We are now 10 days away from the release of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3. It’s no understatement to say that this is a movie that Marvel has a lot riding on. Not only does it have to follow-up Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania which, if the critical reviews and underwhelming box office results are any indication, was the straw the broke the camel’s back for many regarding the MCU, but it has to rewrite the narrative of superhero fatigue being a real thing and that audiences just wants better movies involving this subgenre of movies. Even though the early box office projections don’t look promising, Disney and Marvel Studios are allowing for early fan screenings for the movie that will air at selective theaters all across the U.S.A. for this upcoming Friday. I imagine this is in the mindset that Disney and Marvel believe that have a winner on their hand for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 and hope that strong early word of mouth will have the movie outperform it’s early expectations.
Now, we already know that Guardians 3 was gonna be a big deal for Marvel regardless of the current state of the MCU. After all, this is set to be the final film regarding the property that at one point in time was considering the underdog for the MCU. Back in 2014, almost no one other than hardcore comic book fans had any expectations for the Guardians of the Galaxy themselves and it only has ended up being one of the most popular and loved Marvel franchises out there. With most of the original Avenger roster gone and only Spider-Man remaining as that one sole piece of the previous Infinity Saga puzzle, having this movie be a win is an absolute must. However, it’s not just Marvel that has much depending on Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3, it’s also DC Comics as well.
The most obvious reason is the fact that Guardians of the Galaxy director James Gunn (alongside Peter Safran) will be leading the next DC renaissance going forward after the release of his final work with Marvel Studios. After all, you want to get the higher ups at Warner Bros a great first impression that the next run with the likes of Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, etc.. will be in good hands by following it up with a comic book movie that’s a strong hit critically and financially. While that is undeniably important, there’s something much bigger at stake for the DC Universe if Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is not a hit. That the new DC Universe is finished before it even begins.
While Quantumania certainly performed way below expectations in the box office was a clear sign of fatigue, you could also make the same argument for the previous two DC movies with Black Adam and Shazam!: Fury of the Gods as well. While there are certain folks out there that champion Black Adam, it’s been considered a box-office bomb due to only grossing $393 million with a $190 to a $260 million budget. Whether that has to due with The Rock’s own ego of refusing to work with Shazam! or not is beyond me but no doubt that was not encouraging. And if you were to tell me a movie in recent memory that came and went to theaters at the snap of Thanos’s finger, that would be Shazam!: Fury of the Gods, a movie that literally made it’s way to digital just three weeks after it released in theaters and is no longer playing in cinema despite it coming out a little over a month ago. If that’s not a sign of a studio letting a movie die, then I don’t know what is.
There might be an argument or two that the reason those movies tanked had to do with the fact that the mainstream audience is over the current DC universe and is now waiting for the next one to come around to support that one. But that’s the thing, what if that is not the case? What if those movies bomb because the mainstream audience is just feed up with DC and superhero movies in general? What if Superman: Legacy comes around in summer 2025 and it ends up performing below expectations as well? Even if Warner Bros were looking to move on from their current cinematic universe, letting those movies bomb hard in theaters despite having a budget of over millions of dollars was a very dumb move on their part and one that could cost them with their next cinematic universe.
That’s not to say there has been no superhero movie that has been a box office success in recent memory. Of course, there’s Spider-Man: No Way Home that made just under 2 billion dollars globally and is one of the most financially successful movies of all time. Last year also saw the success of The Batman making $770 million, Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness making $955 million, Thor: Love and Thunder making $760 million, and Black Panther: Wakanda Forever making $859 million. Regardless of what your overall opinions are on those movies, they were financial hits and four of the highest grossing films of last year. It’s not about the subgenre of what these movies are a part of, it’s about whether or not the word of mouth is strong enough that people will wanna go see these movies.
While Black Adam, Ant-Man and the Wasp: Quantumania, and Shazam!: Fury of the Gods underperforming at the box office is unfortunate and not a good sign for Marvel or DC, those properties weren’t necessarily the most financially successful out of either brand. However, if the superhero movies coming up that have proven to be box office hits such as Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3, Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse, The Marvels, Deadpool 3, The Batman: Part II, Joker: Folie à Deux, and even The Flash come out and are NOT financial successes, then that will likely be the sign of fatigue and lack of audience investment.
With the comic book/superhero sub-genre having taken some beatings as of late, it’s gonna have to take a handful of successes from both fan/critical reception and box office numbers to fight the fatigue narrative that’s been going on recently. It’s not gonna take one hit or another but a handful of hits in a row to get the sub-genre back on track. And this will all start in the next coming weeks with the release of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 3. If it’s a success, then that will be a step forward. If it’s not a success, then it will just add more fuel to the fire.
That’s why the success of Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 is majorly important not just for Marvel but for DC as well. Not only will it prove whether or not the mainstream audiences still view Marvel movies as a must-see but also whether or not they will see superhero movies in general as a must-see. This could decided if the DC Universe will have a chance to get a fair knock from the mainstream audiences or will it be just dead on arrival.
Even so, there’s no doubt that Marvel and James Gunn are aiming to end the series of the Guardians of the Galaxy on a high note. They know how important this is to themselves and the superhero sub-genre as we currently know it. Let’s hope the last run with our beloved galactic a-holes is one to remember fondly off.
Here’s a newest clip for Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3!
Other comments:
And btw, I did secure a pass to an early screening for this Friday. I’ll be sure to have my review on Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 as soon as possible. If the movie is as anywhere near as good as I hope it will be, then I will no doubt want to spread the word on it’s greatness as quick as I can so this movie makes all the money it deserves.
Back in February, I did a retrospective marathon of the three Batman: Arkham games developed by Rocksteady. Initially, I decided to do that marathon because I recently played through those games and wanted to write about them in anticipation for Suicide Squad: Kill The Justice League, the next game to come from Rocksteady and their first one for home consoles since concluding the Arkham series in 2015 with Arkham Knight. While that turned out to be too soon/pointless as the game has been delayed yet again until February 2024, I certainly did have fun talking about those games and giving my perspectives on them.
When it comes to Batman: Arkham Knight, while a critical and commercial success, there were certain things that stuck out about the game that left many fans feeling underwhelmed. While I still found it to be a great game in it’s own right and a strong conclusion to the series, I did find myself agreeing with the two most common criticisms of the game that held it back for a lot of people. Those two main criticism being the addition of the Batmobile and the character of the Arkham Knight itself. Granted, the Batmobile itself was something that really only got on my nerves towards the last third of the game to where it became very tedious and bloated with too many tank battles. The Arkham Knight, on the other hand, I certainly had issues with.
During my Arkham Knight retrospective, I claimed I wanted to make an entire piece talking about the character of the Arkham Knight himself and why I don’t think he works in the context of this game. Ever since I first beat Batman: Arkham Knight, there was something about the Arkham Knight himself that just didn’t land with me. While the idea of having a mysterious opponent that knows Batman’s every mood is interesting on paper, the execution of it in the game was quite iffy. It was only in my recent playthrough that I was able to understand why the Arkham Knight itself doesn’t work for me and I imagine for many others as well. However, before we talk about the main issues with the Arkham Knight, let’s first discuss who the Arkham Knight really is.
(Spoilers from here on out! You have been warned!)
Who Is The Arkham Knight?
