Ranking The Mad Max Franchise

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga is now out in theaters! Because of that, it’s time for another new ranking on this blog. This time, we will be ranking the Mad Max franchise! However, I’m not just going to rank every single film installment. I will also include the Mad Max video game that came out in 2015! Why you may ask? Because it’s a dope game and deserves to be included in this messed up canon of a universe?!

Anyways, let’s hope right into the list of the Mad Max franchise from worst to best! Also, Happy Memorial Day!

6.) Mad Max

Yes, the worst that the Mad Max universe has to offer is in fact the original Mad Max, which is also the only film in the series to put the full spotlight on him and not those around him. This is when George Miller had yet to find an actual identity for the franchise that he created along with discovering his own talents as a filmmaker. The pacing is sluggish, the action lacks tensions because of how rubbish it’s filmed, and despite being considered a “revenge” movie, it’s not until the last 20 or so minutes when Max does in fact give revenge for his family’s death. While those sequences are awesome, it happens way too late in the film, delivering little payoff to a whole lot of setup. Thankfully, it’s by the end where Max finds himself in the wasteland, which is also when the franchise finds it’s own identity.

5.) Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome

There are many folks that point to Beyond Thunderdome, the final film in the series with Mel Gibson as the title character, as the low point of the series, sighting it’s cartoon-like nature and more kid friendly tone as being the reasons why. Oh, and the annoying little kids don’t help either! While all of that is partially true, it still delivers in terms of car chases, production design, costumes, and Mel Gibson’s beautiful hair in it. Not to mention, Tina Turner singing “We Don’t Need Another Hero.” It’s undoubtedly cheesy but at least there’s always something happening on screen that makes it hard to be bored by, as compared to the first movie. It’s definitely a mixed bag but the good news is that the post-Mel Gibson Mad Max films (and one game) would go on to learn the “right” lessons from this and ignore all the wrong ones.

4.) Mad Max (2015) Video Game

Yes, there was a Mad Max game that came out in 2015. The main reason you might not know about it may have to do with the fact that this released the same day as Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain (A dull and boring game btw!). What stinks because this is actually one of the better IP exclusive games in recent memory. Taking cues from hit games such as Batman: Arkham Asylum and Grand Theft Auto V, Mad Max (2015) the video game really makes you feel like the title character. You just have all the fun in the world driving the Magnum Opus, beating up war boys, collecting scraps and goodies, and taking down the enemies towers along the way. Also at his heart is a core story about Max trying to fight his way through the wasteland and find somewhere where he can be at peace at long last, leaving the memories of his fallen loved ones behind him. Oh, and the main bad guy in this game is Immortan Joe’s son, who also showed up in Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga. It’s far from the most revolutionary gameplay out there but if you need your Mad Max fix after Fury Road and Furiosa, this should do you well!

3.) Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

This is the first film in the series to not have Max himself in a main role (although he has one glorious blink-and-you-miss-it cameo and instead acts as the origin story of the star from Fury Road in Furiosa. Even so, it still remains a superb action packed spectacle that offers a further expansion of the Furiosa character and more depth into the insane world of Mad Max itself. It manages to tell a compelling origin story for it’s lead heroine that stands strong in it’s own right, Anya-Taylor Joy is able to fill in the shoes for Charlize Theron greatly, Chris Hemsworth is having the time of his life playing the main bad guy in Dementus, and it just makes for a perfect counterpart to it’s already perfect successor in Mad Max: Fury Road. Oh, and some nice little easter eggs and nods to the Mad Max (2015) video game is always welcome! It may not quite reach the height of Fury Road (or even The Road Warrior for that matter) but oh man, is it fun to watch George Miler try to top himself the whole way through. If this really is the beginning of the end of movie theaters as we know it, then I’m at least glad we are going out with bangs like like Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga

2.) Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior

Before Fury Road managed to raise the standards of actions movies in the 2010s, The Road Warrior was able to do that first for actions movies in the 1980s. This was when you can tell that George Miller was fully at home with this franchise and Mel Gibson had slipped comfortably in his role as Max Rockatany. The story structures feels more much organic, the action and chase scenes have more weight and energy to them, the exploration of the post-apocalyptic wasteland is intriguing to explore, and it does a great job of leading into the sheer madness and craziness that would become a staple for this franchise. This is also what set the formula for the sequels of the stories not actually being about Max himself but the others that are around him and how he goes about helping them through others troubles. Max might not be able to prevent the tragic past that he had to endure but that doesn’t mean he has to let others have the same faith. It might have took a second try but The Road Warrior is when the series was able to unlock it’s true potential with it’s action, set pieces, and world building. However, it still only walked so that the next one could run over 30 years later.

1.) Mad Max: Fury Road

If you want to talk about the Mad Max series at it’s finest and just action blockbuster filmmaking in general, look no further than Mad Max: Fury Road. This is hands down the best film in this franchise because of the high near impossible standards that it was able to reach and lead by examples. The action is absolutely spectacular in every sense of the word, there is tension, suspense, and momentum felt throughout it’s entire runtime, the practical effects is able to blend together with the VFX work perfectly, every single cast member is on top form here, the stunt work and editing is some of the best I’ve ever seen for a blockbuster, the score is absolutely mesmerizing, Tom Hardy is able to take over for Mel Gibson as Max without much shortcomings, and Furiosa, played perfectly by Charlize Theron, is one of the best female protagonists in cinema history, so much so that it’s basically more of her movie than it is Max’s but you don’t care one bit because of how great and compelling she is. Mad Max: Fury Road is a film that is perfect no matter what way you look at. Whether it’s as an action-packed spectacle, a visual and character driven story, a further look into the wasteland of Mad Max, or as a feminist think piece, Mad Max: Fury Road remains one of the best and most perfect films of the 21st century. Even if Mad Max: The Wasteland or another Mad Max film never gets made, let’s at least be glad we got to witness George Miller craft a Magnum Opus of his own. And we all could not be better for it!

Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga (2024) Movie Review- George Miller’s Odyssey

For anyone that follows the movie industry and knows how the film making process works, you know that most films based off of well-known IPs tend to be micromanaged to high hell by the studio executives. Sure, if it’s a franchise that is guaranteed a profit based off the name alone and is directed by someone with a reputation of making crowd pleasing blockbusters on budget and on time, they might get a pass. However, more times than not, it’s always the studio execs and producers that have the final say on the finished product, at the expense of the cast and crew that work on it.

All of that reason and more is why it’s a miracle that Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga even exists in the first place. It’s a prequel of Mad Max: Fury Road, a movie, which despite all the praise it got and the Oscars it won, barley squeaked a profit and made George Miller go to war with Warner Bros to allow Furiosa along with another potential Mad Max: sequel to even happen. This isn’t a film that exists because it’s something that Warner Bros desperately wanted to greenlight. It’s a film that exists because George Miller fought his neck and teeth for to get made. And if the early box office results of Furiosa are anything to go by, George Miller was able to win the battle while Warner Bros will likely lose the war.

If this really is the beginning of the end of movie theaters as we know it, then I’m at least glad we are going out with bangs like like Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga. A glorious action packed spectacle that offers a further expansion of the Furiosa character, more depth into the insane world of Mad Max, telling a compelling origin story that stands strong in it’s own right, and makes for a perfect counterpart to it’s already perfect successor in Mad Max: Fury Road. It may not quite reach the height of Fury Road but oh man, is it fun to watch George Miler try to top himself the whole way through.

Premise: Snatched from the Green Place of Many Mothers, young Furiosa (Alyla Browne) falls into the hands of a great biker horde led by the warlord Dementus (Chris Hemsworth). Sweeping through the Wasteland, they come across the Citadel, presided over by the Immortan Joe. As the two tyrants fight for dominance, Furiosa (Anya Taylor-Joy) soon finds herself in a nonstop battle to make her way home.

The first thing you need to know right off the bat about Furiosa is that it’s a COMPLETELY different beast than Mad Max: Fury Road. While they may look and sound similar, both films present very different and unique ways to tell their story. Whereas Fury Road relied on it’s nonstop action and immersive visuals to tell it’s story, Furiosa has Miller taking another deliberate approach with a film that acts more as a character study about Furiosa, with a slower pace and focus on world building than it’s predecessor did. The film no doubt delivers enough action and explosions to those that crave those in their summer blockbuster but at heart, this is a character driven story about a fierce woman being caught in the middle of war with two distinct sides.

The film is divided into three separate acts (or five different chapters, at the film points out), all three of which are able to tell their own distinct story. We have the entire first act that puts the focus on Furiosa as a child (played WONDERFULLY by Alyla Browne) when she got taking away from her home by Dementus and the Biker Horde. We have the second act that shows Furiosa raised through a teenager to adulthood by Immortan Joe and the Citidial along with getting caught between their war against the Biker Horde. And then there’s the third act which has Furiosa seeing vengeance against Dementus for taking away everything she’s ever loved and transforms into the Furiosa that we all remember from Mad Max: Fury Road. All three acts are engaging, all three acts tell their story at their own paced, and all three acts has a payoff of some sort by the end of it. That is multilayered storytelling if I’ve ever seen it!

Even if some may balk at the fact that it’s a prequel and we already know ahead of time the outcomes of certain characters, there is still a complete story told her and a complete arc for our main heroine that is developed every step of the way. It allows the traits and events we already know will happen to Furiosa in a very organic way. These events help with the development of the character and don’t just feel like a checklist of things to happen because it’s a prequel (*cough* How Han Solo got his name in Solo: A Star Wars Story!). Not only does Furiosa not tarnish Mad Max: Fury Road in any way, it actually enhances that masterpiece, adding even more layers and details to it than ever before. When watching both films back-to-back alongside each other, it’s gonna feel natural and make both experiences feel like one complete picture.

The performances are about as pitch perfect as it comes. While I can give it all the credit in the world to Anya Taylor-Joy that is able to nail the fierce nature that Charlize Theron captured so well in Fury Road, a special shout out has to go to Alyla Browne. She’s able to carry the first act as well as a child actor possibly can, being as silent and stoic as you would likely expect a 10-year old Furiosa to be like. She does it so well you almost don’t mind waiting for Anya Taylor-Joy to show up because how captivating she is on screen. Of course, Anya Taylor-Joy is just as equally great as well, selling herself well as not just one of the best young actresses working today but also someone capable of holding an action role. She’s not on the level as Charlize Theron but I can definitely see her being on that level two decades from now if Hollywood is still able to make these action movies by then.

