks to me as the kind of team that can turn the tide around once January rolls around. With the Bills, however, in spite of their recent hot streak, their inconsistency in their offense and defense will be on full display throughout this game and will likely cost them another chance at a Super Bowl run. No offense to Josh Allen but you are no Patrick Mahomes!
National Football Conference Divisional Rounds
Los Angeles Rams (#6 Seed) at San Francisco 49ers (#1 Seed)
Date: TBD
Pick: San Francisco 49ers
Reason: The 49ers were the best team in the National Football league this year and there is no reason to think they won’t show that against the Rams. Despite Los Angeles being a worth opponent against San Francisco in the past, there’s too much vulnerability on that team that can easily be exposed by the 49ers. San Fran is just a team that can be you in many different ways and that will likely be the main outcome here. Kyle Shanahan has been 10-5 in his career against Sean McVay and will no doubt use those favorable odds to his advantage.
Tampa Bay Buccaneers (#4 Seed) at Dallas Cowboys (#2 Seed)
Date: TBD
Pick: Dallas Cowboys
Reason: The Bucs will be fortunate enough to take down an ice cold Eagles but a red hot home-friendly Cowboys will be their brick wall that they will hit. If the stars align perfectly for Dallas, they will continue to be undefeated at AT&T stadium, with an impressive 10-0 record combined with the regular season and postseason. Tampa Bay will certainly try but sometimes, trying is no where near good enough, especially when facing off a team you are way out of league with in the Dallas Cowboys.
American Football Conference Round
Kansas City Chiefs (#3 Seed) at Baltimore Ravens (#1 Seed)
Date: Sunday, January 28th, 2:00 PM CST
Pick: Baltimore Ravens
Reason: While a big part of me can see the Chiefs pulling off an unexpected victory, I can’t help but feel like this will be the end of the road for the defending champs. There is too much holes in this roster compared to last year’s winners that the Ravens just don’t have. Mahomes and Kelce will give everything they have but Baltimore excellent defensive lines will shut them down and their offensive lives will be too much for Kansas City to handle. It’s not always wise to pick a #1 seed to make it to the Super Bowl but the Ravens can easily break that curse with a steady win against the Chiefs here.
National Football Conference Round
Dallas Cowboys (#2 Seed) at San Francisco 49ers (#1 Seed)
Date: Sunday, January 28th, 5:30 PM CST
Pick: San Francisco 49ers
Reason: This will be the better and more competitive match-ups between the two conference games but I see 49ers edging out victory against the Cowboys. Dallas is slightly more vulnerable on the road than they are at home and have been San Francisco’s daddy in their last three match-ups. The 49ers just has the Cowboys number all around and that alone can lead this to a very expected outcome. But hey, congrats to good old Jerry for his first NFL championship appearance in nearly 30 years. That should amount to something.
Super Bowl LVIII
Baltimore Ravens (#1 Seed) vs San Francisco 49ers (#1 Seed)
Sunday, February 11th, 5:30 PM CST
Pick: San Francisco 49ers
Reason: Yes, I have the two top seeded teams making it to the Super Bowl! Yes, I have the same match-up that we got on Christmas day making it to the Super Bowl! And yes, I see the 49ers marching their way to their very Super Bowl title in the 21st century against the Ravens. Kyle Shananhan will at long last get his redemption arc after the brutal results of his prior Super Bowl failures against the Patriots and Chiefs. And speaking of revenge, the 49ers are just a team that likes to have revenge for breakfast (just look at that brutal beat down against the Eagles earlier this year that basically broke them). I don’t know how close or one-sided this game will be since these are two teams will similar strengths and weaknesses but I believe the San Francisco 49ers will walk away with the big trophy hanging over their head. Will this be one of the more predictable outcomes? Possibly, but with the way this year has gone, I’m going with predictability all together.
It’s become cliche to say that a movie released in January sucks. After all, January is pretty much considering the dumpster month of movies. A time where the kids are back in school and the awards contenders are able to hit that end of the year deadline in some areas to qualify for the Oscars. However, in recent memory, there has been a solid number of released films released around this time that were actually not bad or had at least some version of quality. 2016 had Kung Fu Panda 3. 2017 had Split. 2018 (at least in America) had Paddington 2. 2020 (before the pandemic) had Bad Boys For Life. 2022 had Scream. And just last year, 2023 had M3GAN. None of these films were necessarily masterpieces (except for Paddington 2) but they did at least start their respective year on a decent enough note that got folks interested to see what the rest of the year had in stores. If there is a January movie in 2024 that would do exactly that, it’s CERTAINLY not going to be Night Swim. Despite Blumhouse being able to surprise folks with M3GAN last year, they can not make that same lighting strike twice here.