Right before the main confrontation with Scarecrow, it is revealed that the Arkham Knight itself is no other than Jason Todd. For those unaware, Jason Todd was formerly known as Robin, Batman’s sidekick, and also is know in other Batman media as the Red Hood. The two had a strong bonding together until one day, Jason was thought to be dead by Batman. However, his death was faked by the Joker and held him captive at an abandoned wing of Arkham Asylum for over a year to break his sanity. The Joker would torture him on a daily basis until one day, he filmed himself shooting Jason at point blank rage, supposedly killing him. Joker sent Batman the film of his staged execution, which made Bruce himself believe that Jason was in fact dead. However, once again, that was all fake.
Sometime after being left for dead by the Joker, Jason was able to survive being shot at and was able to escape from the Asylum. According to the prequel comic book of Batman: Arkham Knight along with a 6-issue miniseries titled Batman: Arkham Knight Genesis, Jason had planned his vengeance against Batman by spending years assembling and training his own militia in Venezuela with the help of deadly assassin Deathstroke. It’s then he would later transform himself into the Arkham Knight itself. Once he was fully prepared and trained, the Arkham Knight would team up with Scarecrow on a Halloween night to take over Gotham City and destroy Batman once and for all.
When looking at those ideas and set-ups, it sounds really interesting. However, once you play the game, I couldn’t help but feel the Arkham Knight itself left plenty to be desired. Here are the main reasons why:
No Build-Up
The first main issue is how the character of Jason Todd seems to come out of nowhere in the context of the Arkhamverse itself. At this point and time, the universe of these games was so well-defined and explained where you basically knew every single important character in Batman’s lore. From his allies to his villains, there was no more room to throw in any more.
That didn’t stop Rocksteady from wanting to add in the story of Jason Todd/The Red Hood and have that be the main hook of the game. Before Arkham Knight, there was little to no build-up towards a potential appearance of Jason Todd himself. Sure, some might argue there was a reference or two from the other games but that was clearly all that it was meant to be, a reference or two, and not setting up Jason Todd later on down the road in the series. The Bat family had already been introduced and defined with Alfred, Robin, Nightwing, and Oracle/Batgirl. There was nothing hinting about another member of that family that happened to exist in Bruce’s decade-plus run as Batman in this timeline.
It’s also hard to buy how Batman, the World’s Greatest Detective, wasn’t able to discover an abandon wing in Arkham Asylum and find that’s where the Joker has been hiding Jason all along. If it was another place in Gotham City, I could buy that. But the Arkham Asylum itself, where Batman frequently visits to lock up the major criminals, no chance whatsoever. Yes, I know it was technically over just one single year but that is still plenty of time for Batman to be able to discover a secret hideout of his greatest enemy.
The inclusion of Jason Todd this late into the series comes across as a giant-cop out from Rocksteady. Instead of being able to come up with a wholly original villain of their own, they just made a re-skin version of another well-known Batman foe except with a different grudge against the Caped Crusader. While one could argue that Arkham City introducing as much allies as it did that weren’t in Arkham Asylum was starting to push it, having Jason Todd come out of practically nowhere at the last second is where Rocksteady took it a step too far in that regard.
He’s Not Scary Or Intimating
This might be more of an subjective criticism but another main problem I had when confronting the Arkham Knight was that I was never scared or intimated by him. Throughout the game, he is constantly going on and on how he knows everything about Batman and how he’s gonna kill him. Whenever he talks like that, I don’t get afraid of him, I just want him to shut up!
I get the Arkham Knight is suppose to have a grudge and obsession with Batman but his constant gloating gets tiresome really quick. By the third or fourth time you confront him and he is still going on and on about how much better he is than Batman, you are over his threats and almost want to mute the game every time he shows up. The character always talks and acts like he’s intimating but he barely ever showcases it throughout the game.
The Arkham Knight doesn’t really do anything worthy of making him stand out as a menacing bad guy in his own right except for capturing Barbara. Sure, he leads his own militia forces that would take over Gotham but almost any other Batman villain could do exactly that so that’s not worth giving credit where it’s due. If anything, it’s basically Scarecrow that forces the citizens of Gotham to evacuate as unleashed the fear toxin is what helps them take control of the city.
Rocksteady was clearly motivated to make a mysterious bad guy that would get under the skin of Batman but it honestly felt like he more got under the skin of the players more, which I don’t think was the intention. Instead of the Arkham Knight being scary or intimating, he was mostly just annoying. And considering he’s suppose to be one of the two main villains and represent the title of the actual game, that’s not a good thing whatsoever.
Lack Of A Satisfying Resolution
When you are building a character throughout the majority of the story and keeping their identity a secret for a long time, you have to make sure you find the proper resolution for that story arc so that it does not feel like so much time was wasted on keeping that identity a secret. Unfortunately, Arkham Knight falls into that exact trap with the way it wraps up the story of Jason Todd, both with the campaign and the Red Hood DLC story pack.
Once Batman defeats Jason after he reveals himself to be the Arkham Knight, he tries to convince his fallen Robin to come back home and find redemption in himself again. Because Jason feels like there is no redemption left in him, he refuses and escapes from Batman. At that point, he had now fully accepts his identity as no longer the Arkham Knight but now as the Red Hood.
However, during the final confrontation with Scarecrow after he unmasks Batman and threatens to kill him, the Red Hood appears and frees Bruce from captivity, who subdues Scarecrow with his own fear toxin. And then, he disappears once again and that’s about it. He just stops by as almost a deus ex machina to save Batman to let him defeat Scarecrow and then screws off again.
We don’t get a resolution, we don’t know if Jason just did that because he wanted to help Batman or he just hates Scarecrow more, and we don’t even get a dialogue exchange between the two or even a word spoken of him. He just comes in as some last heroic act and then goes back to being whoever the hell he is now. Is he now a hero, villain, or anti-hero? Your guess is as good as mine.
And before anyone makes a comment, we should also talk about the Red Hood DLC story pack that was released sometime after the game’s official release.
Since I imagine everyone had similar complaints as I did, Rocksteady would later release DLC for the Red Hood which was meant to take place after the events of Arkham Knight where Jason Todd has fully embraced his identity as Red Hood and goes up against Black Mask. It’s during the DLC where you go up against Black Mask and his army killing them off one-by-one, which ends with Red Hood bringing Black Mask to his death by tossing him out the window. While the concept of taking control of Red Hood, who is basically Batman with no restrictions, is fun in terms of gameplay, it’s very unsatisfying in terms of story.
All of this basically means that Jason himself has learned nothing from his experience as the Arkham Knight. His noble act at the end of the main story of saving Batman basically means nothing as he just went back to being the exact same guy as the Red Hood as he was as the Arkham Knight. So much so, that it feels like there’s very little difference between the two. It makes you wonder why they even bothered to have Jason take on two different identities if he never really changed as either one of them. Sure, he’s more of a killer this time than he was as the Arkham Knight but the game itself basically states that the only thing stopping himself from killing Batman and those close to him is strictly due to Scarecrow wanting them alive and not because he’s too cold to pull the trigger. And yes, I know that’s technically faithful to the source material to have Red Hood going off and killing his foes but that further goes to show how little he fits in this story.
You would also think that Batman would have at least wanted to check in on Red Hood to see where he had gone before faking his own death. Did he just assume Jason would be the same Robin he had before after saving him or that Robin and Nightwing would just track him down themselves? It’s way too much of an important plot detail to simply gloss over and makes you wonder if Bruce had second thoughts on activating the Knightfall Protocol before letting the Red Hood become a thing?