Other notable shoutouts go to the likes of Josh Helman’s Scrotus (who fans of the Mad Max (2015) video game should remember), Nathan Jones’s Erectus, and Tom Burke’s Prateorian Jack, all three of which are able to give convincing performances as either raging mad mans (mostly the first two) or one of the fearless but noble good men out there (mostly the third one). You also can’t forget Charlee Fraser’s spectacularly badass turn as Furiosa’s mommy. I won’t go much further than that but let’s just say you can more than understand why Furiosa became the badass that she is.

However, no other actor is able to steal the scenery her than Chris Hemsworth as the main antagonist Dementus. Hemsworth already proved himself worthy (no pun intended) of playing a fun bad guy in Bad Times At The El Royale (which you should see right now if you haven’t already) but he takes to a whole another level here. Able to fine that perfect balance of vile, unhinged charisma and being an intimating threat every step of the way. There’s even a good 10 to 15 minutes stretch that puts the full spotlight on him and you don’t care one bit because of how awesome of a presence he is here. It’s like Hemsworth took the criticism of Thor: Love and Thunder to hard and wanted to make his turn as Dementus that stands out greater than in any Marvel movie he has ever done. While the box office may not show that, this proves that he does not need the Disney scenery to pull off a great performance.

While Furiosa is not quite as action heavy as Fury Road, it still really delivers here. The set pieces, stunt work, cinematography, and just about ANYHING revolving around the action is Oscar caliber here. The car chase sequences are as every bit as intense and exciting as they were in Fury Road, taking you on this crazy ride as you find yourself biting your teeth in regards to the fate of the characters while also being gloriously entertained in the process. Even though he’s approaching 80 years old, it’s incredible how Miller continues to find new and exciting way of creating action sequences that will make you want to rewatch it over and over and over again.

It’s also quite cool how well this is respectful to not just the previous Mad Max films but also the Mad Max (2015) video game as well. As I said before, fans of the game will know that Scrotus was the main antagonist of that game and is actually the son of Immortan Joe, basically solidifying that game in this latest Mad Max canon. There’s some fun little easter eggs and nods to that game which will likely put in you in the mood to play it after seeing the more or play it for the first time if you haven’t already.

The score by Junkie XL, aka Tom Holkenborg, is as inspired and perfect in the moment as it was in Mad Max: Fury Road, the cinematography by Simon Duggan captures the look of the wasteland very well, the editing by Eliot Knapman and Margaret Sixel will certainly lands some awards come Oscar season, and even if the CGI and VFX work are admittedly more noticeable here than it was in Fury Road, they blend better with the practical effects when watching the film onscreen in theaters as oppose as to just watching the trailer on YouTube.

What keeps Furiosa from being as grand or impressive as Fury Road has to do with not feeling as air tight as that film was and having a bit more baggage to carry. There are times where the pacing can be a bit inconsistent, with a first act that feel slower with having to set the groundwork for the latter two acts and Furiosa’s revenge arc wrapping up a beat or two more quickly than it should have been. And even if it manages to avoid most of the trappings that prequels usually gain, there are some elements that don’t quite get as explored as they should, likely because we already know ahead of a time of the fate of certain characters. In this case, I would have like to see more interactions between Praetorian Jack and Furiosa. It’s hinted that Jack as the closest thing that Furiosa has ever had to a male love interest but in context of the film, comes across as just another man that she is forced to tag along with for the fate of her survival. (Spoiler alert: That would NOT be the last time!)

Even so, the fact that George Miller had to give everything to not just make Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga as great as it is but even get it made at all is proof how much the world of Mad Max means to the man. Regardless if it’s with Mad Max or another character themselves, this world is able to make the best use out of Mr. Miller as a filmmaker outside of anything to do with animated penguins that’s NOT related to Madagascar. Even if you basically see these last two Mad Max films as a metaphor as to where films are heading now that theaters are losing money, at least the man is able to get the chance to show us all a great taste of his imagination. And man does it taste good!

I don’t know if we’ll get another Mad Max movie or not but even so, I will gladly put Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga and Mad Max: Fury Road greatly alongside one another. These films should be seen as a textbook example of how to make compelling action films. From the set pieces to the fight chorography to the stunt work to the visuals to the story to the characters to the themes to the soundtrack, these are both perfect examples of well-crafted films and the kind of ones I will always support at the bottom of my heart, even when they are not perfect. While I don’t think Furiosa is quite perfect, I will look for any excuse to take a look into George Miller’s Odyssey.

This is George Miller’s world and we are all living in it in ways we really couldn’t imagine!

Other comments:

  • Yes, Mad Max does make a cameo in this! Yes, it’s about as blink-and-miss as you would imagine!

  • And seriously, go play the Mad Max (2015) video game if you haven’t already! It rules!

  • Also, special shoutout to Quarden Bayles as War Boy! I wish that young man the best of everything in the world! For what I’ve seen and heard about him, I hope he is given proper care and respect in his life, especially after the roles he played in this film and Three Thousand Years of Longing.

Why Animators Need To Go On Strike

It has been announced that Pixar will be laying off 14% of current employees due to Disney’s cost-cutting measures. This will be the biggest restructuring in Pixar’s history. Even after undergoing similar layoffs last year, which included Galyn Susman, the woman who helped keep Toy Story 2 at bay during production, yet another restructure is occurring at the offices of Pixar. Never mind the fact that last year’s Elemental was able to squeeze a profit after it’s incredibly strong legs or that Inside Out 2 is set to have the biggest opening weekend at the box office in 2024 so far! Neither one of those elements were enough to continue letting talented animators get the hammer!

Unfortunately, this has not been the only layoffs in recent memory within the animation industry. Back in March, shortly after Kung Fu Panda 4 had a strong opening weekend at the box office, DreamWorks had announced massive layoffs with their company as well. Even more so than the ones with Pixars, DreamWorks confirmed that many departments were cut in half and the creative staff on movies were to be reduced at least up to 50%. Yes, around HALF of the creative staff at DreamWorks were laid off a few months ago. Never mind the fact that Kung Fu Panda 4 had a solid opening weekend at the box office and has managed to gross over 530 million worldwide, becoming the second highest grossing Kung Fu Panda sequel domestically and even outgrossing the previous Kung Fu Panda installment. Not to mention, the lower 85 million dollar budget that certainly allowed for higher revenue that perhaps any other Kung Fu Panda movie to date. None of that was enough to save DreamWorks from being forced to clean house and restructure their entire company.

There are multiple reasons why this is all occurring to not only within the animation industry but nearly all forms of entertainment in general. Mediums underperforming or tanking at the box office and/or sales, bloated budgets that makes return outcome nearly impossible, rushed development cycles which artists are constantly overworked and crunched for times, etc.. However, I do think the #1 reason behind all of this has to do with the higher ups of these studios. In the cases I just mentioned, Disney and Universal.

If you have been seeing how technology is becoming more advanced by the day, you likely are familiar with the way A.I. has been playing a bigger role now than before. With artificial intelligence features such as ChatGPT becoming more common in every day use, it’s clear that studios are looking to have that be more incorporated to the way entertainment is made now. Not for the sake of quality but for the sake of quantity. Companies want A.I. to play a big role now because it will save them extra bucks in not having to hire more animators or artists. That way, more and more money can be made that can light their own pockets and NOT be spend on actual content themselves.

Many people find it blasphemy that big studios and companies are still trying to convert A.I. into their products at the expense of actual human beings after going through at least two major strikes because of that push. However, it just doesn’t matter in the eyes of the higher ups. They don’t know how to shortened the budgets of their content that doesn’t involve laying off a good portion of their employees. They just think A.I. is the big answer to all of their problems. Not because they want to experiment on different ways to make new forms of entertainment but because that will save them a few extra pennies. It’s about as greedy, corporate, and cynical as they come.

All of those reasons and more is why whenever the contract inevitably expires this year between the Animation Guide and the Alliance of Motion Picture and Television Producers (AMPTP), a strike is going to 100% occur. It’s not a WANT per se but an absolute NEED for both sides, if the future of animation is to thrive in the best way it can. Companies need to learn that they can NOT take animators for granted and needs them to provide quality entertainment.

Even if you take out the constant push for A.I., the animation industry has been infamous with it’s troubled production with films in recent memory. You have Across the Spider-Verse which had animators being treated extremely poorly by Phil Lord, causing hundreds of animators to leave the project. You have Kung Fu Panda 4 which had plenty of back and forth between the creatives and being rushed out of door during the multiple strikes to get out by spring. And do I even need to bring up the development history surrounding Frozen 2, which had a Disney Plus documentary in which the people who made it unironically state that they were overworked, crunched, and was basically making the whole movie up as they went along. And I can only imagine the stories we will be hearing about Moana 2, the Disney Plus series turned movie, during the holiday season this year?

Working in the animation industry or any entertainment industry is certainly hard and requires you to be working a TON to get each project out on time. But it should never come at the cost of someone’s mental health, insanity, or skills as a human being. You might be able to get away with that once or twice but to have EVERY production in animation going this way is a big no-no. That’s how you wind up with something like Megamind 2, that was litter with animation errors that became noticeable to anyone once the very first trailer dropped. Not only is the poor treatment for animators along with this constant push for A.I. to take over is affecting the work-life balance of animators but also the quality of animated motion pictures. And once you got so many of those poor quality animated films in a row, eventually people will catch on and your movies will end up bombing at the box office. Just ask Disney with Wish!

Yes, there has been plenty of great animated work as of late, regardless of their production history, but more times than not, these rushed developments cycles, harsh treatment of animators, and wanted to replace them with robots is causing major harm to the animation industry. At some point, you as an animator has to put your foot down and stand up to the studio saying “No! You will just not tolerate any longer! Treat us with the respect we deserve or we go on strike!” While it’s unlikely that will occur on it’s own, the soon-to-be expired contract between the Animation Guide and the AMPTP will certainly make the voices of animators be heard. And there is not better time for them to start speaking up than now!

