Since I felt putting all 83 Marvel movies was a bit too much for one list, I decided to make a second post of it! That way, there’s most stability and this specific ranking doesn’t feel too clutter for one piece. My previous one was rankings from #83 to #36. This list will consist of #35 to #1!
No more time and filler! Let’s finish this MASSIVE movie ranking!
Argylle is quite a strange movie to talk about. Not only because of how shockingly dishonest the market campaign has been by putting the spotlight on the wrongs actors and not the ones that are actually leading the picture. It’s more that I’m not entirely sure how to describe this movie without sounding like a complete lunatic. If I were to tell any sane individual what actually happens in this movie, they would probably tell me I was out of my mind and go into this movie without believing such nonsense.
And make no sense, Argylle is complete nonsense. It’s too long, juggling so many different ideas that it doesn’t know what to do with, and contains so many twists and turns that it will likely make your head spin. But, it also has ridiculously stylish action scenes, two fun leads with great chemistry with one another, a talented cast, whether playing big or small roles, having a ball, and has such an unapologetic “I don’t give a f, I’m playing by my own rules!” tone throughout that it’s nearly impossible to be bored by it. So, yeah! It may not be technically good but I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy myself. At the end of the day, that’s what matter the most, right?!
Premise: Reclusive author Elly Conway (Bryce Dallas Howard) writes best-selling espionage novels about a secret agent named Argylle (Henry Cavill) who’s on a mission to unravel a global spy syndicate. However, when the plots of her books start to mirror the covert actions of a real-life spy organization, the line between fiction and reality begin to blur. Elly must team up with Aidan (Sam Rockwell) to stop a devious organization known as the Division, led by Ritter (Bryan Cranston), before they corrupt her whole life and career as an author.
So, yeah. That should tell you right there that this movie may not be what the marketing has been selling you as. Instead of playing like a Henry Cavill and John Cena buddy cop vehicle along with Dua Lipa being along for the ride, it’s more like a twisty, espionage-like version of The Lost City, where the main characters learns what she thought was writing for fiction was really writing for truth. As the catchphrase in the film goes, “the greater the spy, the greater the lie”.
Films like this is always commendable. Not just because it’s technically an “original” film but also because it allows for imaginative creative forces like Matthew Vaughn getting to show off his best moves for the whole road to see. However, whereas the original Kingsman: The Secret Service (Still Vaughn’s best film to date!) was able to thrive with that creative, over-the-top energy being the driving force, Argyille gets rather muddled by it.
Thankfully, while not being the true front-and-center like the poster would have you believe, Bryce Dallas Howard and Sam Rockwell make for a great likable main duo that helps keep the picture steady. They have nice chemistry with one another, with plenty of nice back-and-forth banter with one another that brings back the good old days where men and women could be equal action stars together. Howard, in particular, is surprisingly convincing as an action star and gets plenty of set pieces herself to kick some butt that makes her character’s rather bizarre arc and transformation even remotely believable. I would say the same for good old Sam Rockwell but at this point, I think everyone should know by now that there is not one role which this man can NOT do.
The action in general is where Vaughn’s is able to be at his most creative and comes the closest of capturing that same lightning in a bottle that he did with the original Kingsman. It’s the type of action that might sound stupid when saying it out loud but watching in motion, I couldn’t help but be captivated whenever they were happening. The main highlight in particular is the one major scene where Bryce Dallas Howard basically proves she is born to be an action star of not just behind the camera but in front of it as well. There are times to where it does get distracted by some pretty darn noticeable CGI (although nothing as outrageous as say….CGI Henry Cavill) but the sequences themselves are when the film gets it’s most energy.
Where the film falters is unfortunately from the script department. Despite clearly wanting to be homage to traditional spy thrillers with it’s out of nowhere reveals and throwing in plenty of twists and surprises, it makes the whole lore and universe building much more convoluted than it needs to be. There is a lot that is thrown at you with each 180 that the film decides to flip that even thinking about for a single minute will make you realize how little this holds up under scrutiny. Had Argylle been a brief two hours at max, it might have been able to get away with that. However, with a runtime of nearly two hours and twenty minutes and so much time dedicated to it’s overly complicated plot, it simply doesn’t work.
It’s also rather bizarre how this film isn’t a strict-R rating. With most of Vaughn’s prior filmography consisting of mature material like Kick-Ass and of course, Kingsman, what excuse was there to not have this be R-rated. Was it because of the 200 million dollar budget and Apple feeling having an R rating would hurt those sales? Beats me but despite the film doing the best it can, Argylle comes across as more tame because of it’s PG-13 rating and never can let Vaughn’s unhinged vision come to life because of it.
Argylle is definitely a film that is easy to dislike. From the misleading marketing to it’s rather bizarre plot to it’s tame rating, there are plenty of reasons to not be a fan of it. However, I would be denying I didn’t enjoy myself with what I got despite of these glaring issues. The action is still fun and creative, the cast (despite not being in the roles you may like) are entertaining, and there’s so much thrown at you throughout it’s 139 minute long runtime that it’s impossible to be bored by it. And considering the lack of original IPs in this day and age, I always love to give props to films that try to offer something different even if it falters a bit.
At best, Argylle plays like a water-down Kingsman, which occasional reminiscence of Matthew Vaughn’s better days but in this case, I’ll take what I can get. Perhaps check this movie out on a discount Tuesday or something and see if it’s worth your time. Anything to save the theater experience!
Other thoughts:
The Cat is the real MVP of the picture!
Henry Cavill’s hair is whatever the exact opposite of MVP is!
If Taylor Swift really wrote the story here, then that cat must TOTALLY have been her idea!
FYI, about that post credit scene! No, Matthew Vaughn! Just no!
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