With so much time focused on this character and the way his identity was kept a secret from the majority of the game, you had to have the most satisfying payoff to his story imaginable that perfectly tied everything together to make it all worthwhile. Unfortunately, the way that the Arkham Knight/Red Hood story concludes left me as empty as it possibly could have been.
Marketing Over Storytelling
Back in 2013, a blockbuster known as Star Trek: Into Darkness made it’s way to theaters. Up to that film’s release, the marketing campaign tried their hardest to keep the mystery of Benedict Cumberbatch’s character a secret. Right when the trailers debuted, many Trekkies figured that character, who at the time was named John Harrison, would be the well-known series antagonist, Khan Noonien Singh. Despite the efforts from director J.J. Abrams and Benedict Cumberbatch of trying to throw everyone off by claiming that wasn’t Khan, it was revealed about an hour into the movie that the character of John Harrison was in fact Khan himself.
Even to this day, it felt like such a bizarre marketing tragedy to keep his identity a secret. Not only was the reveal of Khan thuddingly obvious to anyone who is familiar with Star Trek, but it served no importance to the narrative of the movie. Characters such as Kirk and Spock have virtually no reaction to that reveal and him being Khan didn’t really seemed to change anything aspect about the character. When looking at it from a fan’s standpoint, the reveal felt pointless and obvious. When looking at it from a casual audience standpoint, the reveal likely had them scratching their head in confusion because they had no idea what John Harrison being Khan was suppose to mean. It came across as hollow fan service that I don’t think even the people who wrote the script understood themselves.
Khan in Star Trek: Into Darkness was basically an incident of a character existing solely for the purpose of marketing and not because the character itself adds anything to the story. While handled in a different fashion, I can’t help but feel like Rocksteady fell into a similar trapping with the way they handled the Arkham itself in terms of the marketing for him and the story revolving around him.
To give credit to Rocksteady, the Arkham Knight itself was certainly MUCH better handled than with Khan in Into Darkness. At least the mystery of who the Arkham Knight is plays some importance to the narrative of the story and does provide some context from the source material as to who Jason Todd is and why him being a main villain is a shocking reveal to those not familiar with Batman lore. While the Arkham Knight is certainly more functional than Khan, I still can’t help but feel like the character’s main existence serves more from a marketing standpoint and not a storytelling one.
Similar to the lead-up to Into Darkness, Rocksteady did try to throw everyone off of who their mysterious character was. They even went on record that the Arkham Knight would be a completely original character created by themselves with collaboration from DC Comics. While that might technically be true from a certain point of view (*insert Luke Skywalker’s “A certain point of view?”*), from another view that basically comes across a blatant lie. Yes, the character of the Arkham Knight himself is an original one as this was the game that the character debuted in, but the identity of who he is not original in the slightest.
For those who are unaware of who Jason Todd was before this game, he was formally known in previous Batman lore as the Red Hood. In the film Batman: Under The Red Hood, he was a former apprentice of Batman who was left for dead, tortured by the Joker, was left dead again, and then survive to pursue his own sort of vigilante justice. Except this time, he would go a step further and kill his enemies one-by-one instead of sending them to jail. However, at a certain point in the film, the Red Hood reveals to Batman that he is no other than Jason Todd himself, his student who he thought was dead but is fully alive. If you are paying attention, the backstory of the Red Hood in the movie is basically the exact same as that of the Arkham Knight. However, there is one slight chance, his grudge against Batman.
In Under the Red Hood, Jason actually forgives Bruce for not saving him as he felt that he had every reason to believe he was dead. What pushed him over the edge was the fact that Batman had let the Joker live and never killed him despite the fact that the clown prince of crime may have been responsible for the death of his own partner. It’s then that Batman gives a fantastic speech as to why he hasn’t killed the Joker or any of his main enemies. Even though he has constantly thought about torturing and killing the Joker many times, he will not do it because if he starts to kill there, he may never stop once he starts down that dark path.
In the context of the Arkham Knight, Jason’s grudge against Batman is changed completely. They can’t have him being pissed at Batman for the Joker being alive because he’s now dead. So, they decided to make it to where Jason is in fact ticked at Batman for leaving him to die with the Joker and replacing him with haste. That in of itself might make for an engaging conflict for some but because Jason himself has had little to no build up in the series up to this point, the whole thing feels very tacked on and isn’t as important as the game wants you to believe.
Before the reveal, the only context we are given of Jason in the Arkhamverse is through these out-of-nowhere flashback sequences where we see the Joker torturing Jason Todd before he shoots him on camera, potentially killing him. Not to mention, these sections don’t appear until about a 3/4 of the way into the game and is inserted in the most forced and awkward way possible. I don’t know if it’s because Rocksteady thought that waiting that long to reveal Jason Todd would make it more appealing but at that point, anyone who hadn’t guessed who the Arkham Knight is yet probably had it spelt out for them during these sequences. Instead of feeling like smart foreshadowing, it comes across more as stalling an inevitable fate.
What makes it even worse is how little the Arkham Knight actually matters in terms of the story. The only main thing he accomplishes on his own that any other one of Batman foes couldn’t is that he captures Barbara and helps Batman at the very end. Just about anything else he does in the game is either a.) not important or b.) could have been handled by any other one of Batman foes. Despite being a part of the main title of the game and is suppose to be the main draw of the game, the Arkham Knight practically feels like a footnote in his own game.
This is where we go back to the marketing over storytelling claimed I made earlier. After Arkham City ended with Joker dying and having DLC later on with Harley Quinn attempting to get her revenge, Rocksteady likely found themselves hitting a brick wall on who the main villain of the next game would be. Because they felt like Scarecrow himself wouldn’t be enough to draw people in, they decided to make a mysterious “new” baddie for Batman to take down. Even if the character is basically a re-skinned version of another known Batman character, just change up his name and appearance so the marketing can set him up as being the main ultimate bad guy so that might get people interested in seeing how the Arkham series would conclude. While that makes for clever marketing, I don’t think it made for the best storytelling for the game. While it’s certainly not the worse version of this trend, the Arkham Knight plays with that exact trend nonetheless.
In Conclusion
Despite my main criticisms, I don’t think the Arkham Knight himself is a bad character or one that I hate. I just don’t think he works for this story.
The reveal of Jason Todd as the Arkham Knight is too obvious and on the nose, there’s hardly anything that makes him standout as being the next worthy foe of Batman, he’s not scary or menacing, there’s no satisfying resolution to this story, and he doesn’t have as much of a presence as the game thinks he actually does. While there are a few redeemable qualities to him such as the idea around him, his sick suit and Troy Baker’s performance, the character himself left plenty to be desired.
Above all, the Arkham Knight himself just seems like a character made for marketing purposes and not for story purposes. It’s as if Rocksteady was too caught up in trying to sell everyone of making their own badass villain that they never bother to put in as much effort into making sure he fits with the story organically.
This all makes me wonder how Paul Dini, the long-time Batman writer who wrote the scripts for Asylum and City, would have tackled the character of the Arkham Knight himself if Rocksteady had him return for this game. Would he gone the same direction as they did? Would he had Damian Wayne be the Arkham Knight instead? Would he had used a fully original character and find a way to make it fit in the context of the Arkhamverse? We will never know the answer to any of that but that is a question I imagine many Batman fans are still asking themselves to this day.