Just like how actors and writers had every right to go on strike last year, animators deserve that very right! With big companies performing layoffs within the industry in the hopes of avoiding a strike, that is only going to throw more fuel into the fire. Laying off hundreds to thousands of animators in the hopes of giving those extra bucks to those that deserve it is NOT the answer! Replacing those animators with robots is NOT the answer! Putting the animators through hell with every single animation production is also NOT the answer! The only answer is to give them the proper care, treatment, and respect that they deserve to deliver the best quality creative product that they can!

It’s only then that animators may not have to strike. However, in this case and under THESE circumstances right now, they have more than earn their right to do so once they get the chance!

May 21st, 2013- The Day That Xbox Died

Imagine being in Microsoft’s position on this day back in 2013. Coming high off your successful run with the Xbox 360, you have all the optimism in the world in showcasing your next console for the eight generation of gaming. By taking perfect advantage of Sony’s failed launch of the PlayStation 3, you were able to stream roll passed your opponent and make yourself the grand face of gaming for the seventh generation of gaming and now aim to do so for the foreseeable future.

You have the chance to shock the world in amazement, proving that you are still very much at the top of your game. By just making good first impressions with your latest console, you are pretty much guaranteed to win another console war or at least make yourself competitive. Nintendo is struggling big time with their Wii U and Sony is most likely gonna play it as safe as imaginable with their console reveal. This latest console war within the eight generation of consoles is not yours to win but yours to lose.

Taking in all of those facts, you would think that the reveal of their newest console should be the easy win in the books. All you have to do is take what worked about your previous console, improve on aspects that didn’t work as strong, showed off the advancement in technology, and be sure to show your exclusive games and features that gamers can NOT get with a Wii U or PlayStation 4, and then…..bingo!. Do at least two or three of those things strongly with your reveal and you are pretty much guarantee another successful generation. Was Microsoft able to do just that on this exact day over 11 years ago? No, no they did not whatsoever.

The reveal of the Microsoft’s eight generation console known as the Xbox One has to be one of the worst reveals of a gaming console of all time, if not the absolute worst! Microsoft and former CEO Don Mattrick did just about the exact opposite of what you are suppose to do for a consumer product reveal. It was a reveal that was so bad that it not only lost them the eight generational console war by default to Sony but it practically damaged Microsoft’s brand for the foreseeable future, losing over half of their customers and still suffering the consequences to this day for a console reveal that happened over a decade ago. How exactly could Microsoft screw up of what should’ve been the easiest console reveal in history? Well, it’s a real step-by-step process that I would like to go over in complete detail.

“Xbox One?!” Really?!

The first misstep was the title of the console itself, Xbox One. That is about the worst and most confusing title imaginable for Microsoft’s newest console. The Xbox One wasn’t even Microsoft’s first Xbox and by this point, was their third iteration of the Xbox. You could have just gone with the easy name such as Xbox 720 or Xbox Infinity or any name that makes your console identifiable but really Xbox One?! That just makes it seem easy for someone to mistake the Xbox One as referring to the original Xbox and NOT the Xbox that Microsoft was releasing for the eighth generation. After all, there are still people to this day that believe the Wii U was just an add-on to the original Wii.

According to Microsoft, the reason why the console was called Xbox One was because they wanted to market their console as an “all-in-one entertainment system”. It wasn’t just about showing off the next evolution of gaming but showing off the next evolution of entertainment in general. While that is certainly ambitious to include so many features onto what is suppose to be a video game console (We’ll get DEEP into that later!), that doesn’t really justify calling it Xbox One. That still opens to door for major confusion among consumers who probably mistake the Xbox One as referring to the very first Xbox or thinking that’s some add on to the Xbox 360 (Again there are still folks that don’t believe the Wii U was a real console).

Unfortunately, the dumb console name was the least of the mistakes that Microsoft made on this day back in 2013!

Is This A TV Console Or A Video Game Console?

Despite the Xbox One intending to be the next upcoming console for video games for Microsoft, video games seemed to be the last thing on their mind when revealing their latest product. As a matter of fact, games weren’t even talking about until over halfway through the presentation. I’m dead serious!

Instead a good majority of focus were spent on the television features that Microsoft look to include to add to the entertainment experience with the Xbox One. Whether it’s for streaming services or watching regular television, this reveal was all about showing the multiple different ways that you can watch your favorite shows, movies, or sporting events. If you were to take a sip for every time the word “TV” was mentioned throughout the entire reveal, you would be so drunk that you likely think you have 12 fingers, 15 toes, and 5 d**ks/v***as by the end of this awful console reveal.

Sure, the 360 had tv elements to it as well but Microsoft knew throughout that entire console run that it was a gaming console first and everything else second. I don’t know if it’s because Microsoft wanted to showcase elements that Sony was unlikely going to have with the PlayStation 4 but the entire Xbox One reveal felt more like a reveal of a new movie player and/or streaming service than it did of a legit video game console.

Always Online Along With Multiple DRM Restrictions

Once the focus actually went to the gaming feature of the console, Microsoft initially announced that the Xbox One would require internet connection 24/7, even for single player games that don’t require online service. As if that wasn’t enough, they also said that you would not be able to share games easily with friends and family, requiring you to follow an overly complicated set of rules to reserve your copy of the game, share it with others, or even sell it.

For example, you would only be able to share a certain game with a friend who you have had on your friend list for 30 days and each game could only be shared one time. If you want to talk about consumer annihilation at it’s finest, look no further than this initial feature for the Xbox One.

Even taken away the fact that following those guidelines would results in constant absolute messes with online services, that is about the most anti-consumer way to sell your product imaginable. Microsoft was basically trying to get gamers to play their games THEIR way and not the way the gamer likes to. That would be like being fed a diner meal at a restaurant but you were only require to eat it in the exact way that the workers there tell you to do. You can’t force costumers to like your product the way you want to, they can only like your products the way THEY want to.

This had to be the most arrogant thing Microsoft could have possibly did when revealing the Xbox One. After the Xbox 360, they thought everyone would roll over for them like an adorable puppy and go along with everything they want. Instead, this was one of the many features that killed public interest in the Xbox One from the day it was revealed.

Lack Of Backwards Compatibility/Used Games

As if the confusing ways to play new games on the Xbox One wasn’t bad enough, Microsoft wouldn’t even allow for backwards compatibility for games on the 360 or even used games on the Xbox One. You couldn’t play prior games on the previous console on the Xbox One nor could you get used games or even rented disc copies to play on the system. If you were someone that was looking to save money for a Xbox One by selling your 360 with the mindset it would support 360 games, you were screwed. If you were someone that wanted to hold off on the newest Xbox One game you were looking forward to and wanted to wait until there was a cheaper, used copy at your local GameStop, well you were screwed too.

Microsoft claims that the reason for this move was that they wanted to push forward with the ways to game instead of going backwards. From that reason alone, it sounds more like they were going backwards with their way of thinking than in the ways of gaming. A main selling point of a new console is that it would show support towards prior games of the prior console. It also helps to be able to access a copy from a friend or a disc rental from Game Fly to try out the games to see if you want to spent your hard earned money on it. And that’s not even going into how previous games from the previous console can help the support of a newest console in it’s early days without relying strictly on launch titles. Yet again, this was another simple aspect to get right and yet again Microsoft botch it completely.

What About The Games?

If you were to ask anyone what actual games got revealed during the Xbox One showing, I don’t think anyone would have an exact answer for you. As I said earlier, games seemed to be the last thing on Microsoft’s mind when talking about the features of the Xbox One. Outside of your typical games such as Call of Duty, Madden NFL, and Halo, there was virtually ZERO Xbox One exclusives to get people excited to purchasing a Xbox One console.

To be as fair as I can, this reveal did take place about a few weeks before E3. While it’s understandable that Microsoft didn’t want to completely blow their load at once, they needed to least showcase something other than the typical FPS and Sports Games that gamers have grown accustomed too. Just something to make the games at Xbox One stand out more compare to games on their previous consoles. However, that was not the case whatsoever. Video game consoles are all suppose to be about the games first and everything else second. The fact that Microsoft didn’t get that memo while developing this mess of a console made them put their own writing on their own wall.

Humiliation At E3

While Microsoft did try to response to their disastrous reveal by focusing more on gaming exclusives for E3, they still refused to change anything about their piece of software they were selling. You still have the overreliance on television/streaming features, you still have the required online connection, you still have the confusing ways to be able to play or share your games, you still didn’t have the option to play Xbox 360 games or used games, and you hardly had any exclusive to look forward to for the Xbox One. This is setting up your gaming console for failure if I’ve ever seen one.

Although I have been talking nonstop about Microsoft and the awful way they promote the Xbox One, what about Sony and their PlayStation 4? How did they respond to that? Well, by performing the most embarrassing beat down imaginable. Nearly every single thing that Microsoft did wrong, Sony did right spectacularly.

They put big focus on the software and the multiple ways to play games, they didn’t try to force online restrictions or drms down the throats of consumers, they didn’t try to make the gaming experience more convoluted and confusing than it needed to be, they allowed for anyone to play any game on the PS4 regardless if the disc is old or new, they allowed for PS3 software on the PS4, and they were also selling the console at a reasonable $400, as opposed to the Xbox One’s sale of $500. If the Xbox One reveal was the most anti-consumer reveal imaginable, the PlayStation 4 reveal was the most pro-consumer reveal imaginable.

If you don’t believe me, just look at these two videos right here of Sony sticking it to Microsoft right up every single of their greedy little asses.

Don Mattrick Telling Those Who Didn’t Have Internet To Go F**K Themselves

As if nearly every single possible aspect with this reveal and E3 could not have gotten worse for Microsoft, the real nail in the coffin was the response that former Microsoft CEO Don Mattrick gave as a response to those that were unable to play games online for the Xbox One. He basically said that those that don’t have an internet connection can just go get an Xbox 360. I’m not even joking.

Do I even need to say anymore?!