Premise: Forced into early retirement by a degenerative illness, former baseball player Ray Waller (Wyatt Russell) moves into a new house with his wife (Kerry Condon) and two children (Gavin Warren, Amelie Hoeferle). He hopes that the backyard swimming pool will be fun for the kids and provide physical therapy for himself. However, a dark secret from the home’s past soon unleashes a malevolent force that drags the family into the depths of inescapable terror.
The most blatant problem with Night Swim is how it can’t seem to figure out what kind of film it wants to commit the most too. You would believe based off the premise of a pool monster who preys on those that dare take a late night swim would put the majority of the focus on building tension and creating inventive scares that will get under your skin during and after the movie ends. However, it also wants to be a deep thematic movie about learning to accept a new stage in your life when you can no longer go back to the prior one and the overall meaning of sacrifice for the ones you love. Night Swim tries to do both stories at the same time but it’s done in the most half baked way imaginable.
The overall lore and mythology of who exactly this pool demon is are painfully underdeveloped. It’s never clear as to who this monster is, why it does what it does, or even how it’s been allowed to thrive in this pool for so long. Even when we get to the part where the original victim of this monster dive into the backstory of their prior encounter with the demon, it just makes thing even more complicated and confusing than it already is. It seems like it wants that pool to come across as some sort of drug, where the father and son become too addicted to it to the point where they are starting to lose who they are, but it’s never clear as to why it’s suppose to help those that swim into the pool. At best, it might heal Ray Waller of his disease sooner rather than later so he can go back to playing baseball but even then, aside from one scene where they go to the hospital for checks, that never gets addressed again and the movie goes on to the next nonsensical thing. It’s not a good thing when the first thing I ask myself when the movie was over is like, “Why don’t the family just NOT swim in the pool?!” There, problem solved!
The human drama with Ray and his disease is probably the most engaging subplot but it honestly feels like it should have made for it’s own movie rather than this one. A story about Ray having to choose to embrace his new life fighting this new disease only with his family or working his way through his illness to become a ball player could make for an interesting flick but not for a horror one. It’s the two conflicting tones of wanting to be a human drama and an intense horror thriller that makes Night Swim feels at odds with itself. This is all the more apparent in the final reel which the main character makes a move that’s suppose to tie into the overall theme the movie has been flirting with throughout the runtime but because of the other things it had to focus on, it comes across as anti-climatic and (the more that you think about it) incredibly stupid. It should have decided if it wanted to be a personal character driven drama or a straight up scary flick, not both at the same time.
When it comes to the scares themselves, some of them are decent but there is nothing here that will make your skin crawl shortly after the film ends. Most of it only works when it happens in the moment and there’s no creative visual imagery that will be living in your head rent free. The rest of the scares are poorly shot, lighted, and edited where I could barely see what was happening on screen. The perfect example are the scenes towards the end where the mother and son goes into the pool to confront the demon and it felt like the filmmakers had the desire to hid as much as possible for whatever reason. I don’t know if it had to do with the lack of a big budget, the proper rating, or that the director doesn’t have much major film experience but for those coming for the scares, you will likely feel ripped off as well.
Acting wise, while far from the worst performances you will see in an January movie, there’s nothing that stands out from the cast. Wyatt Russell is the most entertaining one here but feels too comedic for this role, almost feeling like he would fit better in a Jordan Peele horror movie rather than this one. Even during the scenes where he supposedly turns evil, it’s hard to buy his sudden turn because of him keeping that same form of charisma that he did in his good form. The rest of the performances from the cast are passable at best but nothing to write home about, giving that exact feeling of only being in it for a quick paycheck.
Night Swim is a perfect example of why horror movies or movies in general released in January get a bad rep. It’s a confused mess that has no idea what kind of film it wants to be. The tone is all over the place, the scares aren’t effective, the lore and mythology surrounding the monster and haunted pool don’t add up, and the ending the more I think on it might just be one of the dumbest endings to a film in recent memory. It might be technically “watchable” and might find an audience for those that have a soft spot for these trashy January horror flicks but it’s definitely not something I can recommend you should go out of your way to see. If anything, you are better off just watching the short film that this is based off of. I may not have seen it myself but I’m willing to bet it’s better than whatever the feature film was.
Move over Bambino and Billy Goat, the newest baseball related curse has arrived in the form of Night Swim!
2023 is now officially over which mean it’s now time to roll into 2024! And what better way to kick off the early part of January then to share what new films I’m looking forward to the most in 2014.
I’ll be straight up honest with you, there’s not very many films that I’m over the moon excited to see this year. If anything, there’s not so much movies I’m excited for and more movies that I’m CURIOUS for. When viewing the 2024 movie release slate as a whole, you can definitely tell it’s been largely affected by the multiple strikes that took place throughout the course of 2023, causing many film releases to be paused or delayed entirely. Because of that there’s so many films set to come out this year as we speak that we literally know NOTHING about. Perhaps there will be smaller films under my radar or even brand new big films that I have ZERO excitement for will win me over but for now, I’m going into 2024 with pretty pedestrian expectations for what it will bring us in terms of films.