Let this be a lesson to future storytellers out there. When crafting a character whose identity is suppose to be a mystery and have that be the main selling point, make sure to put just as much (if not more) effort into the storytelling of the character as you do with the marketing. In order for a mysterious character to work, they have to be a character that makes sense in their own right and be interesting enough to where future viewings or playthroughs won’t be harmed once you know who the character really is.
While I still stand by the fact that Batman: Arkham Knight itself is a great game that ended the Arkham series on a high note, I also stand with the fact that while not necessarily being bad in his own right, the Arkham Knight just doesn’t work in the context of the Arkhamverse.
Time to try something new! I’ve recently got to see two movies early that have still yet to come out in theaters in the USA. Because of the fact these movies are fairly new and hardly anyone outside of critics or folks in advance screenings, I don’t want to go too deep into them. However, this does compel me to start doing some so-called mini-reviews whenever I’m able to see something early. In the sense, to where I won’t go that far into the movie itself and basically just be completely straight forward of giving the movie a thumbs up or thumbs down. Although I’ve already done reviews for movies that I’ve seen, it did feel like I went deeper into those movies than I really should have. These two movies I’m gonna be talking about are no other than Renfield and The Pope’s Exorcist. These are two movies that are set to open this weekend and I will let you know whether or not I think it’s worth your time. Again, I’m going over basic details and the pros and cons without digging too deep into any of it. That way, I can have more free time and you’ll know straight away if you should see it or not.
First off, Renfield.
To put it simply, Renfield is a mixed bag. On paper, it has the right ingredients to be an instant horror camp classic. You got Chris McKay, one of the funniest and creative guys in the entertainment business in the director’s chair, a cast of comedic talent such as Awkwafina and Ben Schwartz that have the range to carry the material, proving social/meta commentary on being in an abusive co-relationship, the perfect rating to show off it’s impressive blood, kills, gore, and over-the-top humor, and of course Nicky Cage as Count Dracula himself! However, despite being an entertaining time at the movies, it can never fully utilized it’s potential.
The ideas and character dynamics are never fleshed out as well as it can, most notably due to it’s relatively brief 93-minute long runtime. The potential intrigue of seeing a fully-formed relationship between Renfield and Dracula and the impact it has on others aren’t given the time it needs for proper depth because the movie is in such a rush to get from one set piece to the other. Which doesn’t help that the action for the first half is rather poor with awkward cuts, camera constantly shaking, and not feeling as stake heavy as it should. You also have Ben Schwartz that just disappear but then reappears whenever the movie needs them and the writers struggling to give Awkwafina’s character a real purpose to the story aside from giving Renfield a potential love interest.
While those that were expecting plenty of creativity in terms of story and depth will likely be underwhelmed, those that just come here to enjoy some brutal kills, campy humor, and Nicholas Cage killing it as Dracula will likely get their money’s worth. The rest of the cast is solid with Nicholas Hoult being engaging enough as Reinfield, Awkwafina being her usually charming self, and Ben Schwartz threatening to steal every scene he is in, even the ones where he’s with Cage. The make-up is convincing while gruesome and there is plenty of blood, gore, and dirty words to justify the movie’s R-rating.
Overall, Renfield is an enjoyable time but you can definitely tell the elements were there for a better picture. The ideas it has aren’t given time to flesh out, the characters, while fun, lack compelling depth and motivations, and the commentary that the movie constantly flirts with barely resonate because they mostly get pushed aside in favor of the movie’s humor and set pieces. That said, the humor and set pieces (at least in the second half anyway) still does it’s job and Nicolas Cage as Dracula is as much of a match made in heaven as you would expect. It’s a fun night out and makes for the perfect movie to see on a discount Tuesday but don’t go in expecting a classic because it never reaches there.
Next, we have The Pope’s Exorcist.
If you ever imagined a movie that felt like the worst and cheapest knock-off of The Conjuring and The Exorcist mix together with a laughable MCU franchise style ending, you basically get The Pope’s Exorcist. It’s a weak and poorly made exorcism film that does very little to stand out with the very best or even the very worst of these kind of movies. I can’t say it’s the worst movie of the year that I’ve seen but it’s certainly one of the most the least interesting and unremarkable experiences I have had of 2023.
It starts off well enough with an intriguing opening sequence and a premise that is set up rather well. Unfortunately, things begin to go off the rails right around the end of the first act and the movie basically feels like a betrayal of itself. For a movie that sets itself up to be a more serious and grounded exorcist movie, that ultimately gets undermined at a certain point as the film then commits to being as silly and over-the-top as possible.
The characters themselves are idiots who constantly do stupid decisions, the demons they fight are not frightening and beyond ridiculous, and it all leads to a climax and resolution so bizarre that I still don’t believe I actually saw it happen. You will also likely ask yourself certain questions about the demon towards the end. Most notably, why he waited until now to do something when he had all the time in the world to do it beforehand? Russell Crowe does what he can with the material and he does seem to be the only one aware of the kind of movie he is in but that is not enough to make this movie worth while.
The Pope’s Exorcist is ultimately a dud with no originality, entertainment, or scares to speak off. It’s a bad, disposable horror flick that doesn’t deserve your attention whatsoever. Russell Crowe is able to keep the whole thing watchable but nearly everything else falls flat on here. Feel free to skip this one!
There are times where being a reviewer is hard. This mostly comes from reviewing something based off an IP that you grew up loving that is clearly meant to revoke the nostalgia in you and remind you why you loved that property in the first place but doesn’t really have anything else to offer besides that. In the case of The Super Mario Bros. Movie, this is an example of a movie that basically walks a fine line between the fanboy mindset and the cynical mindset.
The fanboy mindset tells me that this might just be the most faithful video game adaption (with the exception of Arcane and The Last of Us) to date with breathtaking animation, amusing worth building, fun action setpieces, an outstanding original score, plenty of easter eggs, callbacks, and references from the games, fan favorite characters that get at least one or two moments to shine, and a voice cast which despite being celebrities, surprisingly fit quite well in their roles. Then comes the cynical mindset which can go on about the movie’s by-the-numbers storytelling, forced gags, awkwardly insert tracks, sticking to certain genre cliches to a T, and probably doesn’t work for those who aren’t fond of the source material it’s based on.
While I can totally see someone leaning one way or the other, by the end of the day, you have to remember what you are getting yourself into and what kind of movie you are watching. If you are someone that goes into a Mario movie in hopes to have storytelling, character development, and depth on par with the likes of Spider-Man:Into the Spider-Verse and Puss in Boots: The Last Wish, then you really didn’t know what you are getting into and will likely be disappointed. However, if you are someone that goes into a Mario movie for the eye popping visuals, fun set pieces, iconic tracks getting remastered, seeing some of your favorite characters using your favorite power-ups, and just enjoy finding the easter eggs in something you like, then you will likely have a good time. For me, I leaned into the latter and because of that, I quite enjoyed myself.
Is it a great movie overall? No! Does it contain some elements that I’ve grown tiresome with Illumination Animation? Definitely! But, is it a Mario movie that feels like it was made by fans for fans? Absolutely!
Plot Synopsis: Based off the extremely successful video game franchise from Nintendo, we have an origin story for the brothers and Italian American plumbers Mario (Chris Pratt) and Luigi (Charlie Day). During accomplishing a job for their struggling plumbing business, Mario and Luigi are split up as they find themselves teleported to the alternate world known as the Mushroom Kingdom. It’s soon discover that the two find themselves entangled in a battle between Mushroom Kingdom, led by their princess named Peach (Anya Taylor-Joy) and the Koopas, led by the evil, menacing Bowser (Jack Black).