The Aftermath

After a reveal and E3 event that had people jaws hit the floor in complete utter disbelief, Microsoft realized they had no other choice but to cave in and give the people what they wanted from the beginning. About a few weeks after E3 2013, Microsoft responded to the overwhelming backlash of the Xbox One by dropping the DRM charges and online restrictions entirely. Nearly every element that drew instant criticism was dropped entirely. The online services/check ins would not be required, you were allowed to play and share your games the way you want to, backward capabilities and used games would be supported, and there would be directed licensing changes to make games more accessible to the Xbox One. It was the only possible thing they could have done to save face. Unfortunately for Microsoft, the damage had already been done.

Even taken away the fact that the Xbox One still contained it’s confusing titles, too much commitment to non-gaming features, and very little commitment to the actual gaming features, the PlayStation 4 was able to sell leagues above the Xbox One at launch and would literally never look back for the remainder of the eight generational console war.

The latest accurate report confirms that Microsoft has sold 58 million Xbox One consoles, while Sony has sold over 117 million PlayStation 4 consoles. That alone gives perfect confirmation that PlayStation 4 did in fact range on top over the Xbox One for the eight generation console war, with Sony emerging victorious. And that’s not even going into detail about how the amount of Xbox One sold is at least 26 million short compared to the Xbox 360 or even how the PlayStation 4 eventually surpassed the Xbox 360 in total sales. Not only did Sony bested Microsoft in the present and future but they also went back to the past and bested them there too. That’s is butt kicking 101 at it’s absolute finest!

And if you are wondering how Microsoft latest ninth generational console has fared with the Xbox Series X/S (I still get confused with that title as well!), it’s not fared much better. While the handling of that console was nowhere near as bad as with the Xbox One, some of their biggest fatal flaws from that console would eventually carry over.

From still too much focus on other entertainment assets such as televisions and music to not enough intriguing exclusives or IPs to doing jack s*it with the exclusives and IPs from companies that they actually bought to it’s confusing as hell console titles, unable to tell the difference between which is which, the Xbox Series X/S was not the answer they were looking for, following their humiliating defeat in the eight generation. To this day, I still am confused on what the Xbox Series is even to suppose to be. And when I’m confused about something that should be so simple, then that must mean the majority of the human population would feel the same way.

And when it comes to the overall sales thus far. The Xbox Series X/S has sold just 21 million consoles to date while the PlayStation 5 has sold nearly 60 million consoles. That’s not to say that the PlayStation 5 has been completely perfect either but it’s the greatest console ever compared to whatever the hell that the Xbox Series whatever is suppose to be. Because of that and more, there is no doubt that Sony is walking away with the console war crown once again for the ninth generation.

In Conclusion

To say that Microsoft is still feeling the consequences of the Xbox One reveal would be an understatement. By fumbling the bag so badly on what should have been the most easiest sell for a console ever, they made just about every single mistake they could have possibly made. Whether it was motivated by greed, arrogance, or just plain stupidity, that not only caused Microsoft to lose the seventh generational console war to Sony but basically all future consoles wars as well.

Microsoft had all the motivation in the world coming into the seventh generation of consoles. They were able to take full advantages of Sony’s disastrous PlayStation 3 launch by steamrolling them throughout the six to seven year console window, providing the best possible gaming experience they could do players all around the world. Yet, somehow and someway, they completely shot themselves in the foot with the Xbox One, causing major damage to their brand back in 2013 and still to this day in the year 2024.

Microsoft has try multiple ways of keeping up the pace with Sony. They replaced Don Mattrick as CEO with Phil Spencer, they’ve tried buying other IPs and gaming companies out there, and they are trying to write every previous wrong they possibly can. Unfortunately, none of that has been enough to not just compete with Sony throughout the past decade but not even be in the same ballpark as them or even Nintendo.

With all the wrongs that Nintendo did with the Wii U, they’ve been able to make up for it big time with the Nintendo Switch, selling over 140 million consoles to this day and may soon pass the DS and PlayStation as the best selling gaming console of all time. Microsoft has not come anywhere close towards a redemption arc that Sony earned after the PlayStation 3 or Nintendo earned after the Wii U. It’s still a disaster to this day and may even forced them to pull a SEGA and drop out of the console war entirely. (I have a link for that at the very end of the article).

Every single fatal flaw that Microsoft has suffered through can all go back to that Xbox One game reveal on this day, 11 years ago. It annihilated gamers and consumers all around, it gave the worst possible first impression that one could have when revealing their latest software, it added more confusion and anger than excitement, and most importantly, it made everyone look at Microsoft in a complete different way in terms of gaming. And that feeling is still mutual to this very day!

It just goes to show you how a simple reveal of a company’s newest product can not just ruin your present but also your past and future as well. And sometimes, it can do it all at once. It all goes back to the Xbox One reveal on May 21st, 2013.

*in Jim Gordon’s voice* This is how it happened! This is how the Xbox died!

Related Microsoft Article

My Favorite Movies From Each Year I Was Born

So, yeah, it’s my birthday today! I officially turn 27 years old. To be honest, as I get older, my birthday is the day I really dread because it just reminds me how old I’ve becoming and just how little I’ve actually done with my life for my first 27 years in existence. However, to try to put myself in a happy spirit for this very day, I decided to do something fun and name my two favorite movies from each year that I was born. Starting in 1997 and ending in 2024. Why two movies from each year you may ask? Because I’m too cool enough where I can name two in a year as oppose to just one.

I just want to let you all know that this is strictly my opinion and these are the two movies from each respective year that have stuck with me all these years. They all may not be objectively the best movies ever made or ones that achieve the artistic level of perfection but these are just the movies that I look back on and remember fondly the most from every year since 1997. If you don’t like these choices, then I’m sorry. If you do, then awesome and I’m glad we share similar tastes. I’m also not gonna go in depth with each one because I rather just let the movies listed speak for themselves and expose my bizarre taste in films.

Anyways, here we go!

1997: Titanic & The Fifth Element

1998: Saving Private Ryan & Mulan

1999: The Matrix & Toy Story 2

2000: Unbreakable & Remember The Titans

2001: The Lord of the Rings- The Fellowship of the Ring & Memento

2002: The Lord of the Rings- The Two Towers & Spider-Man

2003: The Lord of the Rings- Return of the King & Finding Nemo

2004: Spider-Man 2/The Spongebob Squarepants Movie

2005: Batman Begins & Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith

2006: The Prestige & Casino Royale

2007: Zodiac & Ratatouille

2008: Kung Fu Panda & The Dark Knight

2009: Up & District 9

2010: Inception & Toy Story 3

2011: The Tree of Life & Kung Fu Panda 2

2012: The Avengers & The Dark Knight Rises

2013: The Wolf of Wall Street & Pacific Rim

2014: Whiplash & Guardians of the Galaxy

2015: Mad Max-Fury Road & Inside Out

2016: The Handmaiden & Arrival

2017: Get Out & Logan

2018: Annihilation & Spider-Man- Into the Spider-Verse

2019: Parasite & Avengers: Endgame

2020: Soul & Palm Springs

2021: The Mitchell vs The Machines & Spider-Man- No Way Home

2022: Everything Everywhere All At Once & Puss In Boots: The Last Wish

2023: Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse & Oppenheimer

2024: Dune: Part Two & Abigail

Ranking The Planet of the Apes Reboot

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is now out in theaters! While this is usually that time where everyone does their rankings of all ten Planet of the Apes movies, I’m gonna do something a little different.

Truth be told, I have not seen every single Planet of the Apes movie out there. Outside of this reboot, the only other entries in this franchise that I have seen is the original Planet of the Apes and the Tim Burton remake from 2001. That leaves about four other films in this series that I have yet to they.

So, instead of lying to you all and just place the four other apes flicks I haven’t see in whatever placement, why not just rank the four installments in the rebooted series? After all, these contain some of the most beloved films in this franchise’s stored history! Why not give them the complete spotlight on this occasion, especially in regards to the newest film in Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes?

If I’m able to watch the other Planet of the Apes films by the time that Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes hits digital and/or physical media, I might do a complete and full ranking of the entire franchise. But for now, just the reboot!

Let’s not waste anymore time and get straight down to ranking these acclaimed reboot!

4.) Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Don’t let the fact that the newest entry in this reboot is in last deceive you into thinking that it’s not worth your time and money! It’s in fact, worth both! Despite Rupert Wyatt and Matt Reeves no longer being behind the camera and Caesar no longer being the main ape protagonist we follow, Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is able to pick up the slack from it’s predecessors in the best way possible.

The new apes we focus on are as likable and compelling as the apes in the last three movies, the action is thoroughly entertaining and thrilling, the world building has never been more intriguing, and of course, the visuals and motion capture is completely off the charts. It may not be quite as impressive from an emotional and depth stand point as Dawn or War but just like with Rise, it’s able to stand strongly as it’s own engaging ape film while planting the seeds for what the future for the apes and remain human race can be if the story shall continue.

This is honestly a film I can see moving up on this list and even on my full ranking of the Planet of the Apes movies. The only real thing holding it back is the sense of familiarity with the storytelling along with the new ape of Noa not being as close to an engaging protagonist as Caesar. Even so, I’m fully on board for any potential sequel with these new characters and have fully confidence that Wes Ball is gonna deliver with the live-action Legend of Zelda movie.

3.) Rise of the Planet of the Apes

I don’t think anybody saw the awesomeness that is Rise of the Planet of the Apes coming. At a time where Hollywood was overblowing franchises with consecutives reboots and remakes along with coming off the rock bottom of the Apes franchise that was Tim Burton’s Planet of the Apes, this film had every reason to fail. Instead, it just about surprised everyone in every single way possible.

It introduces us to one of the finest film protagonists in recent memory with Caesar and a masterful Andy Serkis, that solidified himself as the king of motion capture performances. Seeing this beloved ape take his first step to becoming a special kind of ape raised by humans, meeting his fellow kind that would later become his friends, and planting the seeds of the future with a world dominated by apes is able to be as thrilling and engaging as one could possibly imagine. And you would be lying to yourself if you claim you didn’t get goosebumps at the moment that Caesar screamed “NOOOOOO!!!!”