That being said, I still do have ten movies this year that I do have interest in and more likely will check them out around the time that they release.
FYI, I will NOT be including Dune: Part Two on this list because that was already on last year’s list. Considering that only got move backed due to the writers strike along with the fact that was on my list from last year, I don’t need to remind you again that I am legit excited for that movie.
First off, I have a five honorable mentions.
Honorable Mentions:
Argylle
We see Matthew Vaughn returning to the spy action genre once again with a stacked cast and an original premise that will hopefully bring a good spin on the genre as we know it. Hopefully, Vaughn is able to recapture that lightning in a bottle he did with Kingsman: The Secret Service and avoid the trappings that brought down Kingsman: The Golden Circle.
Ballerina
With The Continental acting as the first spin-off series in the John Wick universe, Ballerina will act as the first spin-off film set in the John Wick universe, taking place between Chapter Two and Three. It will star Ana De Armas as a ballerina named Rooney, a character from Chapter 3 but has been recast, seeking revenge by hunting down the murder of her family. If done well, this has potential to expand upon the John Wick franchise in interesting ways, even without it’s titled main character. And if you saw her brief cameo in No Time To Die, you would know that Ms. Armas is more than capable of handling an action role.
Borderlands
After returning to his roots last year with Thanksgiving, Eli Roth is taking his next step a year later with the newest video game film adaption in Borderlands. Even with the increase in quality over the years, video game adaptions are still something to be very cautious over. Even so, there’s a lot of notable names in the cast here with Cate Blanchett, Kevin Hart, Jack Black, and Jamie Lee Curtis and Eli Roth is the master at making over-the-top bloody gore fests. With the correct rating, this could at worst be a relatively fun time and make for perhaps the goriest video game movie we’ve ever seen!
Joker: Folie à Deux
This is one that I’m more CURIOUS about than EXCITED. Even as someone that enjoyed the first Joker but wasn’t jumping off the roof over it, I don’t think it was a film that warranted a sequel. But because the first one made a billion dollars, we see Todd Phillips returning for a follow-up which will see the origin of Harley Quinn played by Lady Gaga and is said to have a more “musical” vibe to it. I have no clue if this will work or not but no doubt I will be there day one to see how this whole thing will play out. This is a bold strategy, let’s see if it pays off!
Nosferatu
More than just his cameos in Spongebob Squarepants, Nosfreatu will be a modern remake of the 1922 original starring Bill Skarsgard himself with Robert Eggers (The Lighthouse, The Northman) taking directing duties. Eggers has been a director that has just entered my radar and I’m profoundly interested to see if he can pull off a high quality remake of a film that is now over 100 years old.
Now, here we go with the main top three!
10.) The Fall Guy
The summer movie season of 2024 is not kicking off with yet another Marvel superhero movie but with a fresh action thriller with The Fall Guy, acting as an adaption of the 1980s tv series. We get to see Ryan Gosling acting as a daredevil stuntman that becomes a reluctant investigator to save his ex-girlfriend’s film. David Leitch has easily grown accustomed to the action genre with his work on John Wick, Atomic Blonde, Deadpool 2, Hobbs & Shaw, and Bullet Train and he looks to continue that even further with The Fall Guy. Even if it’s technically not an “original” film, this looks like it will be a nice change of pace for summer blockbusters and shown it’s more than just an overreliance on superhero or franchise installments.
9.) Kung Fu Panda 4
There are plenty of reasons to be skeptical about a Kung Fu Panda 4. It’s rare to see three straight franchise films in a row to be as consistently good as they are (even if Kung Fu Panda 3 was a step down from the first two) and it’s even rarer for a fourth film to top or even match that level of quality. However, if there’s one thing you should learn by now when it comes to Kung Fu Panda, it’s to NEVER judge a book by it’s cover. Here we will see Po accepting his new role as the Spiritual Leader of the Valley of Peace while passing on the role of the Dragon Warrior to someone else. With a new set of characters such as Zhen (Awkwafina), Han (Ke Huy Quan), and the brand new antagonist the Chameleon (Viola Davis) along with old familiar foes set to return such as Tai Lung (Ian McShane), Kung Fu Panda 4 looks to act as a culmination of the entire Kung Fu Panda series up to this point. Just please make sure the Furious Five come back in some way, shape, or form!