As Luigi find himself captive by Bowser himself, Mario is right outside the Mushroom Kingdom where he runs into Toad (Keegan-Michael Key) who takes him to Princess Peach herself. Peach, who has had plenty of experience in combat and adventuring, plans to stop Bowser by forging an alliance with the Jungle Kingdom led by King Cranky Kong (Fred Armisen) and his son Donkey Kong (Seth Rogen). Once the princess meets Mario, she agrees to have him tag along to help save his brother, Luigi but must first teach Mario how to actually be the Mario we all know and love and be his guide across the Mushroom Kingdom.
We then see Mario, Peach, and Toad go on an adventure together to stop Bowser and save Luigi before Bowser himself is able to carry out his deadly plan to destroy the Mushroom Kingdom and force the princess to be his bride.
Let’s first get this out of the way since this has been a common criticism of the movie. Yes, the plot is very thin and straight forward with as much meaning as the scene in the original game where Toad says, “Sorry, Mario! Your princess is in another castle!” (which this movie references in the best way). Just like the games, it mostly exists just for characters to get from Point A to Point B and show off the amazing and colorful worlds that Mario and crew have to fight their way towards. There’s not much themes of the movie other than, the power of brotherhood and being an underdog can be cool sometimes, and most of the plots beats and character arcs are ones you can see coming from a mile away. However, isn’t that Mario at his core?
I’m not one to excuse lazy writing but in this case, it feels more like proper writing. Mario isn’t really known as a character with much depth and his stories tend to be lighthearted, straight forward fairytale-like plots where he needs to stop Bowser and save someone or something in the process. Is that much? No. Is it Mario! Absolutely yes! The story itself isn’t anything we never seen before but again, who really goes into a Mario movie for the story?
I imagine the elements that fans go into a Mario movie for is to see their favorite Italian plumber and his allies go on adventures together, performing platforming sections, unlock special power abilities, explore the ins-and-outs of the world, listen to some good tunes, ride a go-kart or two, and be amazed by the amazing visuals. If that’s what you are going into a Mario movie for, then you should be more than satisfied as the movie delivers all of that exactly as you want.
The animation as you would expect for any big animated movie nowadays is STUNNING! The worlds and characters themselves look incredibly gorgeous and feel like they were ripped straight from the games. So much so, there are times to where it feels like these could be cutscenes ripped directly from a Mario game in 2023 and you wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. The way that each characters goes from different locations scattered throughout is an absolute treat for the eyes. If it wasn’t for the scenes in Brooklyn with the hilariously out-of-place looking dogs that looks it was ripped from The Secret Life of Pets, I wouldn’t even have guessed this was from Illumination Animation as well.
And as I’ve stated in the beginning, I don’t think I have seen a more faithful adaption in movie form than with The Super Mario Bros. Movie. The movie is filled with callbacks and references to the games that it’s able to perfectly translated onto the big screen. Think about at least one noteworthy thing from your favorite Mario games and there’s a good chance it’s in this movie. We get the classic power-ups such as red mushrooms, blue mushrooms, red flowers, blue flowers, and even the tanooki suit! We get the castle that is taking directly from Super Mario 64! We get a Peach’s training course which is taking directly from Super Mario Maker! We get a rainbow road track that’s taking directly from Mario Kart Wii and 8! And we even get a cameo with *Spoiler!* from *Spoiler*!
While I’m sure plenty will claim that is too much fan service, but I honestly don’t know how the movie could have worked without it. I imagine most fans of the games will want the movie to remind them of the games. After all these years of folks complaining about how video game movies are nothing like the games, are we really now gonna complain when video game movies are actually similar to the games? I’m not a hypocrite so I wouldn’t do that.
When it comes to the voice cast, while it’s certainly full of recognizable celebrities, they do fit their roles quite well. First off, YES, Chris Pratt is just fine as Mario! Despite all of the controversy surrounding his casting (admittedly from me as well), especially with the fact that he’s not Italian or has an accent, he’s able to hold his own just fine as the Italian Plumber without ever become obnoxious or hard to listen to. It does take a moment or two to get use to his voice but once I did, I didn’t hear Star Lord or Emmet trying to play Mario, I just heard Mario. And for those wondering, yes the accent thing is immediately addressed in the movie.
Everyone else is just fine as well. Charlie Day is likable as Luigi and has great chemistry with Pratt, even if he doesn’t have nearly as much screen time as I would have liked. Anya Taylor-Joy brings enough charm and personality to this stronger version of Peach that felt like a mix of between her character in 3D World and Super Smash Bros. Keegan-Michael Key brings plenty of laughs as Toad and has probably some of the funnier moments in the movie. Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong sounds exactly what you would expect Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong to sound like. Charles Martinet, the original voice of Mario and Luigi, is able to shine on his own with the cameos he’s given to voice. Lastly, Jack Black as Bowser is absolute perfection as you knew he would be and that’s all that needs to be said about that!
In terms of the music, this is where I start to get into the negatives with this movie. When it comes to the original tracks and remixes by Brian Tyler and Koji Kondo, they are stellar. I can imagine those two had the time of their lives being able to take these iconic tracks that has help shaped the identity of Mario and make it something of their own. So much so, that this might be one of the few times where I actually want to buy the soundtrack of the movie because of how good it sounds. It’s the tracks from other things that are inserted in here that took me out of it.
While the songs they chose aren’t bad in their own rights, they don’t feel like they have a place in a Mario movie. Say what you will about the Sonic The Hedgehog movies having well-known songs but it made more sense there since it was live-action and meant to be taking place in the real world with real humans. For Mario, even when it technically takes place in a real world of Brooklyn, is not a world which well-known songs should be added in, just original tracks and songs from it’s own thing. That’s part of where the Illumination animation influence of the movie bothered me.
I’m gonna go on record of saying that I am normally not a fan of the movies by Illumination Animation. They often tend to make the most average, run-of-the-mill, kids movies imaginable that try to be as safe and disposable as possible just because it’s for kids. While I enjoyed the original Despicable Me just fine, I’ve had a hard time of connecting to any other movie that they’ve made since then. So the fact that I enjoyed The Super Mario Bros Movie should not be seen as a compliment on their part. If anything, it feels more like I enjoyed the movie in spite of Illumination and not because of them.
Much like other Illumination movies, there are times to where the movie is too gagged heavy, moves too fast, and doesn’t give you a lot of moments to breathe and get yourself sucked into the Mario worlds as we know it. It’s not as bad as in their other movies mostly because there’s just too many eye-popping scenes involving the Mario characters doing something we liked from the games, it’s never given a chance to bring the whole thing down. I give credit to Nintendo on that part as they clearly made sure that this doesn’t get screwed up.
The biggest negative of the movie has to do with the treatment of Luigi himself. While I’m glad they were able to keep the innocent and fraidy-cat personality that Luigi has always had, he gets quite sidelined throughout the good majority of the movie because he exists just to be a captured victim for Bowser. I get that the filmmakers didn’t want to make Peach the damsel in distress this time around and probably thought that Luigi getting kidnapped by Bowser would make Mario more motivated to stop the monster for their first ever encounter but it certainly doesn’t do the character or even movie any favors. There’s almost a good half-hour of the movie where the character vanishes completely and you almost completely forget he’s actually in it. I can almost forgive that because he is giving at least one awesome scene in the climax, but it certainly makes the title of The Super Mario Bros. Movie a tad misleading since it’s mostly just Mario with the focus and not Luigi. If anything, this movie would have been better off not having any damsel in distress except for toads or adorable looking creatures and just had Luigi join alongside Mario, Peach, and Toad to save the day.