Even if thin human characterization (outside of James Franco’s father) and some rushed story elements holds it back from being up there with it’s next two predecessors, Rise of the Planet of the Apes is about as good as a reboot and trilogy starter can possibly be. It just goes to show you that reboots and prequels can in fact be just as good if not better than the original films if the people behind it but the hard work and effort to do so.

2.) War for the Planet of the Apes

The final chapter to Caesar’s story included with this bleak but brilliant tale about the humans and apes going at it for one final showdown that will determine the fate of planet Earth. Despite what the title might suggest, War for the Planet of the Apes isn’t so much about a war that the humans and apes are fighting against each other but among themselves. This sees Caesar being a war within himself after witnessing those close to him being slaughter, crossing that fine line from being that gifted ape he was raised as by humans while also being the vicious ape that his kind was always suppose to be.

This part war/part revenge tale/part prison movie is able to bring the full three-movie long story arc to a satisfying conclusion with the ape characters we’ve been following since the first movie. Seeing Caesar being able to speak fully human and see his ape clan be as human as an ape can get is really intriguing to see, showcasing how far these characters have come. That’s not going into the tremendous motion capture work and visual effects, the hardcore action whenever it shows us, and Woody Harrelson’s The Colonel being the best and most menacing antagonist perhaps in this entire franchise.

While some might be underwhelmed that the film is not as “action heavy” that the title of the film might suggest, War for the Planet of the Apes is still able to tell an engaging and unconventional tale of it’s own that brings everything full circle in a very satisfying way. It’s able to close the final chapter of one book while getting you interested to read the next one.

1.) Dawn of the Planet of the Apes

If you want a textbook example of not only how great a Planet of the Ape movie can get but how great summer movie blockbuster can get, this would be exactly what you find in that dictionary. Released in a loaded 2014 movie season that was serving constant bangers from Memorial Day to August, Dawn of the Planet of the Apes was able to stand greatly among them along with the other great blockbusters of the 2010s.

This is a layered, three-dimensional, and at times unpredictable film that is able to tell a cautionary tale about the roles that two different species play and every single one of them looking for the best possible outcome for themselves. Instead of going with a conventional “apes good, human bad” approach, Dawn instead shows the pros and cons of both the humans and apes, highlighting the gray area that is consuming both sides, as the two sides are trying to make for the best possible future for themselves in the worst possible times. We also can’t forget the spectacular visuals and motion capture of the apes that has never been better than it has been here, great action, perfect tension throughout, and one of the coolest and underrated villains in recent memory in Koba, played perfectly by Toby Kebbell. Even the human drama works well this time (Although, I could have used more Gary Oldman and less of that one-note asshole) and helps make the scenes with the apes even better.

Perfectly paced, perfectly written, perfectly directed, and perfectly acted (Give Andy Serkis an Oscar already!), Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is not only the best in this rebooted series of films, it’s quite possibly the best Planet of the Apes film to date. Although I still have more ape films to see, I’m willing to bet they don’t come close to topping this absolute triumph of filmmaking. As much as we like to complain about the overabundance of reboots, remakes, sequels, prequels, etc.., I’m willing to bet that if the majority of them were even half as good as this film and all four of these films are in general, we would have very little to complain about. Dawn of the Planet of the Apes is blockbusters at it’s absolute finest, giving me all hope that we are still capable of making great franchise installments.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes (2024) Movie Review- Apes Remain Strong

It would be quite strange to consider the new rebooted run of Planet of the Apes as “underrated”. After all, every ape flick that has come out since 2011 has been received with high praise from critics and audiences alike. But yet, despite all the love these films tend to get at the time of its release, they usually tend to get swept under the rug shortly after release. I don’t know if it’s just because these are the kind of films that just come and go with no ill will geared towards them or it’s just that everyone agrees these movies are good and then proceed to move on with it their lives but that has mostly been the case with every recent release of the Planet of the Apes franchise. It’s not so much underrated but more overlooked. There’s a different between those two words.

I bring this up because when it comes to Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes, I think it’s about time we stop pushing these movies aside and just start accepting that the Planet of the Apes franchise is legit one of the best and most consistent film franchises out there. Despite Rupert Wyatt and Matt Reeves no longer being behind the camera and Caesar no longer being the main ape protagonist we follow, director Wes Ball is able to continue this rebooted series with grace with Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes in the best and most logical way possible.

The new apes we focus on are as likable and compelling as the apes in the last three movies, the action is thoroughly entertaining and thrilling throughout, the world building has never been more intriguing in these movies, and of course, the visuals and motion capture is completely off the charts and should be recognized greatly at the Academy Awards. It may not be quite as impressive from an emotional and depth stand point as Dawn or War or as the surprise/wow factor that Rise had but it’s able to stand strongly as it’s own engaging ape film while planting the seeds for what the future for the apes and humans can hold if the story shall continue.

Plot Synopsis: 300 years after the reign of Caesar, a young ape named Noa (Owen Teague) goes on a journey that will lead him to question everything he’s been taught about the past and make choices that will define a future for apes and humans alike.

The main strength that Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes has going for it is staying committed to its whole “back to basics” feel to it. It’s not interested in raising the stakes and topping the scales of Dawn or War, it’s not trying to reinvent the wheels like Rise, nor is it even trying to be the “real” ending to Caesar’s own trilogy. Despite this technically being the sequel to the last one, it has more interests in telling it’s own story and potentially blazing a path towards it’s own distinct future while acknowledging the impact that Caesar has had even 300 years later. Much like with Rise, there are plenty of hints of where to go from here if the series shall continue from here with the new characters we follow of Noa, Soona, Korina, Nova, and others. While the jury is still out whether or not this newest group can hold a candle to the likes of Caesar, Maurice, Koba, and others, the newest characters of Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes are compelling enough in their own right that their presence isn’t missed too much.

The main ape Noa in particular has an arc about carrying the right side to Caesar’s legacy while making sure to forge his own identity. Particular because it’s his actions throughout the film that can serve as a major turning point between the lives of the apes and human beings. Whether you see that as a metaphor of Kingdom being yet another legacyquel about newer fresh blood being passed the baton or just the main theme of evolution that has always been a staple for this series, it does work wonder and makes Noa all the more compelling to follow on screen.

Which could not make the antagonist as Proximus Caesar any better. Not only because he can be seen as another subtle metaphor of learning the “wrong” lessons from his ancestor and the overall lack of media literacy nowadays but also is a good contrast to Noa’s arc about being careful of his actions since it could potentially turn the tide between human and apes. I don’t know if Proximus is on the same level as Koba but he works perfectly as the antagonist of this movie, acting as a brilliant mirror to Noa and the legacy that Caesar himself has left beyond many generations later.

The performances remain as stellar as they usually are with these films! Owen Teague is able to fit in the big shoes he’s require to fill quite well as Noa, even if he can’t quite escape the shadow from Andy Serkis’s groundbreaking work in these films. Kevin Durand is able to make just as strong of impression as Proximus Caesar, going two for two this year, following Abigail. Peter Macon is able to add an extra bit of heart to the picture with Raka. It’s nice to have more female presence among the apes with Lydia Peckham’s Soona and Dichen Lachman’s Korina. And even if I’m not completely in love with everything done with Noa/May, Freya Allan fits the role very well and is quite believable in the action.

Speaking of action, they are just as well done and choregraphed as it usually is with these movies. Being able to get full advance out of the motion capture and move sets of the apes, the set pieces are completely thrilling throughout, with the final third delivering exactly on that action that is set up with the first two thirds of the film. The visuals are just as top notch as the previous movies, with plenty of beautiful cinematography and location shooting that helps enthralled the world building throughout the movie. The score is quite strong with not a single track feeling out of place. And it even has more of a sense of levity than the prior three films did, adding a bit of light of what might be considered a more calm tone than before.

If there is one major thing that holds Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes back from reaching the standards of it’s predecessors, it’s that sense of familiarity in terms of the characters and themes. It’s understandable in the sense that it has to update the status quo in this world but four movies in, you are able to recognize the bits throughout. From the new heads of the cast to the new prisoners set to the characters from both sides yet again questioning their place in this worlds, it makes the hitting beats from the previous films more noticeable than before. I’m not gonna say it’s a rehash of the last three films since it has enough of an identity of it’s own but it could have afford to step out of the shadow a little bet and tread less familiar ground.

I also would have like to see more of the human’s point of view with the limited human characters we have throughout, particularly Noa. Not that I needed a good chunk of a movie to centered around them but just enough time where it makes the actions that Noa makes in the last third of the movie feel more justified. Also, more of William H. Macy would have been nice as well.

Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes is able to carry the momentum of this rebooted Apes movies by both paying great tribute to the Caesar trilogy while also expanding the world dominated by apes in fascinating ways. Time will tell if this film and the inevitable follow-ups will live up to the high standards of Rise, Dawn, and War but for what it’s worth, it’s good and compelling enough in it’s own right that it’s worth seeing where this franchise can go for here. Four movies into this reboots and apes continue to remain strong! Caesar would indeed be proud!

Other comments:

  • I have more faith in the live-action Legend of Zelda movie now but I still don’t get why that needs to be live-action, especially after the ANIMATED Super Mario Bros movie made a billion dollars last year. At least, it will look nice with great landscape shots!

  • The only real Elon Musk comparison I see with Proximus Caesar is the fact that he’s played by Kevin Durand, who legit looks like Elon Musk’s twin brother except he’s actually a good hearted person.

  • I honestly thought Raka was a 320 year old Maurice once we first saw him.

  • Also, please for the love of god, bring that character back that was supposedly killed off. I don’t care how or why, just bring them back because they are too precious and likable and shouldn’t be wasted like that. It may for a nice emotional moment in the film but please bring them back!

Top 10 Best Star Wars Games

May the 4th be with you, everybody! There is nothing like annual Star Wars day, a day that celebrates the most iconic sci-fi franchise out there! Instead of putting my entire reputation in jeopardy by ranking the Star Wars movies, how about I put my reputation in jeopardy by ranking my top 10 favorite Star Wars games?