8.) Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire
Maybe this is recent bias, but after being on cloud nine with Godzilla: Minus One, I can’t help but be more excited for some more action with the King of Monsters. This looks set to be a rematch between Godzilla and King Kong himself, with the two facing a new global threat that will challenge their very existence and the survival of the human race. Based off the marketing and trailers we’ve seen thus far, Adam Wingard seems dead set on promising a gorgeous, action-packed spectacle featuring the two titled characters that everyone is looking to see along with perhaps something more than that. While it will be hard to top Minus One, Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire is certain to be a genuine crowd pleaser that will be able to expand the brand of these two beloved monsters, allowing their legacies to expand even further.
7.) A Quiet Place: Day One
After two excellent entries in this latest horror franchise, A Quiet Place: Day One will act as a spin-off prequel, showcasing the earlier days of when the worldlike apocalypse in this universe occurred that whipped off the majority of the human population. With Michael Sarnoski taking over for directing duties over John Krasinski, he will look to provide new and inventive ways to deliver clever scares and unique set pieces along with expanding upon the mythology of this franchise even further. I never would have guessed a horror series that has quite a paper-thin premise on paper could get me excited for multiple entries but if they can keep delivering films that are this well made, acted, and engaging, then I will happily take more of them.
6.) Inside Out 2
There is a strong argument to be made that the original Inside Out was objectively the very best Pixar film ever made. It was an animated film that did everything it could with it’s special premise and delivered a stellar motion picture about emotions and feelings and the importance of every notable one of them. With the first film tackling the days of little Riley as a young girl, the second film looks to take a step even further and show Riley going through her days as a teenager. With the new emotion of anxiety and a few others entering this film, we are likely to get a deep dive into the mindset of a young teenage girl going through her own personal struggles. As much as people have been overly critical with the amount of sequels that Pixar has developed over the years, Inside Out 2 is one that has more than enough material on paper to justify it’s existence. If they can make this work, I’ll take more sequels as there is plenty of stories to tell with the entire concept of these movies.
5.) Mickey 17
This is not necessarily one that I know most about or what the actual title of Mickey 17 is suppose to mean. However, there’s one name attached to this project that’s more than enough to me excited for this film to come out. That being no other than the director of Bong Joon-ho. Acting as a follow-up to his Oscar-winning masterpiece of Parasite (*insert angry incel anti-woke fanboy*), Mickey 17 will act as an adaption based off the 2022 novel Mickey 7 and will star the current Batman himself in Robert Pattinson. Would Mickey 17 be this high on the list or even on the list at well if it weren’t for the cast and crew behind this? Probably not. But sometimes, that is more than enough to convince you that it will be worth checking out or at least be a worthwhile quality piece of art.
4.) Deadpool 3
Acting as the only cinematic entry to be released in the Marvel Cinematic Universe, Deadpool 3 will be looking to add the humor, charm, and violence that made the first two movies so good and be able to deliver them in new, satisfying ways. With Hugh Jackman coming out of retirement as Wolverine (in the classic Wolverine suit at long LAST) along with potential other well-known X-Men characters joining the party with longtime actors reprising their roles, I wouldn’t be surprised if Deadpool 3 ends up being to Deadpool what No Way Home was to Spider-Man in acting as a celebration of prior Marvel movies. If done well, this can serve as a delicious appetizer and gets everyone excited for the next main course that will be the upcoming Avengers movies, most notably Secret Wars. Oh, and I wouldn’t be surprised to see Taylor Swift have a role in some way. After all, you gotta get that few extra bucks from the Swifties.
3.) Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga
Approaching the 10 year anniversary of the action movie masterwork that was Mad Max: Fury Road (can’t believe it’s ALREADY been nine years), George Miller returns once again to this post-apocalyptic world which he helped created but with a prequel that puts the spotlight on the latest action heroine icon from Fury Road in Imperator Furiosa, played this time around by Anya Taylor Joy. With this being reported to be in the works for several years now, this is clearly a passion project for Miller himself and wants to give everything he has to do it. While it does look more CGI-ish compared to Fury Road, if Furiosa is able to at least capture a quarter of the magic that 2015 game changer did with it’s stunts, action, visual storytelling, and emotional depth, then it may just continue the Mad Max franchise even further, with hope that the long in development installment, Mad Max: The Wasteland, might see the light of day. Even so, I’m just at least happy to be able to spend more time in this universe.
2.) Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes
In an age where most newest installments in long-running franchises are uneven and inconsistent in terms of quality, who would’ve guess that it’s the recent run of Planet of the Apes movies that is ahead of the curve in that regard. Coming off a hugely successful three-movie run with Rupert Wyatt and Matt Reeves that told the complete story of Caesar, the baton has been passed to Wes Ball for Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes. Set 300 years after the events of War for the Planet of the Apes, ape civilizations have emerged higher than ever while the human population is now at it’s absolute lowest, with the focus now on a young ape named Noa and a young human girl named Mae. If the quality of the first three rebooted ape movies is anything to go by, I would expect Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is to be yet another amazing accomplishment with motion capture and visual storytelling along with getting one step closer to the events of the original 1968 Planet of the Apes where it’s completely ape dominated. Between this and Furiosa, Memorial Day weekend is sure to be one strong weekend for films.