I’ll admit, if I was not a fan of Mario or had no attachment to the character, I probably wouldn’t have enjoyed this movie as much and just see it as another “meh” kids movie from Illumination. But, because I am a fan, I was quite satisfied. If anyone that has been a fan of Mario at some point in their life, I can’t imagine they won’t have some sort of satisfaction with The Super Mario Bros. Movie.
I understand we live in a time where movies with “fan service” are getting quite tiresome and “critic/fanboy proof” but this is one of the rare occasions to where it’s just find for it to be complete fan service and nothing more to justify it’s existence. Because it’s clear that the cast and crew were having a lot of fun making this movie and I had a lot of fun watching it.
If you want a recent animated movie with more effort put to storytelling and character development, go watch Puss In Boots: The Last Wish (which you REALLY should) or wait for Spider-Man: Across The Spider-Verse to come out in June. If you want a Mario movie that feels like the most faithful adaption of the games possible, go watch The Super Mario Bros. Movie.
Other comments:
Yes, this is the real review and how I actually felt about the movie!
Yes, there are two post-credit scenes!
Ironic how a movie that has been described as an “Easter egg” movie is being released the same time as Easter weekend! Just all too fitting!
There’s one scene in the movie with Bowser singing a song for Peach that is a perfect reminder that Jack Black has a lovely singing voice.
I can’t be the only one that thought of Elsa from Frozen when Peach got her ice power-up! You knew darn well that Illumination purposely ripped that off because they just couldn’t help themselves. It was still cool tho.
If you are expecting a lot of Yoshi or even any form of Yoshi, prepare for disappointment! And no that “tease” does NOT help either!
There’s at least one scene in the climax that was about as goosebumps heavy as the scene in Sonic 2 where Sonic turns into his Super form! It’s just something the child in me as been waiting for my whole life to see!
I might do a list of my Top 10 Favorite Mario Games this weekend because why not?
John Wick: Chapter 4 has been out for over a week now. I’m sure most of those that were wanting to see the film has already seen it by now. Because of that, now is a good time to talk about the big spoilers for the picture, particularly it’s rather surprising ending. While I haven’t seen too many thoughts about the the ending, I would imagine people are rather split down the middle of it or possibly even confused about it.
Although, I do think the one ringing question that anyone has about it is whether or not the franchise itself will stand by that ending? Despite it being the best way to wrap up story of John Wick himself and have his whole journey come full circle, will Lionsgate toss the ending aside and make it a footnote for the future just so the John Wick universe itself can keep going? First off, we have to discuss what the ending was itself and everything that has led up to it.
*Warning! The rest of this article contains MAJOR spoilers for John Wick: Chapter 4! If you haven’t seen the movie yet and don’t want anything spoilers, then you might want to click off the article right now! You have been warned!*
So, basically the whole journey of John Wick: Chapter 4 has to do with John Wick himself taking the entire High Table head on with the knowledge of having both nothing and everything to live for at the same time. While there’s not anyone too attach to himself that would scar him mentally as the death of his wife and their dog did, the thought of sucking down that one last breath without avenging the death of his loved ones is something that John Wick just cannot bear. Which is why we constantly see John pursuing himself beyond measures and not stop until the High Table is stopped which would granted his freedom.
After we go through one of the most thoroughly impressive stairwell fight scenes in any film, we see John and his old pal Caine come together for one last showdown, one which was arranged from that High Table that would take place at sunset. The one that is guaranteed to gain the freedom of whoever survives the encounter. With that freedom, their name will be cleared and whoever lives will no longer be hunted by the High Table ever again.
During the showdown, John and Caine suffer serious wounds after the first two rounds of dueling. The third round comes to a halt when Caine shoots John for a third time where John appears to have missed. It’s then that De Gramont is so eager to watch John die that he wants to take matters into his own hand and kill the hitman himself. But, as it turns out, John did not actually fire the third bullet yet and uses that shot he has to kill De Gramont point blank.
After that, the Harbinger grants Caine and John their freedom from the High Table while Wintson is reinstated. While Caine is able to walk away with his injuries, John is not so fortunate. Instead, he collapses on the staircase and reminisces the lasting memories of his life and marriage that he can now fully put behind him. Now that he is free, he can rest. And rest is exactly what comes next for John, permanently.
Once he takes that one last glorious moment to remind himself that he has avenged his wife, dog, and himself, John Wick passes way due to his injuries. Sometime later, Winston and the Bowery King send their farewells to John at a gravesite where he is buried next of his wife, Helen.
He’s Dead,……Jim?
So, yep John Wick is dead! Despite everything that John has survived throughout the course of these movies and his entire life as a deadly assassin, that is what kills him. A couple of gunshots to the gut that he just didn’t have enough time to recover from. While I imagine that can be viewed as rather anticlimactic by some people to have that be the end of John Wick, I think it’s a bit more complicated than that.
I’m sure John himself could have pushed himself to survive those wounds and get it treated immediately if he wanted to. I mean this is a guy that was able to walk away after getting run over by a car repeatedly, smashed through glass walls, be thrown from one floor to another, and even survive falling down a building. If he could make it through all of that, why can’t he just do it again? The short answer: Because he had no reason to.
The main driving force for John and the reason he came out of retirement since the first movie was to hunt down his feared enemies had to do with the unfinished deeds surrounding his wife and the dog that she left behind for him. That’s why for all the stabs, punches, and gunshots he’s taken, he made himself recover from all of that. Why? Because he still had a purpose to serve, a job to serve, and a deed to finish. Without any of those, John Wick had no reason to continue doing what he does beat. However, now that he accomplishes everything he set himself out to do, he can now rest and is hopefully somewhere up top and leaving peacefully with his wife and their dog. Or, that’s at least what they wants us to think.
Will Lionsgate Stand By The Ending?
Of course, the big question is whether or not they will actually stand by that ending. After all, Lionsgate had already announced plans for a Chapter 5 before Chapter 4 was even finished, with the idea of shooting Chapter 4 and 5 back-to-back. However, that idea was eventually scraped as Keanu Reeves and Chad Stahelski wanting to just focus strictly on making the fourth movie. The two had also came out before the movie released that they were looking to take a break from the series and give themselves a rest for it.
However, after the early strong box office numbers for Chapter 4, there seems to be some motivation from Lionsgate to make a Chapter 5, when Stahelski even recently claiming that he would be open to return for another John Wick picture. It remains to be seen if we will get a Chapter 5 sometime soon but even then, I think we’ve gotten to a place within the universe of John Wick that it might be time to draw the focus on other characters outside of John Wick himself.
The Potential Future
We know that there is a Ballerina movie in the works with Ana De Armas that is set to come out next summer. That sounds intriguing, especially after seeing De Armas hold her own in her awesome extended cameo in No Time To Die, but that might just open the box for plenty of other interesting side stories that can be told in this universe.