There has been a TON of Star Wars games released over the years! Everyone has their own personal favorite as does yours truly! And to celebrate May 4th, I’m gonna share my list of my top 10 personal favorite Star Wars games!

I will say that I have not played EVERY single Star Wars game out there! There might be some of your favorites that will not be on the list because I either have not played it or I just didn’t care much for it. That should be acknowledged right out of the gate!

Let’s get onto list making by starting with my honorable mentions:

Honorable Mentions:

  • Star Wars: Rogue Squadron

An arcade style flight action game that lets you control as Luke Skywalker in his X-Wing and lead the Rogue Squadron to defeating the empire. It’s always fun to take control over ships in a Star Wars game and be able to blast your way through enemies. There’s not much content outside of the 16 story missions but it was definitely enjoyable. I sure hope that Rogue Squadron movie that Patty Jenkins had in mind will eventually see the light of day.

  • Star Wars: The Force Unleashed

One of the most controversial games in the series is one that I admittedly have fondness for. The idea of taking control of a force user that has unlimited power that wasn’t seen in any of the main Star Wars movies is a rather unique one for a Star Wars game. I did enjoy taking control of Starkiller and seeing him evolve over the course of the game. If it were less buggy and glitchy, this might have made it on the list. Also, Sam Witwer is the G.O.A.T.!

  • Star Wars: Jedi Alliance

The one game connected to The Clone War series that I enjoyed the most. Lightsaber Duels was too repetitive and wore out it’s welcome fast, Republic Heroes had INCREDIBLEY frustrating platforming and mindless combat, and Clone Wars Adventures had WAY too much locked content for a full experience. However, the Nintendo DS experience with Jedi Alliance was an enjoyable experience that took the best use of the portable device along with an intriguing story that dug deep into the lore of the Nightsisters. I might be one of the few on the planet that remembers this game but I have no shame in it whatsoever.

  • Star Wars: Elite Squadron

The Battlefront entry made exclusively for the PSP was one that felt completely made for the PSP. It was able to incorporate most of the things that made the previous Battlefront games so good while also putting it’s own spin on it to make it work for the PSP. Sure, the overall story might be silly with putting the focus on two “special” clone troopers who just so happens to be a part of EVERY turning point in the franchise but come on, you know it’s every Star Wars fan’s dream to be a hero in a galaxy far, far, away.

  • Star Wars: Battlefront II (2017)

At launch, Battlefront II was another disappointment from E.A., doubling down on everything people hated about them as a company along with shoving loot boxes and microtransactions down everyone’s throat. However, as the years went on and more content from all corners of the galaxy got added in, this is now a much fonder game to look back on. Had this been the game we got back in 2017, this could have made the list. Even so, this still has to be one of the better redemption stories in recent gaming history.

Now onto the main top 10!

10.) Star Wars Trilogy Arcade

Was there anyone out there that remembers playing the hell out of this game when they went to Chuck E. Cheese? I sure do! The Star Wars Trilogy Arcade game includes the three biggest battles from the original Star Wars trilogy: The Battle of Yavin 4, The Battle of Hoth, and The Battle for Endor! It puts you in the hands of the heroes from the first three films that needs to defeat the Galactic Empire and save the day! It’s an incredibly short but sweet experience that I would also go back to whenever I was at Chuck E. Cheese. If only they can re-release this on modern consoles!

9.) Star Wars: Battlefront (2004)

The original Star Wars: Battlefront was definitely a groundbreaking game for it’s time, setting the groundwork for this series that it’s follow-up would build greatly upon. The major downside is that it came out before Revenge of the Sith that makes the campaign disjointed and rather incomplete, introducing battles through the first fives movies and not the six yet. Even so, it’s still fun to roam and fight you way through the Clone Wars and Galactic Civil War, with everything that works here becoming even better in later games. Even if it is certainly date, there’s still plenty of variety and replay value that Star Wars: Battlefront provides.

8.) Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic II- The Sith Lords

Knights of the Old Republic: The Sith Lords II was able to expand upon the gameplay and lore that the original provided with equally satisfying results. The main cast of characters are among the most compelling in any form of Star Wars media and the story it tells is easily one of the best in any Star Wars video games. The only downside is how rushed the ending segments are and the most accessible version of the game is lacking the Restored Content as DLC. Aside from those two flaws, this is still a very good game that offers the strong gameplay and storytelling that the original Knights of the Old Republic offered in ways that no other Star Wars media has.

7.) Star Wars Republic Commando

If you were to describe the Star Wars game that was the absolute definitive FPS experience, look no further than Republic Commando. This single-player, first-person shooter is among the most enjoyable Star Wars gaming experience to date. You get put in the hands of the Delta Squad of Clone Troopers in the form of Boss, Fixer, Scorch, and Sev, getting a deep look into the Clone Wars itself. And before The Clone Wars series, this was the first Star Wars property to provide unique characterization to the clone troopers and treat them as actual people rather than mindless drones. This is one that can cater to not just Star Wars fans but also fans of a good FPS! If you still have yet to play it, there’s a ported version of it that you can pick up on the PlayStation 4 and Xbox One.

6.) Star Wars: Jedi Fallen Order

After a skew of underwhelming Star Wars games in the hands of EA, Jedi Fallen Order was a pleasant surprise when it released back in 2019. This remaining one of the very best single-player Star Wars games, putting you in the hands of Jedi Knight Cal Kestis, who is forced to fight his way through Order 66 and the rise of the Empire. It also offers an incredibly compelling story with a cast of characters that are one of the best Star Wars groups ever (BD-1 is just everything!). While the gameplay might borrow too many elements from Soulsborne, it fits the experience completely as you hack and slash your way as a Jedi Knight with awesome force powers. Also, anytime Darth Vader goes into complete OP mode is just awesome!

5.) Star Wars: The Old Republic

BioWare’s second Star Wars game remains an absolute fan favorite for many and for good reason. The Old Republic is a highly ambitious MMO that expands upon that same ear greatly. There’s plenty of content that the game provides with many different ways for you to spend your hours during perhaps the most intriguing time period in the history of Star Wars. Some of the quests are quite standard and it does follow the same beats as most MMOs but with a Star Wars license on top it but this is still as good as this kind of Star Wars game can get. While it’s a shame we never got a third Knights of the Old Republic game, The Old Republic is more than satisfying enough on it’s own merits that it completely makes up for it.

4.) Star Wars: Jedi Survivor

Jedi Survivor was able to build upon it’s already impressive predecessor in just about every way it possibly could. It furthered the characters, it expanded upon the gameplay and universe, it moved at a faster frame rate, it took a step forward in terms of graphics, and it contained some of the best set pieces in any Star Wars video game! While it wasn’t as tight narratively as the first one and the worlds were a bit too big for some, Jedi Survivor was able to deliver more in terms of it’s gameplay, graphics, and presentation. It was one of my favorite games last year and I can not wait for the third entry of this series. If that delivers, then this series will stand strongly as top tier Star Wars media out there.

3.) Lego Star Wars Series

It’s near impossible for me to choose just one or two of these games so I decided to just include the whole series in general, except for Lego Star Wars: The Force Awakens because I never played that one. Lego Star Wars will always have a special place in my heart. I played these games before I watched any of the Star Wars movies and man, was it just a fun, entertaining, and absolutely HILARIOUS way for me to get into this series. The gameplay involving the legos is unique, creative, and very enjoyable, it’s able to retell the events of the films and The Clone Wars series in ways that are both clever and super funny, and there is so much extras, unlockable content, and variety throughout that it will have you playing through these games for HOURS to DAYS on end! Regardless if you are a Star Wars fan or not, these are games I can recommend for just about anybody of any age.

2.) Star Wars: Knights of the Old Republic

No matter what way you look at, the original Knights of the Old Republic is an absolute triumph in terms of visuals, storytelling, and gameplay for both Star Wars and the RPG genre as a whole. It takes an extraordinary look at the Star Wars universe, far removed from any film in the Skywalker Saga. It added major depth to the lore, it fully immerse you in exploring this new corner of the galaxy with rich new additions, and being a Jedi has never been more satisfying in any Star Wars video game. That’s also not to mention the memorable locations and quests, intriguing story, and memorable characters to make the whole game feel as full as you could imagine! This might be the best Star Wars game from an objective standpoint but from a subjective standpoint, there’s one more that fully perfects by Star Wars gaming experience.

1.) Star Wars: Battlefront 2 (2005)

Star Wars: Battlefront 2 is the perfect Star Wars game! Not only does it build upon everything that the original Battlefront offered a year before and gives you even more but it is the one Star Wars game I can think of that is satisfying no matter who or what you are playing as. No matter if you are playing as a clone trooper, battle droid, rebel trooper, storm trooper, bounty hunter, smuggler, Jedi, or Sith, it is extremely satisfying to play. It offers the best areas of all six Star Wars movies up to that point, it includes most fan favorites characters to the roster such as Luke Skywalker, Obi-Wan Kenobi, Darth Vader, Princess Leia, Boba Fett, Darth Maul, and so many more, the area and space battles are always intense and fun, the campaign is very compelling, and this has hands down the best multiplayer of any Star Wars game. It’s just a damn shame that the new remastered version is as bad as it is because with the perfect remastered, this could be seen as one of the best shooting games ever made. With the addition of online multiplayer and co-op along with some added bonus features, this could be even better. Even so, the original Star Wars: Battlefront 2 still remains a S-tier Star Wars experience and my personal favorite Star Wars game to date!

Hope you all enjoy this list and may the 4th be with you!

Top 10 Biggest Summer Movies- Box Office Predictions

It’s now officially May which means it’s now officially summer movie season! The time of the year where the big blockbusters of the year are front and center in movie theaters everywhere now that the kids are out of school! Because of that, I figure I’d so something that I’ve yet to do on this blog, do a list of what I believe will be the top highest grossing films of the summer!

2023 was an absolute DISASTER at the box office during the summer time! That is largely due to the massive budgets from the majority of the big movies that came out that year along with just the overall inconsistent-to-poor quality of those big movies. And considering the fact there will likely be no Barbenheimer to save the summer, 2024 will likely be just as challenging for summer movies!