1.) Sonic the Hedgehog 3
Do I expect this to be the best movie of 2024? No! Is there a strong chance that this will likely be the worst of the anticipated films I’ve mentioned? Yes! But at the same time, I can’t help but have my mind set on Sonic the Hedgehog 3 more than any other upcoming movie this year. Maybe it’s due to the fact that the prior two Sonicthe Hedgehog movies were honestly more or less the Sonic movies I’ve always dreamed off as a kid but Sonic 3 has a chance to not just set a new standard for video game movies but possibly make Sonic popular than he ever has been before. With it set to introduce fan-favorite character Shadow the Hedgehog, possible well known Sonic characters such as Amy Rose and Rouge the Bat might get thrown into the mix, seeing how the Sonic lore is more expanded upon, and even just seeing how the main trio grow as characters, Sonic 3 just seems set to be an absolute blast for Sonic fans, video game fans, and everyday moviegoers alike. We might not know the exact plot synopsis quite yet or even who is going to be cast as Shadow the Hedgehog. However, the build up and anticipation to it’s holiday release of Sonic the Hedgehog 3 is what I’m looking forward to the most throughout the majority of 2024. I don’t expect this to win an Oscar or even be my absolute favorite of the year, but the inner child in me is what make Sonic the Hedgehog 3 my most anticipated film of the year!
As for other big movies coming out this year:
I saw Night Swim early. It kinda stinks and is pretty much the exact definition of a January horror movie. Don’t expect another pleasant surprise like M3GAN from it.
There’s another Mean Girls coming out that acts as more of a musical than an actual remake. Hopefully, it’s not another Mean Girls 2.
Madame Web seems set to be a Madame Webbing time (Did I do that right?).
Love Lies Bleeding looks like it will be every Sapphics wet dream.
Ghostbusters: Frozen Empire was another holdover from 2023 but from the trailers, it looks like yet another reminder about how Hollywood has completely forgot what made Ghostbusters special.
Rebel Moon: Part Two might fix the flaws of Part One but either Netflix needs to learn how to properly release their feature films or Zack Snyder needs to learn how to release a proper film in it’s actual cut released for theaters and streaming.
There’s a new Universal monster movie set to star Melissa Barrera, the actress who just got fired from Scream due to voicing her support from Palestine. That alone is enough for me to show my support!
Alex Garland’s Civil War seems set to be the most controversial film of 2024 in both the best and worst ways possible. Just please let this be closer in quality to Ex Machina and Annihilation and NOT Men.
There’s another Strangers film coming with The Strangers: Chapter 1 for fans of that series. I’m not really one of them.
An animated Garfield film is also coming on Memorial Day alongside Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes and Furiosa. It looks cute but why does Chris Pratt got to be in every animated movie nowadays?
Bad Boys 4 might still be a thing this year, assuming the whole world has gotten covered Will Smith’s Oscar slap.
Despicable Me 4 is happening because….I guess the kids still love minions.
Twisters is an upcoming disaster film with the director of Minari. That could be good.
M. Night Shyamalan has another movie set with Trap. And even his daughter has a new movie as well. Let’s see how those turn out!
Horizon: An American Saga is getting Chapters 1 and 2 in the same year directed by Kevin Costner no less. Could be interesting!
Alien, Lord of the Rings, and The Karate Kid are getting new films this year believe it or not but we literally know NOTHING about them whatsoever.
Gladiator and Beetlejuice are getting sequels….for some reason.
Kraven the Hunter movie is still a thing….for some reason. Marvel’s Spider-Man 2 game pretty much already has that beat by a mile.
Transformers One could be yet another surprisingly enjoyable or just okay Transformers movie that will likely underperform at the box office because the world is still recovering from Bayformers or even misses it.
Wolfs is the next film from prior Spider-Man director, Jon Watts. We’ll see how that goes.
Saw XI and Smile 2 are coming because of how successful the last Saw and first Smile was.
Venom 3 will likely be another film which will help Sony continue to destroy the last remaining will that superhero movies still have. At least Tom Hardy will still be run, right?
Red One is an upcoming Christmas adventure with The Rock and Chris Evans because….of course.
Wicked: Part One will be a newest musical fantasy adaption that I may check out if the reviews are good enough.
And of course, Disney is releasing Mufasa: The Lion King, which will likely be another bad or underwhelming Disney live-action remake that pales in comparison to the original. Barry Jenkins is WAY too talented of a director for this!
Another year of entertainment has come and gone so it’s time to look back at some of the very best that it had to offer. It’s been a wild and chaotic year for Hollywood and Cinema in general! From the near-year long strikes to financial bomb after financial bomb, there was a lot of negativity to take in with movies this year. However, despite all of that madness, there were still plenty of greatness that 2023 was able to offer with cinema! That’s why it’s now time to share my picks for the top ten best films of 2023 (that I actually saw)!