There’s characters such as Sophia and Akira that have interesting backstories and connections to John Wick along with having perfect set-ups that could lead to their own movies or series. And if the post-credit scene of Chapter 4 is any indication, with Caine returning to Paris to reunite with his daughter but is approached by Akira, that could potentially be the direction that this franchise is looking towards. Whether or not Chapter 5 is made, there is still other stories that can be told without John Wick being the sole focus that could keep people interested in this franchise for the future.
I’m not gonna act like I know the future of John Wick as your guess is as good as mine. Even so, Chapter 4 does a great job of tying up the loose ends from the previous movies and having the entire series come to satisfying conclusive circle. Keanu Reeves and Chad Stahleski had a lot to be proud of with what they’ve accomplished with this series and I can’t wait to see what they’ve come up with next.
Until then, I hope the two of them are enjoying a nice relaxing vacation in Hawaii. And make sure to go see John Wick: Chapter 4 in theaters because it rocks!
When it comes to video game adaptations, you always tend to expect the worse. No matter how or why, Hollywood always seems to drop the ball with it no matter what. Whether it’s because they do their damnest to either be unfaithful to the material as possible and even try as hard to be as completely faithful as possible, they can just never get it right. Never mind the fact we got plenty of good ones in recent memory such as Detective Pikachu, Angry Birds 2, Sonic The Hedgehog 1 & 2, Arcane, and just recently with The Last of Us. Those don’t count because as we all know, there is no such thing as a good video game movie or show. Because if there was, then it would ruined the media’s own personal agenda of spreading the narrative of there never being a good video game adaption. At this point, we’ve trained ourselves to never get our hopes up for these kinds of adaptions because there can never be good just because. However, just moments after coming off my super early advance screening for Illumination’s The Super Mario Bros Movie, I realized that I have witness with my own eyes a new low for video game adaptions. The kind that it’s so bad that it makes you question why you even liked the games it was based off of in the first place. Not only is The Super Mario Bros Movie the worst Illumination movie I’ve ever seen, it’s the worst video game movie ever made and has joined the list of worst movies ever made period. I’ll take that 1993 live-action movie ever day over this pile of dogs*it!
Yes, it’s as obnoxious with it’s fan service and references as the trailers would suggest. Yes, they actually try to make Mario an actual character with a personality and have actual lines of dialogue despite the fact he’s never been an actual character with a personality or actual lines of dialogue. Yes, they actually make Luigi the damsel in distress this time around instead of Princess Peach because we can no longer have women that need to be rescued because women are now strong and independent and don’t need no man, am I right? Yes, it is so pandering with it’s wokeness by including sooooooo many shots of rainbows and even has a male character telling another male character that he’s “cute”. Yes, Chris Pratt is as ever bit of amazing as Mario as you knew he would be and Jack Black as Bowser was as ever bit of awful as you knew he would be. Yes, it has the most breathtaking animation I’ve seen since The Emoji Movie. The Super Mario Bros Movie is like a mix of the worst tropes of video game adaptions, animation flicks, and Hollywood movies all rolled into one. I never thought it could get worst for Mario than Super Mario Sunshine but I was proven wrong.
Plot Description: It’s Mario. It’s not suppose to have an actual plot other than getting from Point A to Point B constantly because our princess is in another castle. What did you expect?For the movie to be unfaithful to it’s material by having a real plot. They can’t because otherwise it’s a bad adaption by default. Silly toads!
I could go into lengths of everything that doesn’t work about this movie but it’s easy to tell you the things that did work and leave at that. Firstly, the animation is stunning. It looks like it was ripped straight from the CGI cutscenes of any Mario game. But then again, saying the animation is good in a movie in 2023 is like saying that the sky is blue and the grass is green. It’s so obvious at this point that it doesn’t matter.
Lastly, Chris Pratt as Mario is about as perfect of a casting than I ever imagined. Never mind the fact he fails badly at pulling off a convincing Italian accent and doesn’t sound even remotely like Charles Martinet, he’s still ORGASMIC as Mario! That one moment in the movie where he goes “WAHOO!” made me jizz in my pants in the theater. This is easily the best casting decision in a video game movie ever next to Tom Holland as Peter Park…….I mean Nathan Drake. Unfortunately, that’s where the positives end. There’s so many things wrong with this movie it’s hard to know where to even start.
First off, why does this movie have an actual story it’s trying to tell, characters it’s looking to develop, and an overall message it’s wanting to say to the audiences? Everyone knows that anything related to Mario is not suppose to have any of these. The gameplay and graphics are what matter most, not the story, characters, or so-called themes. Like what is this movie trying to be? An actual movie? Just give me a mute Mario who has to go from world to world, collect special items, fight whoever stands in his way, beat Bowser, and rescue Princess Peach by the end because that’s what he does best. There’s no need to change things up or do anything different because that’s just not Mario. This movie had one simple job in that department and it failed miserably. And it gets even worse.
Mario is NOTHING like the Mario in the games. Instead of being the reliable every day hero that he always has been, he’s incredibly too stupid, incompetent, and is a screw up way too much. Never mind the fact that this movie is suppose to act as an origin story for Mario and where he learns how to actually be the reliable every day hero, he’s suppose to be perfect right from the start and shouldn’t have to undergo a so-called arc on how to be a hero. He already is a hero! How is this guy suppose to rescue Princess Peach over and over again when he can’t even save his own ass from Donkey Kong?
Next, we have Luigi who just like Mario, is nothing like how he is in the games. Instead of being the confident little bro who’s never afraid of everything, he’s now nothing more than an annoying little weasel who is scared of everything and needs to be saved 24/7. Never mind the fact that him being captured by Bowser helps sets up the rivalry between Mario and Bowser which gives Mario real motivations to want to stop Bowser or that Luigi has always been kinda of a wimp and fraidy cat, especially with ghosts, he’s suppose to be fighting alongside his brothers to save the day because that’s what heroes do. But nooooo, instead we get to see him and his brother be striped down from their heroic traits just so Princess Peach gets her time to shine! Speaking of which!
And where to begin with Princess Peach! Everyone knows that Peach was never suppose to be an actual character but more of an object for Mario to rescue over and over again. Never mind the fact that she’s been a playable character in other games, has had more of a role than simply being a damsel in distress in recent games, and even had a game on the Nintendo DS that no one remembers where she had to go save Mario’s ass from Bowser herself, Peach has never been a strong or badass character in any way until now because of course, she has to be. Because we can’t have any women needing to be saved nowadays, they got to be strong and independent with no need for a man. And don’t get me started on that scene where she’s lecturing Mario about his white privilege and the way the patriarchy of the Mushroom Kingdom is constantly putting her down. If Nintendo or Illumination wanted to make a strong female character, they should have took notes from The Emoji Movie. The character of Jailbreak in that movie was truly groundbreaking for female empowerment.
Unfortunately, the wokeness in the movie doesn’t stop with Peach. There is sooooooo many shots in this movie of the rainbow road because, of course there is. You just always have to find a way to virtue signal to the lgbt+ community in everything nowadays and there you go. Never mind the fact that rainbow road has always been a thing in Mario and has never had anything to do with pride, putting a rainbow in anything is an automatic red flag. And there’s also the laughable attempt at making a gay character. That scene where the Penguin tells Luigi that the little male star is cute was so forced and on the nose. And let’s not forget that scene at the end where Peach and Daisy make out. I have nothing against gay characters but do they have be in everything nowadays? When does the straight crowd get love again?