Even so, I think the 2024 summer movie season will give a big indication as to whether or not Hollywood is still recovering from the post-covid era of struggling to get people’s butts into theater seats or will this be the beginning of a resurrection for summer movies! We can only cross our fingers and hope for the best!

And considering I’ve been seeing multiple people put their own predictions of the top 10 biggest summer movies in terms of profit, why not throw my own hat in the ring and do my own list of this?! Keep in mind, these are the movies that I believe will be the highest grossing of the summer, not the ones that I desperately want to be at the very top. If that were the case, then Furiosa would at least be in the top 3 and Despicable Me 4 would be dead last on this list. This is list is not a matter of anticipating or movies I think will be objective the best, this is a list of the movies that I believe will be the most to least successful in terms of the top 10 movies of the summer.

Also, this is a ranking based on box office numbers worldwide and NOT domestic. That list would be harder and more complicated for me to judge. This is how I feel the box office numbers will hold for each film WORLDWIDE. Could I be dead wrong on every single one of these? Absolutely! But hey, it’s fun to be able to make predictions, right?!

Time to jump right in and put my predictions on what I believe will be the top 10 highest grossing films of the summer!

10.) Furiosa

Release Date: May 24th

Box Office Projection: $350 Million

Reason: I have all the faith in the world that George Miller will deliver with this film but I’m just not sure it’s one that most general audience will be interested in. Despite the massive praise that Mad Max: Fury Road got back in 2015, it only made a little over 380 million dollars worldwide, with a net loss somewhere between $20-$40 million. And considering this is basically a prequel spin-off surrounding a character from Fury Road but played by a completely different actress and with no Mad Max to be found in the marketing, that doesn’t inspire much confidence for Furiosa to top or even match that. I love to be proven wrong and the cult following of Fury Road will show up to this one but I wouldn’t be surprised if this ends up being the most frustrating Hollywood flop since last year Mission Impossible: Dead Reckoning, especially with the rumored film budget being over 200 million dollars! Hopefully this prevails and we get more Mad Max films from George Miller with the time we still have with him!

9.) Bad Boys Ride or Die

Release Date: June 7th

Box Office Projection: $400 Million

Reason: This is likely the summer movie I’m the most curious to see how it performs. This is a sequel to a movie that was one of the last solid hits to come out before covid hit. If it’s able to hit all the right beats just like Bad Boys For Life did, then I can see this doing similar numbers to that and perhaps even top it. The only big question is whether or not everyone has forgiven Will Smith for slapping Chris Rock on stage yet?

8.) The Fall Guy

Release Date: May 3rd

Box Office Projection: $425 Million

Reason: The first big movie of the summer is set to arrive tomorrow and I think this will largely benefit from being that first big movie of the summer. It also helps that it’s an awfully good over-the-top action flick that puts the spotlight on stunt doubles. If the word of mouth is good enough this weekend, I can definitely see this being a genuine crowd pleaser and may even make more folks demand that the Academy act a stunt category to the Oscars. I seem to be higher on this movie than most folks that I’ve seen but I think The Fall Guy will do more than fine and dandy at the box office.

7.) A Quiet Place: Day One

Release Date: June 28th

Box Office Projection: 450 Million

Reason: Coming after the first two terrific installments, this is the one main horror franchise that has left the audience more intrigued to see what happens next. The only potential downside is that this acts as a prequel to those first two films with a completely different cast and director. The big looming questions is whether or not audiences love A Quiet Place for it’s memorable characters and recognizable actors or for it’s genuine scares, set pieces, and world building. If the quality for Day One is in the same ballpark as those first two Quiet Place movies, then I can certainly see it being in the same ballpark as the first two films in terms of box office results.

6.) If

Release Date: May 17th

Box Office Projection: $475 Million

Reason: There are two main factors here that will make If a good hit at the box office. First, it will be the biggest family friendly movie to come out in May (give or take The Garfield Movie) and will have enough time to stand out as that until Inside Out 2 and Despicable Me 4 come out. Secondly, it has the star power duo of Ryan Reynolds and John Krasinski. Those two factors alone are almost certain guarantee that this movie will do bank once it comes out in the next two weeks. It likely won’t be the biggest movie of the summer starring Mr. Blake Lively but it will definitely help for him to have a summer to remember.

5.) Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes

Release Date: May 10th

Box Office Projection: $500 Million

Reason: The next big summer entry is set to come out in theaters next month and looks as if it will be as visually delighting and narratively compelling as it’s rebooted predecessors. Disney has been doing everything in their power to promote this film by showing off the elements that folks loved the most about the previous three films. That in of itself will guarantee a strong first weekend, especially since it’s avoiding Memorial Day competition with Furiosa and The Garfield Movie. Just like with A Quiet Place: Day One, the biggest challenge that Kingdom of the Planet of the Apes will have to overcome is make people just as invested in this new cast and crew as they were with the previous ones. If it does that, then this will likely be in the top 5 movies of the summer.

4.) Twisters

Release Date: July 19th

Box Office Projection: $600 Million

Reason: It might be a bold claim on the surface to predict this one making 600 million and being one of the biggest movies of the summer but hear me out. The original Twisters is adored by many, it has the star power of Glen Powell, coming off his great work in Top Gun: Maverick, and everyone just loves a good disaster flick. The trailers have been doing it’s best to sell audiences on exactly what they want to see out of a disaster movie and that alone will likely get plenty of folks into the theaters. I could be dead wrong in claiming this but even if this does get bad reviews, I don’t see that scaring away audiences because this is the definition of a “critic proof” movie. By that note, this will likely be the most successful “critic proof” movie since The Super Mario Bros Movie. Hopefully, the discourse over the Rotten Tomato score won’t be as insufferable.

3.) Inside Out 2

Release Date: June 14th

Box Office Projection: $750 Million

Reason: Disney has been in quite a slump as of late with their theatrically released films, especially in terms of animation. Despite all the flops released last year, Elemental had some staying power and made just enough to be guaranteed a profit, making that and Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 the only Disney movies to NOT be considered a financial disappointment. And considering this is a sequel to one of the most beloved Pixar films in recent memory, Inside Out 2 will be able to do some of the best numbers with Disney Animation since 2019, especially if the reviews are stellar. The recent track record alone might prevent it from reaching the same success as the first one but if it delivers, Inside Out 2 should be able to be the most successful theatrically released Pixar film since Toy Story 4 and possibly even the most successful theatrically released Disney film overall since Frozen 2.

2.) Deadpool & Wolverine

Release Date: July 26th

Box Office Projection: $900 Million

Reason: Many folks have claimed this will be a guarantee billion dollar hit but I think everyone needs to come back to reality for a moment. After many big movies underperformed last year, including two MCU installments, we might need to pump the breaks on such bold claims. As much as Deadpool & Wolverine is one of the most anticipated movies of the year and will likely be one of the biggest movies of the summer, that’s won’t guarantee 7 digits as prior big Marvel movies did. The R-rating alone (A reminder that there has been only ONE film to ever make a billion dollars!) along with the inconsistent quality of recent Marvel movies/shows will likely prevent it from reaching that billion dollar mark, with audiences still needing more consistent quality Marvel flicks to be fully won back. The promise of seeing Huge Jackman as Wolverine once again in yellow spandex, the buddy-cop routine with him and Ryan Reynolds’ Deadpool, and the absolute guarantee of multiple easter eggs, cameos, and fan service will make Deadpool & Wolverine one of the biggest movies of the summer almost certainly. When it comes to if it will be the first Marvel movie since Spider-Man: No Way Home to make a billion dollars, that more than remains to be seen in my eyes.

1.) Despicable Me 4

Release Date: July 3rd

Box Office Projection: $1.1 Billion

Reason: I don’t understand the appeal of these movies and I likely never will but one thing is certain though, this franchise certainly has an audience. Coming off a third entry that made a billion dollars and a second Minions movie that almost made a billion dollars, there is no reason to believe that Despicable Me 4 won’t be in that exact same territory in terms of box office success. Whether you like or hate them, Illumination Animation certainly knows how to get kids and families to theaters with their films and this will certainly be no exception. As I said before, the quality of any of these films is irrelevant and I highly doubt any kind of negative reviews will impact the box office results here. If I had to pick one big movie that is the saftest bet to make a billion dollars and be the highest grossing movie of the summer, it would be Despicable Me 4. I wish that was not the case but hey, there are plenty of folks out there that do. So, what do I now?

Other notes:

As for the other movies that got let off the list!

  • The Garfield Movie nearly came close to topping Furiosa the 10th spot but unless it’s able to make noise at Memorial Day, I can see this being shipped to digital really quickly. It might do enough for a profit but not Hotel Transylvania and Spider-Verse numbers.

  • Alien: Romulus looks like a return to traditional roots for the series in the form of Prey but it will likely have to pay for the sins of Prometheus and Alien: Covenant (Damn you, Ridley Scott!).

  • The Bikeriders seems fun but won’t leave much impact until it hits streaming service like it originally was suppose to.

  • Horizon: An American Saga could likely come and go depending on it’s quality.

  • And if the trailers for Borderlands is anything to go by, this will likely be one of the biggest bombs of the summer. Why, Eli Roth?! Just why?!

SpongeBob SquarePants (Seasons 6-8) Retrospective: The “Bad” Era

Oh boy, what in the world did I get myself into?

Yeah, you all knew this was coming!

This was when SpongeBob SquarePants got truly as bad as folks claimed the show got after the first movie. While I still stand by my opinion that Seasons 4 and 5 weren’t the worst things in the world, these next three seasons I’m about to talk about is MORE than deserving a seat at the table. Okay, maybe that’s a little harsh. It’s not the worst thing ever but it’s undoubtedly SpongeBob’s roughest time throughout his history up to this point.

There are multiple different factors that played into the poor quality of these three seasons I’m about to talk about. Part of it is because most of the writers from the original three seasons were no longer present. Another part of it is because the writers of these three seasons likely tried to add their own style of humor and slapstick to the show that just fell flat. And of course, there’s that part that might be how the show has gone on for way too long and basically ran out of ideas. However, I do think the one main factor in all of this has to do with Nickelodeon and them relying SpongeBob SquarePants WAY too much to keep their network afloat!