A few disclaimers is that I did not see EVERY film I wanted to see by the end of the year. These include films that have gotten rave reviews from critics and audiences such as Poor Things, The Iron Claw, Maestro, American Fiction, The Color Purple, and The First Slam Dunk. I’ll see them whenever I can but I couldn’t see them on time for this list. Perhaps in the future, I’ll make an updated list of the best films of 2023 and I might include them once I see them. But for now, just know that I couldn’t see every critically darling to come out in 2023.
As per usual, I will start off the lists of my typical unqualifiable mention and my special mention.
Unqualifiable Mention:
Rebel Moon- Part One: A Child of Fire
Ngl, I probably shouldn’t have this on here because I honestly don’t see this being a cult classic outside of the hardcore Zack Snyder fanbase, even when the Snyder Cut and Part 2 comes out. However, if there’s one thing I’ve learned when it comes to movies is to NEVER underestimate the sci-fi genre! There is plenty of interesting concepts and exciting moments throughout Rebel Moon. The visuals are as good as they can be for a Zack Snyder film, the worldbuilding while familiar is intriguing, the action is pretty damn solid throughout, and Sofia Boutella is awesome as Kora, the most compelling character in the whole film. It’s just a shame that it can’t escape the trappings of most theater cuts from Zack Snyder where a good chunk of it is left on the cutting room floor.
Even so, I still couldn’t help but be intrigued by Rebel Moon- Part One: A Child of Fire despite it’s major flaws. Maybe it’s because I’m just a sucker of the sci-fi genre and I’ll always just take whatever I can get with them. It lives rent free in it’s own sandbox and throws so many different ideas on the screen that it’s near impossible to be bored by it. I don’t know if this will gain any sort of recognition once time have had it’s day with it but in this case, I feel Rebel Moon is worth a mention.
Special Mention:
The Super Mario Bros Movie
Acting as the highest grossing animated film of 2023, The Super Mario Bros. Movie is the one video game movie that feels like it was 100% ripped straight from the games in terms of it’s animation, style, world building, and amount of fan service throughout. It even works quite well as a simple story of a complete zero turning into a complete hero along with the importance of brotherhood. It’s just so much fun seeing characters such as Mario, Princess Peach, Donkey Kong, and Toad kicking butt together on the big screen for the first time ever. Not even the common tropes from Illumination Animation that brought down their prior movies such as an obvious celebrity heavy voice cast and awkwardly inserted song tracks are able to bring this one down, which likely has to do with Nintendo’s influence. I don’t know how I would feel about this movie if I wasn’t a Mario but since I am, I couldn’t help but be very satisfied with this movie.
And now here are the honorable mentions (in no particular order):
M3GAN
Missing
Creed III
Air
Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves
Evil Dead Rise
Suzume
Are You There God, It’s Me Margaret?
Elemental
Nimona
Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning- Part 1
They Cloned Tyrone
Bottoms
The Holdovers
The Boy and the Heron
And now, onto the main top 10!
10.) Barbie
The highest grossing film of the year was also one of the year’s best! What easily could have been a by-the-numbers flick for little girls that would have been better off going straight to streaming, Greta Gerwig decides to go beyond that and craft a film about traditional gender roles, identity, and why there should be a proper balance between the matriarchy and patriarchy. Barbie is as clever, funny, and creative as you could expected given the talent involved, with Margot Robbie and Ryan Gosling being a match made in heaven as Barbie and Ken respectively. The world-building is as strong as it could possibly be with a movie surrounding a toy brand that everyone is aware off, each cast member are clearly having the time of their lives, the soundtrack is one you are likely gonna have stuck in your head as soon as you leave the theater, and it feels so refreshing to see a new summer blockbuster that seems to have to same love and passion it does from both in front and behind the camera. It doesn’t all work 100% and there will certainly be plenty of folks that will take issue with the way it handles it’s themes and messages but for the most part, Greta Gerwig is able to make lightning strike a third time in a row and has made herself a new name to look out for. If you’re a woman, you probably already saw this movie and love it. And heck, even if you are a man, watch it yourself and you’ll probably have a good time as well!
9.) Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem
Of all the feature films that have we have gotten so far involving the TMNT brand, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Mutant Mayhem is probably the movie that has gotten the most things right, aside from the 1990 original. While the animation and art style does take obvious inspiration from Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse, it’s able to learn the right lessons from it by creating exciting set pieces and inventive visual storytelling. It looks amazing, the turtles themselves are all well-utilized, bounce off each other perfectly and actually FEEL like teenagers, the story feels fresh yet faithful to the turtles themselves, the score is absolutely killer, the action is a lot of fun to sit through, and it’s able to exist in it’s own sandbox as being the kind of thing that can stand proudly on it’s own two feet along with being among the best of what the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles have offered throughout their history. While I won’t go as far to say that it’s a perfect film in it’s own rights, it’s certainly a perfect TMNT film and one that will likely be the one to get a new generation into this successful running franchise. And if the next film and the new 2D series that’s in the works is as good as Mutant Mayhem, then this next wave of TMNT fans will have plenty to be spoiled by!