In terms of production wise, it’s really bad as well. The animation is soooooo good that it’s bad. Why does it have to look exactly like the games? If I wanted to play a Mario game, I’ll play a Mario game and not watch a movie. The score is beautiful but unoriginal and contains too many tracks that are just rehashes of all the well-known tracks in the Mario series. If I wanted to listen the original Mario theme, I would listen to the original Mario theme. Or did I mention that they had an ENTIRE section of a Mario Kart track with all the known Mario characters in existence but yet there was never ONE scene with a blue turtle shell coming in to knock out who ever is in first place?! That really says it all.
In terms of the voice cast, leave it to Illumination to hire a bunch of well-known celebrities just because of their reputation and not because they actually fit their characters. Chris Pratt is an amazing Mario however. He doesn’t sound anything remotely like him but he’s good because he’s Chris Pratt. Jack Black is a terrible Bowser and it just seems like he’s trying to copy the voice from the games without doing something new of it’s own. Why not just get the actor from the games if Black was just gonna do the same kind of voice again? Anya Taylor Joy brings way too much energy and charisma to Peach, a character that suppose to be completely void of a personality or charm. Seth Rogen as Donkey Kong is just basically Seth Rogen playing himself. Keegan-Michael Key as Toad is just basically Keegan-Michael Key playing himself as well. Never mind the fact that Mario has never really been known for it’s superb voice acting, with the exception of the masterpiece that is Super Mario Sunshine, it doesn’t suit these characters whatsoever and the voice cast just takes you out of it because it’s just actors that are playing these characters and not VOICE actors. There’s a clear difference!
In short, The Super Mario Bros Movie is nothing sort of a disaster! Not only is it a terrible adaption of the Mario series, it’s a terrible film in general. Which is a massive shame because Illumination has had such a perfect track record with their movies, especially their latest one in Minions 2: The Rise of Gru. Unfortunately, they along with Nintendo just completely dropped the ball here. How they got the movie of the most famous video game character of all time so wrong is beyond me!
If you want to see a Mario movie done right, just watch the 1993 live-action movie. That is how a Mario movie is suppose to be done, not this crap!
One star for the animation! Zero for everything else!
Every year, there comes that one film that just blows you away. That one film that just speaks to you on a personal level and changes the way you think about yourself. You don’t know how or why but it just amazes you in every way. It gives you hope for not just movies but in humanity! When it comes to all the movies that I’ve seen this year, there is not one that has fit that description perfectly than Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey. It’s easily the best Winnie The Pooh movie ever made and definitely better than all of that Disney crap that didn’t understand the character. It’s the darkest Winnie The Pooh movie to date and finally gives the fans of the character the serious tone they have been looking for along with addressing all the complaints that everyone had about the Disney adaptions. It’s an instant horror movie classic that delivers the scares, kills, and gores that we’ve all been waiting for. And it’s the best movie of 2023! Take that John Wick and Marvel!
Premise: Christopher Robin is headed off to college and he has abandoned his old friends, Pooh and Piglet, which then leads to the duo embracing their inner monsters.
I would go further with the plot description but I don’t know if I can. Not because I don’t wanna spoil anything since there’s really nothing to spoil about the movie but I couldn’t tell you what the story is aside from that. It’s all over the place with it constantly cutting back and forth to the Winnie the Pooh characters, Christopher Robin, and whoever else is in the movie. There’s also the fact that there are undeveloped characters and tacky subplots that come in out of nowhere, then completely disappear for long stretches of the movie before reappearing again out of nowhere, and it all turns out to be complete pointless by the end of the movie. But hey, who cares about any of that right? If you want a good story or character development, go read a book or something. What anyone cares about in a horror movie is the scares and kills and oh man, do they deliver!
This is one of the most scary movies I’ve even seen in my life. Even though it’s basically the same cheap jump scare over and over and over again, I still fell for it every single time because of how well it’s done. Every time Pooh comes out of nowhere to scare Christopher Robin or his girlfriend, it was so terrifying that it made me look behind my back to see if he was right there about to get me as well. If a movie can terrify you so much that it makes you believe that the scary person is literally right there with you when you are watching it, then it’s definitely doing something right.
And don’t even get me started on the kills, this has some of the most bloodiest, goriest, and satisfying kills in any horror movie I’ve ever seen. It’s certainly better than the ones that was in Scream 6 where it didn’t even look real at all. This however, felt so real that I basically felt the character’s pain. During that scene where Pooh and Piglet are torturing Christopher Robin by whipping him repeatedly in his naked back, I felt every single bit of that pain. So much so that I nearly threw out my back trying to put lotion on it just to make sure that I didn’t too feel the pain. That other scene where Pooh is going around and murdering Christopher Robin’s friends with a hammer blows any killing scene in any Texas Chainsaw movie out of the water.
The best thing about this move however is how it accomplishes the one thing that all fans of Winnie the Pooh have always wanted to see, Pooh and his friends getting revenge on Christopher Robin for abandoning them. Unlike that Disney live-action movie that was too scared to go into that because they have to make it kid-friendly, this one is finally able to deliver the perfect story of vengeance that everyone has been wanting to see. Never mind the fact that Christopher Robin was getting older, had to move on with his life, andPooh, Piglet, Tigger, Owl and Rabbit aren’t even suppose to be real, that little bastard abandoned the only friends he ever had and deserves all the scorn he get. It’s such an empowering, uplifting story of time, loneliness, and abandonment. It reminds us that we are not alone and there is always someone that will stab us in the back. And when that happens, you can stabbed them in the back as well. It’s only fair after all.
From a directing and production standpoint, well, it’s quite shitty. The directing is all over the place, the editing is choppy, and the blood and gore just look like ketchup and spaghetti and meatballs. But then again, it was the director’s first ever big mainstream movie so he deserves some slack. Plus, he was only given a budget of 100,000 dollars, so it’s not like you can expect it to be actually good. Never mind the fact that well-known movies such as Clerks and The Blair Witch Project were made for even less of that budget but then again, who cares. Who watches a movie for that anyway? If you wanna watch something with good direction or production, go watch a Broadway musical or something.
One more thing that is worth mentioning are the performances from these actors and actresses who I have never heard off and don’t remember their names from the credits. However, that’s a good thing because it allows themselves to completely embody their roles without having you think of any well-known actor that it completely takes you out of it. Unlike in say Christopher Robin where I never bought Ewan McGregor as Christopher Robin and I just saw Obi-Wan Kenobi pretending to be Christopher Robin. The fact this cast is so unknown that they don’t even have their own Wikipedia article makes it all the more better because it makes you realize that anyone can act professionally. Sure, the moments where they have to cry and be scare fall flat because you can tell that they are either inexperienced or not being directed very bell, but then again, who cares. If you wanna watch something with good acting, go watch a play or something.
Overall, Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey is about as pitch perfect as movies can get. It’s scary, terrifying, contains plenty of scares and kills, takes itself incredibly seriously, and finally gives Christopher Robin the brutal death that asshole has deserved for all these years. Sure, it’s poorly made, written, acted, and does basically nothing new or interesting in it’s premise but who cares when it’s a literal masterpiece.
Hollywood should take notes from this movie! It’s then they might realize that it’s time to stop making these movies based off of children properties and make them strictly for adults. The kids have had their chance but it’s the adults that matter now! And if Winnie The Pooh: Blood and Honey is anything to go by, then the future of cinema is safe. It’s the best movie of the year and the best movie of the decade so far! Forget about that Dungeons and Dragons crap or that new woke Mario movie, this is what movies are about!
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