Nickelodeon has been a controversial network for quite some time, ESPECIALLY in recent events (Dan Schneider is going straight to hell!). A big part of that has to do with their habit of expecting a new show to be a big grand hit RIGHT out of the gate and never looking back. When a new show doesn’t meet anything near those criteria, they tend to disregard it quite quickly.

So much so that they won’t even have the decency to air the rest of the episodes of a season but just dump it on their “back-up” network and letting that show go out with an absolute whimper. Or in the case of The Legend of Korra, they’ll just stop airing new episodes halfway through a season on TV and dump the rest of the show on their website. Yes, that really happened!

However, when a show does in fact become as big of a hit as they want, they go too far in the other direction and milk it until that cow is dry. And even then, they’ll just find another cow to milk.

There has been two shows throughout their history that has been the direct result of that: The Fairly Oddparents and SpongeBob SquarePants. With Nickelodeon constantly cranking out new episodes and content for these long lasting franchises like crazy, it played a significant role in their inevitable decline in quality.

It was by the points of Seasons 6, 7, and 8 that Nick was relying HEAVILY on the SpongeBob brand to keep the network at a steady heart rate. They would constantly demand for new episodes to be made as fast as humanly possible. Don’t worry about the overall quality. All that matters is that they get a ton of episodes released so they can be covered for the next two to three years before having to worry about anything beyond that timeline.

When watching Seasons 6 through 8, you can definitely tell that Nick was rushing production for new episodes of SpongeBob that the writers never had time to sit down and figure out what the hell they were even doing. It was that bad!

The end results of that leads to an era of very ill-fated and mean spirited episodes that goes against everything that the show has been up to this point. You have characters acting constantly out of characters, the same repetitive “torture porn” jokes, inconsistent animation with unintentional creepy imagery, messed up morals that aren’t well thought out in the slightest, and episodes that lack any sort of substance whatsoever. If there was ever a time where the post-movie haters got to gloat how right they were with SpongeBob losing his way after the first three seasons, this was it.

Let’s dive a little deeper as to why this era of SpongeBob SquarePants has been the show’s most infamous.

Seasons 6 & 7

You might be wondering why I’m going to be talking about Seasons 6 and 7 at the same time? Well, that’s because they both have the exact same kind of problems that I just mentioned. So much so that it’s pretty hard to tell which season that each episode belongs to. Not only because Nickelodeon aired episodes in between both seasons before either one was officially complete (This would not be the only time they would do that in this show before and after!) but because the majority of the episodes gave that exact sense of ill-conceived, poorly thought out gags and storytelling.

First off, you have the infamous episodes that lacked any sort of substance. These were mainly ones that take the most paper-thin premise imaginable and filled 90% of the runtime with filler. You have Penny Foolish which is about Mr. Krabs trying so hard to get just a little penny from SpongeBob. You have The Card which is about SpongeBob trying to protect a special Mermaid Man and Barnacle Boy card from Patrick. You have A Day Without Tears which SpongeBob makes a bet with Squidward that can he go a whole day without crying. There’s also Gone, which is about everyone but SpongeBob disappearing from Bikini Bottom, only to find out they left because it was National No SpongeBob Day! They are about as dull, one-note, and shallow as the premise of each episode makes it out to be.

You have the infamous episodes that show of the lackluster animation and gross out images. There’s The Splinter that shows the most disgusting looking splinter that you will likely ever see on your life. There’s House Fancy that shows Squidward’s entire toenail coming off in rather painful fashion. There’s Keep Bikini Bottom Beautiful where we see Squidward eating, bathing, and sleeping in complete garbage. While the earlier SpongeBob seasons weren’t necessarily a stranger to gross out humor, these seasons take it way too far to the point where these episodes might make you legit nauseous.

You have the infamous episodes that completely butchers the characters beyond repair. You have Boating Buddies, Choir Boys, and Squid’s Visit which makes SpongeBob come across as a complete stalker with the way he refuses to let Squidward have his space and knows his home and lifestyle near perfectly. You have A Pal for Gary that makes SpongeBob look like an arrogant and illogical jerk to Gary, who is literally getting TORMENTED by the other pet in this house. You have Yours Mine and Mine and Stuck in the Wringer which takes Patrick’s stupidity to ridiculous level and making him look like a selfish a-hole. There’s even One Course Meal, which makes Mr. Krabs look like the most soulless crab in the ocean by trying to drive Plankton into committing suicide (an episode which even Clancy Brown admitted he was very uncomfortable doing voice work for). These episodes were so bad that I wouldn’t blame anyone if it made fans not look at certain characters the same way again.

You also have the infamous special episodes, especially one in particular, that were so overhyped and underwhelming that it made people lose interest in the show completely. While SpongeBob vs The Big One was pretty good, just about every other one in Seasons 6 and 7 were about as lackluster as the majority of special SpongeBob episodes. The Clash of Triton was mediocre at best that made you want to sympathize with King Neptune’s whiny and annoying son but failed spectacularly. SpongeBob’s Last Stand was a bold attempt on making commentary on environmental awareness that mostly fell flat and was ultimately forgettable. And do I even need to mention the dull, obnoxious, poorly directed, visually ugly, non-existential story driven, and disappointing as hell special that was Truth or Square. The 10th anniversary special that was nothing but false advertising and empty promises, the worst possible celebration for ten years of SpongeBob SquarePants that you could imagine. That one special alone was so bad that it made plenty of folks drop the show completely, such as yours truly.

That’s not to say there were ZERO good episodes of any kind to be found in Seasons 6 and 7 such as Sand Castles in the Sand and The Bad Guy Club for Villains. It’s just that you would have to dig HARD to find those hidden gems buried within such garbage. Anything else you would find is nothing but trashy, greasy nonsense. A sign that Nickelodeon no longer valued the quality of SpongeBob SquarePants but more saw it for it’s name and brand alone. There’s plenty of fingers to be pointed around here but this was the show at it’s absolute lowest point.

However, why didn’t I lump Season 8 into this as well?! Well, it’s complicated!

Season 8

To be clear, Season 8 was also not a good overall season whatsoever. There were plenty of episodes of the dire examples that I just mentioned to be found here. You have Face Freeze! which showed off the creepiest and most horrifying face expressions that has ever been seen on this show. You have Pet Sitter Pat which made Patrick more unlikable and insufferable than he always has been, allowing poor Gary to be beaten up the whole way through. And it’s better not mentioning Demolition Doofus, the episode where Mrs. Puffs is trying to get SpongeBob literally MURDERED! This was a bad season by all accounts, but it did have it’s moments!

As much as there were plenty of bad things about Season 8, it also had a handful of good things about it. The good things that not only help make it more salvageable compared to Seasons 6 and 7 but also it helped plant the seeds for the inevitable resurrection seasons for the coming years. These were good episodes that helped made Season 8 not just the best out of a bad bunch but also the best possible conclusion to the worst era of SpongeBob’s history.

A handful of fan favorite episodes this season include the likes of Frozen Face Off, Planet of the Jellyfish, Super Villain Aquatic Villain Team Up Is Go!, Chum Fricassee, the Vacation episodes, and The Krabby Patty That Ate Bikini Bottom. However, there were two special episodes that I believed helped evaluate this seasons quite a bit. Those two special episodes were It’s A SpongeBob Christmas! and the Season 8 finale, Hello Bikini Bottom!

While the Vacation episodes with the main characters going on vacations were light and enjoyable enough on their own merits (even if most of them probably could have just been shorts instead of 11 to 22-minute long episodes), these two special episodes were able to capture a certain spark that the majority of this era couldn’t come close to achieving. It showed that not only is it possible for there to be new SpongeBob episodes that were good but that this show did in fact have some creative energy left within itself.

It’s A SpongeBob Christmas! was the first major SpongeBob episode to be strictly in stop motion animation. It also officially premiered on CBS during November 2012 before airing on Nickelodeon a month later. And believe it or not, it was very, very good. It managed to be funny, charming, moving, and just put you right into the Christmas spirit! For as good as the original Christmas Who? special was, It’s A SpongeBob Christmas managed to be just as good if not better than that already classic Christmas animated tale.

I would also go into deep details into how important Hello, Bikini Bottom! was to this season and the whole show in general but I actually have a special piece of that coming next month. And yes, that will be the monthly piece for this yearly SpongeBob retrospective! There’s just so much to talk about that episode and the multiple meanings that it has. Needless to say, it’s a very special episode and one that I feel should be even more appreciated than it already is.

Overall, I guess you can look at Season 8 compared to Seasons 6 and 7 the same way that folks look at Revenge of the Sith compared to the rest of the Star Wars prequel trilogy. It may not be particularly good but it’s definitely the least bad of the three with some redeemable values to it. However, the redeemable values are definitely worth bringing up as it would eventually build up towards another golden era of the yellow sponge quite later on in the future. This is something that I will be tackling in my next piece of the yearly SpongeBob marathon with talking about why Hello, Bikini Bottom! might be the most important episode of SpongeBob SquarePants.

In Conclusion

I’m not sure what more I can say that hasn’t been said about everyone else on the planet to how bad this era of SpongeBob SquarePants truly was. It’s the era which saw SpongeBob at his absolute lowest point. Due to Nickelodeon’s constant micro management and time constraints along with writers that might have been over their heads, Seasons 6-8, even with the last season’s good elements to it, is what sank SpongeBob’s reputation so hard. It was so bad that it killed any good will that most folks had left in this series. It did so much damage to SpongeBob that it made folks not want to acknowledge the legit good episodes that are a part of it because of how bad the majority of the episodes were. Whenever I feel the urge to claim that post-movie SpongeBob was no where near as bad as many have led you to believe, it’s these three seasons that respond back with an enthusiastic, “Yes, it is!”. And it’s then I would lose this fight completely.

I feel sad that the episode I will be talking about next month had to be a part of this era. In some ways, it basically had to die for this era’s sins to push towards the brighter next era that would come along. And it’s that episode of Hello, Bikini Bottom! that I will be covering in May!

Next Month: Why Hello, Bikini Bottom Is The Most Important Episode of SpongeBob SquarePants