8.) Godzilla: Minus One
Perhaps the most surprisingly film to come out in 2023. Who would’ve thought that after so many different Godzilla incarnations over several decades that the character and brand can still find new ways to craft great motion pictures? Godzilla: Minus One not only makes for an instant kaiju movie classic but it’s perhaps the best the character has been on screen since 1954 original. It’s able to pull off that perfect balance of offering exciting Godzilla action and a compelling story with human characters you actually care about, the aspects that many recent Godzilla films have failed SPECTACULARLY at! Even when Godzilla isn’t on screen, you don’t mind as much because of how compelling our main human lead is in Ryunosuke Kamiki’s Kōichi Shikishima. The visual effects are excellent, the sound design is off the charts, and the third act is so tense that it will have you on the edge of your seat. I have a few nitpicks that keeps this from being higher on the list (mostly the detour between the end of the second act and beginning of the climax that dragged for me) but this is DAMN good cinema regardless of those gripes! Between this film, the Monarch: Legacy of Monsters series, and the upcoming Godzilla x Kong: The New Empire movie next year, Godzilla fans have a LOT to look forward to in the future!
7.) Killers of the Flower Moon
Killers of the Flower Moon is once again another winner from the great Martin Scorsese. It’s an exceptionally well crafted and brilliantly acted picture that goes to show why Martin might just be the best when it comes to making these kind of period pieces. It’s as every bit of gripping, emotional, and impeccable as you heard, the 3.5 hour longtime while excessive is put to good use, and it’s another reminder why films like this are worth experiencing on the biggest of screens possible. And Lily Gladstone MORE than deserves that Oscar for Best Supporting Actress! I don’t know where this ranks among his very best but it’s certainly a film that will leave an impact on you, one way or the other. As we reach Scorsese’s final chapter of his 80-year old life, this plays out as the proper beginning of the end of one of our finest filmmakers who has ever lived. Because of that, it’s best to enjoy Scorsese pictures as much as we can while the man is still breathing! Let’s do that and STOP asking the man of his opinions on Marvel movies! Please and thank you!
6.) Talk To Me
No horror film this year was able to impact me and hit me harder than Talk To Me. This is a thrilling and frightening tale about a group of friends led by Sophie Wilde’s Mia that uses an embalmed hand as a way to talk to the dead, taking the cast on a wild journey that makes them connect to spirits in ways they would never imagine and will soon learn to regret. It’s able to take it’s genius horror premise and does just about everything you possibly can with it, creating haunting visuals and imagery that is guarantee to stick with plenty of horror fans alike. The story is gripping, the set pieces are incredibly inventive, the scares are absolutely heart-racing, the tension is felt in every second of the runtime, and the visuals metaphors still live rent free in my head to this day. A24 is certainly not the most mainstream friendly studio out there but when they deliver, they deliver HARD! So hard that even the mainstream audience that give their films a F ranking on CinemaScore have to appreciate it! Talk To Me doesn’t just stand as my favorite horror film of the year but I wouldn’t be surprised if I was able to make room for it on my favorite films of the year period. Just superb entertainment all around!
5.) John Wick: Chapter 4
John Wick: Chapter 4 is an exceptional achievement of not just the John Wick franchise but for the action genre in general. Not since The Raid movies has there been a series of action films that dares to go as big, bold, and as over-the-top as this film does. Yes, the action has never been better choregraphed and executed than it has been here. Yes, the cinematography and pure scope have never looked and felt better than it does here. Yes, just about every noteworthy person in the cast get a moment to shine and scenes that stand out so well you can’t wait until someone uploads them to YouTube. Yes, the near three-hour runtime does not feel daunting in any way. Working perfectly as John Wick himself getting pushed beyond his reasonable measures along with director Chad Stahelski and crew of pushing themselves to make the most unbelievable and badass film imaginable. Even if Chapter 4 does bring a logical stopping point to John Wick’s story, it leaves plenty of room of other characters in the series to have their stories to continue if anyone wants to go that route. I’m not one that likes to claim when a movie is “perfect” but when it comes to John Wick: Chapter 4 and is able to deliver the goods with an absolute bullet point, it’s hard to bring up any flaws that bring the experience down.
4.) Past Lives
Past Lives makes for a beautiful and touching tale about two friends, separated as children, being reunited as they confront destiny, their love for one another, and the choices they have made throughout the entire life. It’s a deep exploration of the connections we have with ourselves and the ones we care about along with our struggles that helps us define who we are. It’s about two dear friends that went their separate ways but might have an urge to try to relief the good old days in the here and now. It’s perfectly directed, beautifully acted, thematically relevant, emotionally engaging, and uses it’s slow-burn pacing to it’s absolute full potential. It’s a film where it’s ideas within the narrative are executed about as perfect as it could get. Even in an age where certain folks seem to decry the idea of films having important messages, Past Lives is a reminder why we need films like that, films that teaches us the true meaning of life and why we shouldn’t take or the ones we love for granted. If this is not a least nominated for Best Picture, then the Academy Awards can simply suck it. Give Greta Lee the Oscar right now!
3.) Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3
Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is able to successfully hit all the beats it needs to give fans and audiences a very satisfying ending to it’s trilogy of what is perhaps the Marvel Cinematic Universe’s most surprising and consistently great franchise, along with showing how Marvel can still find ways to deliver quality entertainment, even when it might seem like they’ve reached their limits. It’s able to be funny, dark, sad, engaging, and deliver the highest and most personal stakes of all the three Guardians films that helps make it stand out as possibly the very best in trilogy. I don’t think there was a scene that was as heartbreaking as Rocket watching his friends die right in front of him or as thrilling when the Guardians got together for that one kick-ass action scene with No Sleep ‘Til Brooklyn playing. I don’t know what the future holds for the MCU or what awaits for the team members that are still around to fight galactic wars but in the case of this movie, I don’t really care. All Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 needed to do for me was to deliver a conclusion that felt definite, right and satisfying all the same. And on those terms, it was no doubt able to deliver a famously huge third (Pun entirely intended!) I’m glad James Gunn was able to end his run with Marvel on a high note and leave me awaiting his future with DC. A fitting farewell to these lovable a-holes!
2.) Oppenheimer
To be honest, if were going by pure objective quality, this would probably be the very best film of the year for me. Oppenheimer is yet another masterfully made and directed film by the great Christopher Nolan himself, perhaps his biggest cinematic achievement to date. It’s able to tell exactly the kind of sprawling epic story that it aspires to be by acting as a character study first and a biopic second of the infamous man of J. Robert Oppenheimer himself. Every single member of it’s highly recognizable cast is able to completely disappear into their roles and captured their performances perfectly (RDJ better get that Oscar!), it does a great job of exploring the man of J. Robert Oppenheimer (played perfectly by Cillian Murphy) as not just “the destroyer of worlds” but as an impactful flawed man himself, the three hour runtime is put to near perfect use, the score is absolutely riveting and will haunt you in the best of ways, and is able to deliver fully on the theater experience in ways that no other filmmaker than Nolan can do. Even if this is Nolan going for his Oscar, he’s able to do it in such a perfect and organic way that it feels more earnest than forced (Take notes, Alejandro González Iñárritu!). While it’s not quite my favorite film from Nolan (Inception and The Dark Knight will always be very hard to top for me!), this might just be his most important one to date, showcasing why Christopher Nolan will always be a name to attract a mass audience. ! Speaking as someone that was underwhelmed by Dunkirk and Tenet, Oppenheimer is a glorious return to form for Christopher Nolan and perhaps might just be objectively the best film of 2023!
1.) Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse
But yeah, this was still my favorite one of the year! Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse shows that the Spider-Verse could in fact make lightning strike twice! Everyone involved with the making of this movie wanted to take everything to the next level without holding anything back and they are able to exceed greatly with a sequel that manages to be as good as Into the Spider-Verse and in some ways, even better. The animation might be the very best I’ve ever seen in any film, the entire cast is perfect with everyone feeling like they are absolutely in LOVE with their roles, Miles and Gwen are some of the most best, engaging, and most layered protagonists in any comic book film, the themes and morals of the story still resonate and fits the core elements of Spider-Man perfectly, and there’s plenty of well earned fan service throughout that never gets in the way of the main central storyline. There has not been a film this year I’ve rewatched more than Across the Spider-Verse and I will certainly continue to do so in the future. While it does end on an obvious cliffhanger, it will no doubt make anyone excited to see how they will wrap up the story in the third and final installment. This is the kind of film that not only proves that superhero films are still important (even after the year the subgenre as had) but animation is as important as well! Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse is my favorite film of 2023 and one of my favorite superhero movies of all time period! Bring on Beyond the Spider-Verse!
Also, to Phil Lord, Chris Miller, and the those at Sony Animation, PLEASE treat your animators right this time! Don’t put them through hell like you did with Across the Spider-Verse! We all can wait and be patience if it has to take a few more years for the next film to come out! Let’s not encourage crunch culture any longer and make sure the animators are treated with respect next time around! Please and thank you!
Adam's Blog 